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Welcome! New Forum for Caregivers
This is a new discussion forum for caregivers supporting a parent living with Alzheimer's or other dementia.
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Managing Early Stages
Good Morning from Michigan, I am the sole coordinator for my mom who is in "early" stages of Alzheimer's and recently moved to assisted living. My mom was overly independent for most of my life and this shift has been difficult for her as well as for me. I am trying to manage the constant contact over her hyper fixations…
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Spouse of Father In Denial about His Condition
My father has dementia that is progressing, currently mid-stage symptoms, and his wife is in denial about his condition. She does not believes he has dementia and insists he is improving. I live several states away. There are some family members nearby my parents and they have tried to reason with her regarding his…
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Education for Healthy Parent
Has anyone dealt with the healthy parent not understanding this disease ? My dad is primary caregiver for my mom. He can’t understand how to engage with her. My siblings and I have all tried to give tips, his friend who’s been through it gives him advice on deescalation but he doesn’t get it. He corrects her on facts that…
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New to this
Hello! This is the first time I have reached out about taking care of my Mom. She is diagnosed with Alzheimer's and probably has been dealing with it for about 2 or 3 years. She moved in with me back in January. She decided she just couldnt do it alone anymore. It has been a huge change for all of us. I have 2 adult…
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Dad needs care too, though.
Hey y'all! So my Dad is 82 and in relatively good health. My Mom is 80 and is in late state Alz. ( I think.) Her symptoms are a little different than some, in that she is unable to really hear…she can't see well…thank goodness, her attitude is usually upbeat and positive. However, she doesn't talk much now and when she…
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Father should be in nursing home but I can't do it
Hi - I have a father who keeps falling and going to the hospital. I think he would be better off in a nursing home. He also has dementia and no short term memory. My dilemma is he is absolutely 100% against going to a nursing home. He literally cried in front of me saying it is not what he wants to do. I have requested…
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Assisted Living vs. Memory Care
My mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s about 8 years ago. She is now 69 and is around stage 4/5. She is still living in independent living as her boyfriend visits almost daily and takes her to her doctor appointments and gets her out of her room for walks or lunch. I handle all of her finances, groceries and personal stuff.…
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Taking away her car
Help! I am having trouble taking away car from my mother . She started swerving in lanes, and ignored the driving rules constantly . She recently crashed into a parked car and that was enough for us to say no more driving for her :( tried hiding keys, she went crazy. Tried taking away the car, but she keeps asking every…
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Ruby's Choice
I had to spread the word on this movie I came across on Amazon Prime. Jane Seymour is the lead actress in this movie. She stars as the Mother and Grandmother who suffers from Dementia. Her husband passed years ago and she's been told that he's on a business trip. Without giving away too much, her memory loss is confirmed…
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Placement/Agitiation/Aggression
My father has MS dementia. He acted out against my mother a few weeks ago and he is currently under a doctor's care at a local hospital. The issue now is that no facility will take him if he is agitated/aggressive. He is under restraints at the hospital because he keeps attempting to take IVs/feeding lines out (he refuses…
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Can’t be pleased 😞
Coming here mostly to just vent. Mom has lived with us a little over a year now. Moved from one part of this BIG state to another after 40 years so BIG changes in every way. Left behind her bffs, the option to drive (her choice not to), the familiar, her own house, had to sell a lot of her things or put them into storage,…
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Question about Cognitive Reserve
I understand that a high level of cognitive reserve can make a person show fewer symptoms than others with the same level of brain deterioration. My question is this - does this mean they might be more advanced in the disease progression than their symptoms indicate? Is it possible that you think someone is stage 4 based…
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I’m Scared and Alone
My dad was diagnosed with MD about a year ago. When mom was alive (she passed from cancer about 3 years ago) she was already saying dad was headed down this path although he wasn’t diagnosed. I saw it too. I noticed dad was getting worse a little bit at a time. But still, at least I thought, was doing pretty well. A week…
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MI MADRE ESTÁ PERDIENDO LA MEMORIA
Hola, soy nueva, recién pude encontrar una página que puede ayudarme, mi mamá tiene 81 años, soy su única hija, empecé a notar que algo no andaba bien hace dos años, lamentablemente por mi trabajo me enviaron a una zona de dificil acceso, aunque bajo a verla los fines de semana solo disfruto 1 día con ella, he notado…
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How to truly block spam phone calls
My father has dementia and is eager to talk to every telemarketer. This has the phone ringing dozens of times a day, with him wasting lots of time talking to people selling services he doesn't need. Worse, the caller is sometimes a scammer, and Dad is gullible enough that he's given away his credit card and other sensitive…
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Missing my mom
I think my mom has dementia, but she's in denial. I've had concerns for the past 3-4 years, but she won't get assessed. I resigned myself to the fact that there would likely be some sort of crisis and hoped that she would be open to help then. The crisis happened in February when she attempted suicide by overdosing on…
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Mom needs almost constant support
79-year-old mom lives in intermediate memory care unit within AL facility. She is very outgoing and has a good friend in AL. She is able to interact with people in AL and participate in their activities. She does not seem to enjoy most of the activities, however, or refuses to try them. But then she gets bored and doesn’t…
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Bible Verse to Lift You Up 6/21/21
CAREGIVERS, WE CAN TRUST THE LORD Psalm 91:14-15 Easy-to-Read Version 14 The Lord says, “If someone trusts me, I will save them. I will protect my followers who call to me for help. 15 When my followers call to me, I will answer them. I will be with them when they are in trouble. I will rescue them and honor them. YOUR…
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Days Out for MC Resident?
My dad has been in MC for about a year and is now about stage 5/6. We have brought him to our house for a meal and a visit of a few hours most weekends in good weather (no overnights). Mostly this has been OK. He likes the food, and hosting him in our home gives me some sense of satisfaction. He has put up very little…
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Assisted living room changes
My mom has been at the assisted living facility since October 2023. She is in a 2-room apartment, which we originally selected due her having 2 senior male dogs. At this point, the dogs are no longer there, and my mom is transitioning from moderate to severe. I was asked by the staff at the facility today how I would feel…
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Diagnosis process
Hello all, I was able to get my mother to be seen by a neuropsychologist for testing recently, which required very careful persuasion and lying to get her there. They now want to make an appointment to go over the results with her. I am considering not doing this and having them just send me the report, if I can get it. My…
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Having trouble crying? Then read this one: The Swimmers by Julie Otsuka
I haven't been on this site for a long time and was moved to post here by this book. Brilliantly written and tightly constructed, Julie takes us on the journey of her mom through her mom's decline. I think it was by chapter 3, I was sobbing, and then weeping at the description of the importance of trees. (I remember how my…
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Hospital woes (long story)
Mom developed another UTI at her MC. After a day of antibiotics, she refused all food, fluids and meds and stopped talking. Her facility sent her to ER and she was admitted. After some IV fluids and one dose of IV antibiotics, she perked up and was almost back to baseline. The hospital was ready to discharge her, but of…
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Alzheimer’s and Sugar
My MIL is diagnosed with Alzheimer’s Disease. The disease has progressed slowly (15 years), but she is now firmly in Stage 4. Among other changes in behavior, she has recently begun hoarding food…especially sweet foods. While I know hoarding and hiding is typical, my question is more about her overall diet. My FIL is her…
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Managing care
Hello, first post here. I am my dad's daughter and medical/durable POA. He has mid-stage LBD. He is physically pretty healthy except for chronic UTIs which we finally have managed. He is in a wonderful RCF with a nurse on staff and loving caregivers that adore him. But lately it seems like so many little things are…
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One parent diagnosed, one parent…
MY MIL has been diagnosed with a very slow progression of Alzheimer’s. She was diagnosed 15 years ago and is just now reaching Stage 4. By the time the evening arrives, you can definitely see a change not only in reasoning/processing but also in personality. Her husband of the past 40 years is her PCG. He’s a terrific man,…
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Taking care of my Mom
My Mom has Dementia, still living home with my dad, and I go to their home every day to help them. She accuses my dad that he is having sex with a 13 year old girl along with me and my 2 other sisters. Some days she is good then other days really off the wall. I get very upset because I protect my dad. I know I shouldn’t…
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Spectrum
Hello, I am a caregiver to an elderly parent. We are in Peterborough, ON. Canada. I am finding it more and more frustrating because my life is on hold. My mother is 92 yrs, and at times appears to be very sharp ("with it") but she does forget a lot, more and more, and I see signs of decline. It is quite challenging because…
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New Here. Sundowner/Hallucinations
My mom cares for my dad at home. I am only 2 miles away and my son and I are their support system. My dad (89yr) has been dealing with sundowners for several months but it is getting worse. Some nights he sleeps ok and some nights he is up and down throughout the night. We learned my mom (84yr) has been sleeping in a…
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Seeking Advice: Managing Toilets with Dementia Behaviors
My father has late-stage dementia and is exhibiting challenging behaviors that are making it difficult to maintain our home. He’s been pouring food down the toilets, which has caused clogs and damage. He also removed the bolts from one toilet, breaking the wax seal, and it’s now unusable. He’s fixated on guarding the…