New member here…

__Dolly__

Hi! I’m so glad to have found this online support and this specific group which I feel like I can say I fit in.

i’m 49 and my DH is 78 and has been diagnosed with VD a couple of years ago. He had a successful heart surgery late last year and all diagnostic tests and check ups have been good and stable especially with regards to his Brain MRi (previous tests showed that he has CAA).

We have no kids together and we live by ourselves. He has a daughter in previous marriage and he rarely saw prior to his surgery last year. Now he gets upset that she wants to make up for lost time by visiting him 5x a week. He said he can only do once a month. He easily gets irritated too by daily phone calls and has stopped picking them up (his daughter is blaming me for blocking them seeing each other). His daughter only has one son who he rarely sees too even though we’re in the same city.

Our main goal is to stay home. I work in the healthcare and I don’t want him to be admitted in a MC (I’ve worked in some for more than 10 years).

I cut down working from full time to part time. It was getting hard to leave him in the morning because he gets upset that I leave him. So far, it’s working for us until today. My mom and stepdad came to pick him up for a concert but he was lethargic. They waited until I got home and we went out for dinner. My DH went back to bed right away. He said he’s feeling ok, bp is normal and just wants to sleep. At midnight, he got up and when I followed him, I saw him peeing on the floor of our entrance hallway (this is 3rd time in 2 weeks and I’m considering telling his primary doctor about it).

Now i’m not sure whether I should leave him alone. He’s still very much independent and can still drive as long as I am with him. In fact, he’s more domesticated than me and he do the cooking and other chores. He still goes to his book club and art classes at the senior center.

On my days off, we enjoy going to museums, watching movies and we have season tickets with the symphony. We also love to go on short car trips (i don’t mind driving).

Sorry for this long and rambling introduction and looking forward to reading new posts.