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What do I do?
I am not sure where to start… I waited a year for DH to have an MRI. The results mention the word dementia but all the other medical language concludes with “not significant “ . We have not seen the neurologist yet. That is two months away. His behaviors continue to be concerning. He didn’t know how to use a credit card at…
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Just need to talk to my friends (213)
Morning, welcome to December! Carl and Ron, it's 32 here, mostly drizzle but it's icy in Tulsa and snow North of there. Lots of accidents and backups in Tulsa. If you get out today, please be careful. I have no plans to be out, maybe on the front porch to feed the birds. I saw a few on the porch looking for food yesterday.…
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donepezil
My HWD has been taking donepezil for over a year…he refused to take it over the weekend because he said that his dr told him to stop (not true) and that I didn't know what I was talking about and was trying to poison him. I messaged our doctor (unfortunat
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Asking for tips on how to get LO to drink lots of water for radiation
My LO w/dementia is about to start radiation for prostate cancer. He remembers that he had surgery 5 years ago, so doesn't understand why he needs radiation now. He will need to drink 25 oz of water in 10 minutes before radiation, and it's a struggle to get him to drink that much in an entire day. I got the okay for him to…
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In Home care
I had in home care through an agency three days a week while I was at work but our caregiver left to work somewhere else so the agency lined us with a new one after a few no shows. Anyway, it was not a good fit. Resulted in the police being called, my DH was aggressive towards her and left the house walking towards the…
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Concern about potential surgery
My DW has a condition that may require a hysterectomy or other type of surgery to correct a pelvic prolapse. I'm terrified that the surgery may accelerate her decline. To this point, nearly 5 years, she has done very well. We are still having a good life and she is happy as am I, although I live every day if fear of the…
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A series of changes and more isolation for me as sole caregiver
This is just me expressing feelings the only way I can right now. This week has been challenging. My husband's Medicaid application was approved, but the part that funds home and community based services is still pending. I applied in August, and I was told that it will probably be February before we actually get any…
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Hope or Cope?
We finally got an "official" diagnosis on Monday - "amnestic MCI with concern for Alzheimer's." DH's next steps are a PET Scan, bloodwork, and another MRI. Now, I just keep swaying between hope for a "cure" (improvement) and acceptance of the diagnosis. Do we fight the disease or do we learn how to live with it? I…
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Alone This Holiday?
I am just curious how many others of you are spending holidays alone. Our children’s rotation is to in-laws this year. We normally get an invitation from friends to at least one holiday gathering but no invitations this year. I can’t help but conclude that it is because we are becoming more and more isolated because of…
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I'm a widow now
My DH passed away 12/10/25 at a hospice house. Thank you to everyone on this message board for your advice and caring support.
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DW probably needs surgery
I have posted before about this but, I am terrified about my DW having surgery. She's probably about mid stage 4 and still doing pretty well. It appears that she may need a surgery. There are two options. One would require about a 4 hour surgery and the other likely more like 2 hours. I'm so concerened about how this might…
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Any Advice for Stopping MCI Progression
What advise do you have for stopping MCI progression to Alzheimer’s? Has anyone on this site found anything that keeps this from progressing? My husband’s MCI is stable at this point, and we want to keep it that way. We are using Brain HQ online games, are on a plant based diet, exercise, and are doing everything else that…
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What do you say to LO who is experiencing Hallucinations/delusions?
When my DH has hallucinations, talks about the people sitting around our house (just he and I live here) what should I do? What should I say. I mean, I've said to him that this is "our" home and no one is here but us. He gets mad and tells me that I'm trying to say he's crazy and that I'm planning on putting him in a…
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Preventing outbursts
Greetings, I am in need of ideas to prevent outbursts and/or stopping them. My DH has been prone to outbursts prior to this terrible disease. I am feeling more like he is the hammer and I am the nail. It is just the two of us and our 2 sweet dogs. Thank you in advance.
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Move forward with hip surgery for DH?
I'm still not positive what stage my DH is in, but guessing stage 4 with some symptoms on 5 creeping in. Some days he seems close to "normal" and then there are days that are the opposite. He's still able to care for himself and even fixes dinner for us now and again. Still does his usual chores around the house. Withthat…
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Emergency Respite Care
Hello! I’ve been a longtime member here but haven’t checked in for several months. I wanted to share my recent experience with my own emergency situation and what happened with DH. Although he was diagnosed in 2013, he’s been declining very quickly during the past year and a half. He’s probably very late stage 6. He…
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At peace
My DH is at peace. I held his hand as he took his last breaths listening to Chopin and the Lords Prayer at 3am this morning in bed at home. I am grateful that I was awake to say “I love you” as he took his final breaths. The end came quickly after he lost his ability to swallow any liquid three days ago. His last words to…
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Christmas gratuities
I am wondering if anyone feels they should give a Christmas gift or gratuity to any of your caregivers? We have a person who has been with us over a year, and comes weekly for 4 hours. She brings us cookies— but I'm not sure I should reciprocate. She is well paid for her time.
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Hospice opinions
I put my DW on hospice about 5 o 6 weeks ago. I’m glad I did but I’m curious about people’s experiences. I’m a retired engineer so I know I can be a pain. But I feel like my primary nurse, although knowledgeable, is a little all over the place sometimes. I also have a hard time with the doctor, who will never meet my wife,…
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Stage 5
My DH is now stage 5 cognitively and memory wise. He is still able to attend to his personal care. Our specialist said this stage can last 6 years….can you share your experience in terms length of time and behaviors? DH has had a couple of angry outbursts where he kicks us out the house, no recognition of me for over 6…
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How will I get through this
Hubby 78 diagnosed in august with amnestic mild cognitive impairment. Memory not good with paying bills or remembering what day it is. Asks all day long what’s today. He still drives and driving is fine. Goes to gym every day. Reads. Doesn’t follow tv shows so good and irritable. So irritating I want to leave. Im still…
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Dementia and Personality Disorders
I know there are many of us here who deal w persons w difficult personalities and dementia. I saw this Dr. Natalie video and wanted to share. My DH doesn't have a diagnosed PD or diagnosed dementia but he sure does "quack like a duck." 😁 Im sorry it isnt hyperlinked. I never seem to be able to get it pasted that way!…
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Awkward and Embarrassing
I am asking folks on this platform for advice on how to handle a spouse who no longer speaks with a filter, seems unable to "read the room", and says embarrassing things in public. I understand that my spouse is no longer the woman I married almost 50 years ago, and she is not to blame for the disease that controls her…
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Very interesting book
I almost hesitate to put this out there but decided to do so as I see improvements in my DH since starting him on this program. “Alzheimer’s Disease What if there is a Cure?” by Mary T Newport, MD is a very interesting read. I started following her suggestions with coconut oil and MCT oil on November 11th and have…
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Facebook and DH _ no way to delete my post??
I had already posted about this in the past, but can't seem to see a way to delete a post? My DH is in stage 4 going into 5, a year after alz diagnosis. He's still able to care for his daily needs and does many routine chores on his own. He's been on Facebook since 2019 and enjoys reading posts and posting his own things.…
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Drumming in his sleep
My DH is at moderate stage 5 and sleeps well through the night. He went to sleep at 7:30 this evening. In his sleep, from about 11:15pm to 11:30pm, he started a very fast, vigorous rhythmical drumming with his finger tips on the wall behind his head, lasting from 3 to 25 seconds each and less than a minute apart. My quick…
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Christmas tree
With all the issues there are to deal with, this seems so very trivial. But, maybe someone here has some wisdom for me. I used to LOVE putting up the Christmas tree. It was almost a "ceremony" for me, with holiday music playing and every single ornament being hung on the tree. Window swags, candles, a village of ceramic…
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What Is Respite?
I’m so tired from 24 hours and going of aimless, but harmless, wandering, but, but… Today I have a caregiver for three hours. DW is accepting of her today. My respite is the garage door up with a soft rain, sitting in a lawn chair with the door into the garage locked so my DW stays with the caregiver, sitting here…
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Companionship for the caregiver
I live in MA and for the last 3 plus years as my wife’s condition has continued to worsen the isolation has become overwhelming. I need social contact, adult conversation. I cannot be alone with this struggle and my hope is to connect with a woman who may be experiencing issues and to at some point meet for lunch, coffee…
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Hospice
It has happened. My DW has qualified for hospice. She lost 12 lbs in the last two months and can’t bathe herself anymore. That’s why she qualified, not because she is 6 months from dying or anything. Thought that might help some folks to know. Honestly though, I don’t see her making it to 2027. I am both a wreck and…