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Welcome! New Forum for Caregivers
This is a new discussion forum for caregivers supporting a parent living with Alzheimer's or other dementia.
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Cataract surgery
Mom is probably to the end of stage 4. She was diagnosed with vascular dementia 2 years ago. I was told average life expectancy is 5 years. I know that’s just a rough number. She has diabetes with edema in her legs. I don’t think she could follow a storyline to read a book. She is able to choose her meals off the menu at…
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Selling Mom's Home Using POA When She Seems Lucid
I have three siblings and one lives fifteen minutes away from my mom. I live in another state but manage all her finances and anything else I can to take the load off our sibling who lives locally. When I agreed to be my mom's power of attorney, I naively thought it would only come into play for her finances. However, this…
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I'm new to this group
My mom is 91 and has had Dementia for almost 5 yrs. She moved in with me 1 1/2 yrs ago. She fell 2 mos ago and didn't break any bones but was badly bruised, in pain and had to be in a wheelchair. From the ER she was admitted into a PT Rehab. That was awful because they were not for memory care patients and mom couldn't…
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Father driving me CRAZY
My father has early dementia with no short term memory. He is constantly asking me over and over to help him with the computer. He is driving me batshit crazy. It is so annoying and I can't take it anymore. He doesn't know what he is doing on the computer and every time I suggest a way to make it better he just keeps going…
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Moved mom to AL on Monday and now (Wednesday) she's in a psych ward
I'm horrified and don't know what to do (or what's even possible.) Sorry this is long, I need someone somewhere to understand the history of this since no one has asked us before (or after) committing her. My mom started having memory issues around 2020 but wasn't officially diagnosed with AD until this past January.…
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Mom has auditory hallucinations need help
My 96 year old mom has alzheimers and recently has been having auditory hallucinations - she hears the same part of a song over and over ( i can't id the song). this started about 6 weeks ago for 1 day, then again a month later the 14 days later and then 4 days later. it really upsets her. she thinks its coming from a…
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How to move from assisted living to memory care
My mom has been living in AL almost 2 years after difficult move out to California from Michigan. She did well the first year, but then AL decided to renovate and the disruption triggered fear. She’s 77 years old and was diagnosed with likely dementia, has aphasia and recently has been having auditory hallucinations. She’s…
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Where do I start?
My 63 yr old father has just been diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. He has not been told yet. He is still driving, but recently got in an accident and also lapsed his insurance. Anyway I don’t know where to start with telling him and planning and preparing for the future. What makes it harder is he only has an iq of 74 and lacks…
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DPOA ignored at mental hospital
disregard. found answer.
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Trouble getting mom to shower
My mom has dementia but it's still early onset. The two things I'm having problems with is getting her to change out of her PJs and getting her to shower. She said she doesn't get dirty bc all she does is sit in a chair. What can I do?
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Incontinence
My mom currently lives in an assisted living community with my dad and struggles with incontinence. She is asked on a regular basis if she has to use the bathroom, always saying no, then will have an accident 5 minutes later. I truly believe she doesn't know she has to go, but I don't know how help her and my dad. We got a…
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I’m so lost - mother is 90, English is a second language
I am so lost. My father recently passed away - somewhat unexpectedly - and, as an only child, am left to care for my 90 year old mother. I had not realized just how bad her short-term memory loss had gotten (dad never said) and I suspect she has onset dementia, She refuses to talk to a doctor or anyone about her mental…
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Mom is afraid to stay alone with Dad
Hi, my Dad has dementia. I think he's in the middle stages (gets angry, hallucinates, thinks the bank is stealing from him). Couple of days he had an episode and woke up at 3:30 a.m. Left the house and told my mom if she doesn't move, he will hit her. Thank God my aunt was there and went after him. He returned but was…
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Mom and Dad with Alzheimer’s
About a year ago, my mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s. Last week, so was my dad. They live independently together about 15 minutes from me, my husband and our 15 year old son. We knew something was wrong long before Dad’s diagnosis…but by the time we got his cooperation and finally got him to a doctor as a new patient,…
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Top of stairs gate
Hi Everyone! This is my first post. I live with my mom. She has moderate to severe AD. We will be living in a home with stairs. Any suggestions on keeping her upstairs, while we all sleep? I have read a 42” gate is appropriate. Any help would be greatly appreciated! Thank you.
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Anyone have any luck with washable adult diapers?
Hello, Few hours till 2025 here in the east coast, but Alzheimer's doesn't care. It goes on. We're spending a fortune on adult diapers as my LO pees constantly throughout the day given the special nutrition therapy she's on. It keeps her hydrated and well-nourished, and calm, but… it makes her pee constantly. Changing 5 or…
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Advice on phone calls
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Therapist or counsellor
Hi there, my wife’s mother was diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer’s. She is understandably finding it emotionally tough. Could anyone recommend a therapist who specialises in this (for my wife)? Many thanks in advance
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How often do you visit?
I made the mistake of visiting my mom (every other day) the first time she was placed in a nursing home. It just kept her from acclimating and each time I visited her she thought I was taking her home. It was doing her more harm than good. So, this time around (I took her out of the nursing home but had to put her back in…
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Mom isn't talking to me
Hi, I'm new to this. Mom was diagnosed earlier this year with stage 3 Alzheimer's. I was caregiving for her. I had to stop because it was affecting my mental health. Mom is mad and hasn't talked to me for several months. I use to talk to her every morning. Has anyone else experienced this? How did you deal with this? Did…
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Downsizing from Assisted Living to Memory Care
My FIL is currently in a one-bedroom apartment in assisted living. Unfortunately, his dementia has progressed to the point where it is time for him to transition to memory care in the same facility. (In addition to general decline, he has become combative and aggressive.) His memory care room will be much smaller than his…
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Reappearance of distanced siblings
My Father was diagnosed with VD with onset AL 4 years ago. I took over as POA due to a broken unrepairable bridge between my Sister the former POA, and Dad. I've learned so much about their former relationship in the last 4 years and frankly, I wish I woud have found out sooner in order to rescue Dad. She kept him in the…
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Rehab versus hospice
My 91 year old Mom is somewhere between late stage 5 and early stage 6. She was fairly stable for the past year, but I (and her caregivers in memory care) saw a precipitous decline over the past couple of months. She has completely lost her appetite and is eating very little. Even her former favorite sweets have no appeal.…
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Driving
So, Dad's been living with Vascular Dementia and the beginnings of Alzheimers since 2023. HIs short term memory is gone and his ability to cook is gone as well. With me myself and I as his POA, I pay his bills( I provoide him with his junk mail and solicitations) which he syas h e has to pay and sits it in a pile. When he…
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Did I Give Up Too Soon?
Following a violent outburst (mom attacked her in home caregiver) when she had a UTI, I made the difficult decision to place mom in MC. Tomorrow will be 2 weeks. She is more lucid than the other residents in her MC, but 'loops' verbally a lot, and it is clear that there's significant decline within the past 3 months. I am…
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Dealing with the 'loss' of my mother
Hi all. Very new to this. My mother (57) has just been officially diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's. We've been noticing it for the past 2 years, but only recently has she been given a diagnosis. Unfortunately, because of her age, it's progressing pretty rapidly. I'm pretty young (24) and just had my first daughter 2…
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Has anyone had to make the decision for their parent to move to assisted living?
Hi. I'm new here. My mom has been living w/dementia and officially diagnosed with Alzheimer's a few months ago. She lives alone in her own home but my sister who lives nearby has supposed to have been helping her out with routine things. (Sister lives 10 minutes away, is not working, is health care proxy and primary POA.)…
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Where do you find support?
I am caring for my mom who is only 74. She had an episode that resulted with her moving in with us while we get her into someplace more appropriate for her needs. Since coming to our home she has improved in many ways. Through this experience, I find that I am struggling to understand her diagnosis. The way that her…
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My mom refuses help
My mother has been in decline for about 10 years, probably, but we’ve only just started to notice major decline in the last few years. My mother refuses to get diagnosed and has been very stubborn with regard to accepting help from anyone other than her husband. And even with him she pushes back. Self-care has deteriorated…