You're gonna think I'm crazy, but where are we?

Ed1937

That's what she said right after breakfast. I told her we were in our home, and I told her the address. She said "I still don't know where we are. What is around here that I should know something about?" I told her Strack and Van Til's, a large grocery store, was about 6 or 7 blocks north of us, and the Corner Cafe was about that far on the main street of our town. She said nothing more. But she did not seem to be confused at all. She knew where the rooms were in the house, and talked about what was happening in our country now. She had no trouble with speech, which she usually does. This disease is weird!

eaglemom

Your correct Ed, this disease is weird. I think you handled it perfectly. Did you ever go someplace for an extended stay. South of the winter or something like that? Could she have been referring to that?

You handled it. See how the rest of the day progresses. Remember about those UTI's that cause our LO's such problems.

eagle

Crushed

Best story about my mother with Vascular dementia .  I got a call on my cell phone from my mother (an accomplishment all by itself.) 

 She was sobbing Im lost I dont know where I am

I said "Mom I can see from your number you are in in your apartment at assisted living."
 
 I described her apartment (in suburban Maryland) and told her  she was just fine.

She Said you must come over right now and help me  
 
I said Mom you've called my Cell phone.  I'm not home I'm in Madison Wisconsin 

Long pause ..... My mother is a native New Yorker ....  finally she says

Well I don't know where I am but Madison is a long way from EVERYWHERE 
 

When we told the doctors they said that confirmed the vascular dementia since  no one with Alzheimer's could make a joke like that

Ed1937

Thanks, eagle. She did the same thing about a month or so ago. I feel comfortable saying I'm pretty sure it is not a UTI because she just saw the urologist a few days ago, and got a clean bill of health. Also pretty sure there is not another place that she is thinking of, but I guess that's a possibility. Who knows? My guess is that it's just progression, even though weird.

billS

My wife often thinks she is in a foreign country while at the same time recognizing our house and property. The other day she asked me if she needed a passport to walk down to the neighbor's house!?? She sometimes remarks how strange it is that our house and belongings are here in this new place, and wonders how "they" are able to move everything from our home to here. Makes my head hurt to think about what must be going on in her brain.

jfkoc

crushed.....Oh, how I love and understand your mother's remark...Madison is not the only place that is a long way from everywhere!

abc123

Ed, I think of her often. What stage do you think she's in? I hope y'all have a peaceful day.

Ed1937

Thank you. It's hard for me to tell what stage she is in. Most of the time she seems to be too high functioning (and too much "with it") to be very far into it, while other times I think she might be stage 6. So my guess would be 5 - 6. She had problems with UTIs, that really put her over the edge. But they seem to be pretty well under control now, after seeing the urologist.

CStrope

@Crushed, I'm an hour west of Madison so I'm really a long way from everywhere!

JulieB46

I have been reading a lot of posts and they mention UTIs.  Is there something with dementia that makes them more prevalent?

JulieB46

Also, my husband has started asking me almost daily, "who lives here?" or " Is this our house?"

"I can't believe this is our house".  We have lived here for 14 years.

Quilting brings calm

Julie

It could be.  UTIs can be caused by not drinking enough water, not emptying the bladder fully. Etc.  someone with dementia won’t remember to drink enough water etc. 

However the reason you see UTIs mentioned so much is the effect having them does to the dementia symptoms.  One of the main symptoms  of a UTI in a person with dementia is an immediate increase in the dementia symptoms.  My LO was probably at a stage 3 ( mild cognitive decline), and a severe misdiagnosed UTI had us ( and doctors) thinking she needed to go straight to a nursing home at a stage  6 level.  Once we got her diagnosed and treated, she’s at a dementia stage 4 17 months later. 

Crushed

CStrope wrote:

@Crushed, I'm an hour west of Madison so I'm really a long way from everywhere!

I once flew into Central Wisconsin airport to speak at Sentry insurance.  I asked the lady at Avis for directions.  She said  go to the traffic light , turn left onto Interstate 39 first  big building on your left.   Perfect directions , what she did not say was that it was 21 miles !!

Ed1937

JulieB46 wrote:

I have been reading a lot of posts and they mention UTIs.  Is there something with dementia that makes them more prevalent?

It is not uncommon for people with dementia to be lacking in hygiene. If they get that way, and most do, that could be a big problem causing UTIs. And, of course, Quilting is right with what she said about staying hydrated and emptying ones bladder.

ElaineD

Older people are prone to UTIs because they lose the 'thirst' sensation.  By the time they are thirsty they may be a 'quart low'!

I have a dryness syndrome which increases my thirst, and STILL I don't really WANT to drink.  I know I should, I have water with me at all times, and yet I have to force myself to drink rather than sip.

It is  really weird, but I'm 78, almost 79, and I can tell you that it is hard for me to drink enough.

One check is to pinch the skin on the top of your hand.  If it takes several seconds (or any seconds, really) to smooth out, you are low on fluids.

Also, incontinence pads and 'pull ups' provide a pathway from rectal bacteria to the urethra.  Even if you can't see fecal material, bacteria may be present.

It is expensive to keep changing the pads/pull ups, but see if that reduces the incidence of UTIs.

Elaine

piozam13

DH used to ask, 'where are we', when he got up in the morning.  I felt he was confused, disoriented and scared.  I don't know what was really going on in his mind - but sometimes he would say, 'everything is foggy'.  Had this something to do with dawndowning/

grandma-J

One day my aunt asked me, "Am I dead?"

I didn't answer right away, so she prodded me with: "I would want to know."

I told her she wasn't dead. I told her she was 90 years old.

Hearing she was old was always very calming for her.  Being old explained symptoms that were otherwise inexplicable.

She's gone now. Remembering that conversation ("Am I dead?") makes me smile.