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Just need to talk to my friends (205) May 2025
Thanks, CaroLynn, I kept meaning to do this yesterday and never got around to it. Chilly and c!oudy here this morning. I checked and WM will deliver something so had to go out and open the gate so they can come through and turn around without backing all the way to the road. Then. fixed my cereal and hot tea, got back in…
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The Caregiver’s Brain
Greetings Friends, I have not posted here in six months. My wife’s dementia has been moving at a snail’s pace. The days, weeks, and months have melded into a fuzzy blob of time, and one day is exactly like all the others. I am nine and a half years into care giving, and the word “decade” will soon be added to the divisions…
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Memantine
Hi, I am new to this group. My DH was recently diagnosed with "Alzheimer's type dementia". On the 7-step scale, I would rate him between 3 and 4. We are waiting to meet with a neurologist. In the mean time, our PCP has prescribed a drug called Memantine. Are any of you willing to share your experience with this drug?
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Hypersexuality
My DH has been driving me crazy for a few years with sexual comments all day. The other day at doctor's office he told the nurse she had sexy shoes. This is the first time such comments were made to others. Never before this disease would he say something like that. Several months I spoke with his geriatric doctor about…
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Advice on next steps please
Hello All, I am looking for some advice from the experts here. My DH (62) does not have a diagnosis yet, but I suspect bvFTD (that is the behavioral variant of FTD. He has some memory issues, but his behavior changed dramatically in a very short period of time and I see him struggling with his executive functioning and…
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First Post. I’m living with 2 challenging men.
So very grateful that you all share your stories. I’m learning all I can. I’m truly frightened for our future. My DH, age 73 hasn’t been diagnosed with dementia yet. I suspect he’s in stage 3. Maybe 4? Of vascular dementia and ALZ. His neurology report states ‘probable mild cognitive impairment’. Dr prescribed aricept and…
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Am I being unreasonable?
I’m 81, my DW is 82. I have been her primary caregiver since she was diagnosed three years ago. We live in rural Western PA. Between our prior marriages we have 8 kids. They all live far away, the closest is her daughter who lives fours away. She is in stage 5. I have had to take over all the finances, medications, meal…
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don't know what to say to DW
I visited DW yesterday at her MCF, and it was pretty disheartening. I managed to record a bunch of our conversation and transcribe it. The key points: * She asks why she is there, what changed between us? * Why didn't I talk to her about the change? * Why don't I want to be with her? * Is there someone else? * What's the…
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I'm Hitting My Limit
I am so lost right now and really need to vent. I don't know that I can take the complaints, shadowing and delusions anymore. Perhaps it's because I keep hoping for something back, even though I know my DW can't offer anything back. I feel like a complete failure in this caregiving and wonder what kind of person I am that…
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Declining mobility and VD
There are so many on this site with much bigger issues than mine and farther along on the journey. DH has VD after several strokes in his parietal lobe. He has executive function issues, receptive and ecpressive language defecits but very little problem with memory. He can still do his ADLs but is declining physically at a…
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Not recognizing home
I am writing on behalf of my DB. His DW has had a very fast decline in the last 10 months and now not able to to do tasks around the house such as cooking or cleaning but still able to basically do her ADL’s. She all of a sudden is accusing him of moving them to a new place without her being consulted. This is a house they…
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The lack of help is wearing me out
I have a caregiver that comes for 4 hours a week and am supposed to have another for another 4 hours. It is not enough. I need a break. His family shows up once or twice a year for a few days. Still no break. Now I am hosting guests. My parents come and get him out of the house and make decisions for me like dinner etc.…
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Slowing progression of disease
I keep hearing that there are meds that can slow the progression of this disease but I wonder if that's only for those who are diagnosed early? At this point, I wouldn't want to have my DH stuck in this stage any longer than necessary. The anxiety, confusion, anger... if doctor recommends one of these new meds is it ok for…
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I Am Bringing Him Home
Update: I’m sitting here in his MC room waiting for the ambulance to come bring my DH home. He’s on day 26 of not eating, day 10 of refusing all of his meds (he has significant heart issues), and day 3 of less than 8 oz of fluids/day. He’s terrified about being left alone, even for just a few minutes, so I’ve been here…
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Regressing
DH with ALZ…he has forgotten not only that he loves bbq ribs but also how to eat them. It suddenly occured to me that there have been a number of clues that his eating habits have regressed to early childhood. He now cuts all his foods …asparagus, long green beans, meats…into bite size pieces before eating. I asked him…
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The most heartbreaking moment yesterday
My DW is stage 7, she hasn't been able to do anything for herself in years. She has to be hand fed, rolled over ever two hours, she's skin and bones and everything else that comes with it. She is in MC and I visit her everday to make sure she's comfortble, warm, hydrated. . . Because of the type of dementia she has, LBD,…
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Husband newly diagnosed (55yo) - treatment?
First post! We're waiting for an appt with a neurologist to pursue next steps (blood, MRI showed no issues, mental tests showed decline). I wanted to ask here how long it took for your loved one to start any sort of treatment. So far we've gotten the "see you in 6 months" talk, but no talk of starting any treatment, other…
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Worried
Taking my DH on a 2 hrs trip. He has VD and Alz. Early stages but has lots of anxiety. I so worried first time this far from home. There will be about 30 people there( all my famil). Just making me sorta nervous. Oh well gonna try might be the last time I see some of my aunts and uncles.
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Just need my friends who understand
My DH spent two years in MC, and I was able to bring him home 3 months ago with relatively good success. He's on hospice now, which has also helped. I mentioned in an earlier post that he's suddenly taken a nosedive as far as behaviors and cognition. He shuffles around the house mumbling disconnected words. He's resistant…
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Time
About a year or so ago my neighbor referred to me as my husbands caregiver and I was very insulted. Now as I sit here looking at the man I have loved for 35 years, I wonder when exactly I crossed that line and why I am feeling that loss so strongly tonight.
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Med taking is a constant fight.
Hi y'all it has been a while since I have posted. As I write this post I am in tears. I am 40 yo taking care of my LO who has EOA and is 46 the Dr said he is stage 7b. I am on the struggle bus like no other today. A few weeks ago he had a siezure that I didn't know could happen at this stage for no reason and no history of…
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DH dashing through stage 6 benchmarks
DH, early stage six AD, has been home from memory care for about 2-1/2 months after a year-long stay. It's generally been going well until the last two or three weeks. He's started sundowning again after a long break, very agitated, 'hyper-oral' per Tam Cummings, hallucinating other people in the house/yard, starting fecal…
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Expected but still hurts
AD has its moments. The first time it tore a hole in my heart was when I realized my husband had no memory of how we met or our wedding. Today, another big hurt came. We sat down to dinner and my husband looked me in a confused fusion. “Where is my wife? ” he asked. So hard sometimes.
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Bad Doctor Experiences?
I’m sure, given our ages (my LO is 37, turning 38 in July), I probably have more than my fair share of these kinds of stories—and they are awful. I wouldn’t wish them on anyone. That said… misery sure does love company. We finally got in to see a neurologist—an appointment that was originally scheduled for January but I…
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DW Waking up 3 AM
First time on this Forum. Some background my wife was diagnosed with EO Alzheimer when she was 58. Now 6 years later she has lost her ability to communicate, self care, and starting to have trouble walking. I am her sole caregiver (married 38 yr) and basically have to do everything like feeding, bathing, dressing.and…
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New and need advice
My husband is 55. I am 56. He was a middle school Math teacher and then elementary school principal. I am a former high school History teacher. Before teaching, he served in the Navy and suffered a Traumatic Brain Injury as well as exposure to chemicals that brought on a rare form of Dercum's Disease (an auto-immune…
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Hates the caregiver
Hello, DH is 72 with vascular dementia (most likely). I work full time and don't want to retire. I have a companion with him all day while I am gone. This is 4 days per week with his brother and sister taking a day. He is very confused and thinks his brother is really a dead friend masquerading as his brother. He…
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Behavior changes
my 63 yo husband was diagnosed appx 1 year ago with early onset Alzheimer’s. Question…when I notice a change in his behavior should I point it out to him (when he acts in a different of aggressive way)? Also he has picked up a new habit…humming! Is that “normal”?
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FREE legal and financial tool
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DH with dementia keeps saying he is scared.....
My DH with dementia - I think late stage 5 or early stage 6, keeps telling me that he is scared. He will actually be shaking with fear sometimes, but he can't tell me what he is afraid of. I reassure him that I am gong to take care of him, but he is still frightened. It happens sometimes when we are walking down a hall and…