I'd like cheese with my whine please.

GMGYPSY

    OMG  this is soo hard.  I think he is in pain and all I can do is drug him into oblivion. He is very agitated  so, I'm giving him Morphine , and Lorazapam (for aggitation and Haladol for halucinations.

 Up till now we have struggled to get to the toilet and fight to get the depends  down  and me wishing it was easier to get them down.  Now  he pulls the depends  down  anywhere and everywhere and pees on the hospital bed, and on his  chair  it would be so much easier if he went in the depends.  Careful what you wish for.  The chair goes to the dump when this is over. 

  So we both sleep in the living room , him in the hospital bed and me in my chair.  It has been two weeks since I've slept 5 hrs straight.  He still can almost stand up and stagger around but not without me physically man handeling him around , .  Admittedly, I am cranky with him.    So I have figured that rather than bear hugging him around the room I now move the bed to him  so all I have to do is  stand him up and body check him into the bed. Which is scary for him. It's become hard for him to sid down backwards .   

    It's killing me seeing him so miserable. , and I hate being cranky, so I told the cna I need to take a nap while he's here. What a concept.

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

M1

GM, I know you may not want to consider it, but there are inpatient or residential Hospice options.  You need some hands-on help there, it sounds like.  Talk to your hospice contacts and see what they suggest.

Ed1937

I'm sorry you have to deal with that. I'll throw out another vote for checking on hospice possibilities.

GMGYPSY

The fact is we are in hospice care at home. The doctor who diagnosed him with Mantle Cell Lymphoma back in Oct.  gave him a 6 month timeline.  That would bring us up to March or April.  He is also late stage six Alz.  At this point he hasn't  eaten anything but ice cream  in 4 days. I can get him to drink a little.  He has not had a BM  since the 10th.Since I wrote this post he can no longer stand even with my help.  The hospice gave me a list of symptoms to expect when there is only weeks or days  left and he  pretty much checks off all of them. The lymphoma  by the way is at stage four. The hospice rn comes at least once per week , but has started to come mon. and fri.. the cna comes twenty plus hrs. per week .  

   We started the morphine about three weeks ago and the moaning and groning  and agitation has subsided so I feel that was the right call.  I started with a very low dose and not very often but have had to increase it a little.   Its the only comfort I can give him.When he can talk he says over and over Please, please let me go.  Everyday  my heart is breaking for him 

M1

Gm, my guess is he doesn't have much time left. I hope he's comfortable and know we are with you in spirit....

abc123

Hi GM, we are all thinking of you and Adam. This is an extremely hard time. You are surely a tough, strong lady. I can only imagine how exsausted you must be. Please keep us posted. You are all in my prayers.

Dreamer Lost

gm gypsie I am so sad to hear all of what you are going through with so little help.  I am glad you have hospice and a cna as much as you do.  I wonder if your Dh could tolerate something mild like melatonin or trazodone at night so that you might get a little sleep yourself.  I can relate to the peeing anytime, anywhere.  It is amazing how fast they can pee, generally in the middle of me changing his depends.  I can also relate to moving the bed towards your Dh and body slamming him into the bed as I have to do something like this to get my Dh into bed or into his recliner.  I know they are scared of falling and fight us pushing them backward but luckily it takes only a few seconds and then they are seated or reclining and forget all about it.  We do what we must.  As for not having a bm in 10 days, he may be constipated which is making him not want to eat.  You can try baby apple prune juice, or ask your physician or hospice if miralax or stool softener is needed to keep him comfortable. 

Please take care of yourself also.  Prayers of strength and comfort. 

JJAz

Talk with the doc about switching from Haldol to Seroquel.  Much less debilitating and frequently more beneficial for hallucinations.

Purchase 'anti-strip' clothing from Silvert's or Bucks online.  These jumpsuits zip up the back and patients cannot remove their underwear.

Have the doc check him for orthostatic hypotension if he is woozie when walking

Review the symptoms of Lewy Body Dementia as compared to Alzheimer's.  Your LO seems to have several of the symptoms.

Finally, consider hiring some help if you can.  Especially night time help so that you can get rest and avoid the crash and burn.

Keep up the good work