Caring for a Parent

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This is a new discussion forum for caregivers supporting a parent living with Alzheimer's or other dementia.

My dad is now living in assisted living because he was recently diagnosed with early/mild dementia. Prior to living in assisted living he was a very active person, with exercising. reading, a couple of clubs that he was part of, traveling and so on. I am trying help come up with activities that he can do while at the…

Please help. We moved our mom from assisted living to memory care (within the same facility) a little over 2 weeks ago. She wasn't functioning great in AL in terms of her ability to engage in activities, go on the errand trips, etc. But she was happy. She would walk around the building, say hello and chat with people and…

Hi- I feel like I am in a situation with multiple circumstances and need advice. My mom is in middle to late stage dementia. She currently lives at home with her husband but needs more care. I am in the final stages of signing her up for memory care. Most days mom does not see that she needs to move and says she won’t do…

Hello all, I am a secondary caregiver to my mother who is approaching stage 4 ALZ pretty quickly. She is on her 6th round of Kisunla, so the constant supervision requirement has lessened, but the doctor is telling us that she is still needing supervision due to the ALZ, but not super specific on what that means exactly. My…

I wanted to share this book title with you all. I'm not "promoting" it, but I'm just now reading it for a 2nd time. The first time, my mom didn't have ALZ yet, so this time around I have a new perspective. Kat Dreenan is my cousin. Her book is based on her own true story with her mom. What is really interesting, is that…

I think Mom has Alzheimers. She has seen a neurologist. He said maybe Alzheimers. Do some Doctors not tell people they have Alzheimers. She has had numerous tests including an EEG. A lot of times Mom keeps thinking someone else in the house. Mom fell last week. I called EMTs. They helped her get up and get her to bed. The…

Just felt like sharing, it's so therapeutic, thank you for this platform. My mom, 91, mid to mod (more moderate) ALZ (for 3 years), lives in AL, without added support, but they keep an eye on her and she's not allowed to leave the building without family. She lives in an apartment with pull cord for emergencies by bed and…

I am not questioning the need for Memory Care. My mom, with ALZ, is still in AL, but I am trying to be prepared for when MC is needed. I read a lot of sad posts like dbarrylewis on When to Reconsider Memory Care and it was very emotional and sad, and it made me wonder if anyone has experienced a positive outcome. Having to…

Hi everyone. My father was recently diagnosed with mild, beginning-stage dementia. My sisters and I just transitioned him into an assisted living facility. Physically, he’s doing well and can still manage his daily routines (ADLs) independently, but his memory loss becomes really noticeable whenever he gets tired or…

My heart breaks every time I read many of these posts. I am grateful to be a part of this group, it really helps me too, but it is heartbreaking and also scary wondering what is in store for me and my mom down the road. My mom, (age 91, mild-mod ALZ, living in AL, not MC) has had her difficulties and I've learned so many…

My father is mid-stage Alzheimer's at 73. He still lives at home with mom, and we are finding that to be the most comfortable and best situation at the moment. He goes to an adult day care a few days a week while my mom is working. My mom's schedule is going to change soon and there are 1-2 days per week when she needs to…

Hello, I'm new to this community but hoping someone has some good insight on this... My mom has Alzheimer's and still lives on her own but her short term memory is quite bad. She is falling out of bed in the middle of the night and has no memory of it. She has hit her head each time and has head, neck and back pain from…

Thank you for the kind words and support on my earlier discussion post. Monday and Tuesday was at my wits end with Dad. Yesterday and today he has been better. I plan to go to a local Alzheimer's support group the 27th. I also talked to my PCP. My sister is another story, I explained to her I need emotional support and she…

My FIL can meet most of his ADL's except for an occasional bathroom accident and dressing correctly. He can feed himself but we have to fix his plate for him and lately he seems to have issues maybe figuring out silverware, we have noticed him using his fingers more. IADL's are another story, as far as I can tell he can't…

Last summer both of my parents were diagnosed with dementia. My mother’s is clearer (slowly progressing Alzheimers), my father’s seemed to come out of nowhere - and with a vengeance. Though my dad was diagnosed with moderate dementia, he refused additional testing. What turned out to be a lifesaver is that prior to the…

My mom has had memory issues for years and was diagnosed with Alzheimers more than a year ago (mid stage at that point). At the time she was living independently with my dad, he was also struggling with COPD and an undetermined kind of dementia. His was fast moving, changed his personality, and ultimately ended his life.…

Dad is being overwhelmed with scam phone calls and no matter how hard both his caregivers and I try, we can only block so many numbers and interfere with so many calls. His donating to these "charities" is getting out of hand. I've been working with the bank to try and keep these charges to a minimum without actually…

Sometimes we just have to find the humor in some of the ridiculousness this disease causes. The saga we have gone through with my mom surrounding her bed is just so off the wall, it's funny. She has complained about her various beds for years and years, blaming her back pain on every single one of them. She got a new…

Hello All, My Mom was diagnosed with Alzheimer's a few years back and has been getting worse. She was just diagnosed with lung cancer and we are looking into treatments/options to take. So my dilemma is, what is quality of life in the up coming few years? Any thoughts on how long till she is unable to care for herself, or…

Hello, Our neuro office sent over a RX for a Full Time Social Worker/Caregiver for my MIL. It states at her residence and diagnosis-g30-Alzheimers. They didn't however, explain what next steps are. Does this mean they are suggesting full time care for her? Do I start now with her Insurance? How does one find a good social…

UGH. I'm so tired of dealing with this immaturity! My mom has been having lots of back pain, but she refuses any sort of medical help for it, aside from Tylenol. As is common with AL, medications, including OTC, are not allowed in her room and must be dispensed by the staff. She knows this, she understands this, and she…

Tonight my spouse and I went to visit my 92-year-old dad in MC and had dinner with him. All was fine until it wasn’t. After the meal he grew increasingly agitated and wanted me to call his mother and see if we could stop by and visit her for a while tonight. What was surprising is that despite all efforts at redirection,…

Parent refuses to wear disposable briefs/diapers Any recommendations?

How are you guys keeping your parents engaged? I cannot watch my mother all the time and I find that she needs constant interaction.

Mom moving into late stage. She’s been on hospice over a year (gets really good care!) and is not depressed or anxious. But she is progressing. If I bring treats I now sometimes (often) have to feed them to her. It hurts to type this. Any advice on getting through these layer stages? I can’t just check out, but being with…

Hi, I am looking for support on finding in home care for my dad once or twice a week and how to navigate it financially. He is not on Medicare and early onset. My parents also most likely would not qualify for free services but cannot afford most private pay places. I am trying to find something in the middle near bucks…

Generally, when I post it is not positive. For about a week my mother has been cognizant, has not been frantically looking for either "mother" or her deceased sister. When that gets too intense we have had to medicate her. She has only gotten up once or twice during the night. Is not sleeping 20 hours a day. It is almost…

Hello, My name is Mark. My mother is in Stage 4/5 (my assesment based on a Behavioral Assesment Tool from Dr. Tam Cummings). My mother lives in Texas and lives with my little sister. I live in Virginia and my other sister (middle) lives in Washington. My mother and sister have lived together for 30 yrs and very…

How do I help get my dad back in the right sleep pattern when he is sundowning. All week he is has been going to be at 10 pm, and waking up anywhere between 1230 and 430. He is not getting good sleep or quality sleep as far as that goes. He has vascular dementia along with a slew of other health issues.

My mom is a hoarder! She lives in a nursing home with a roommate she really likes. It is almost impossible to get anything out of her room. My brother gave her popcorn in a tin for Christmas-she wants to keep the tin, she even saves empty single serve chip bags (no idea what that’s about), she saves all the cups they give…