Let's talk day programs

JoseyWales

I'm putting together full-time care for DH when I return to work in August. Last year's plan was pieced together with lots of people, and DS was living home and helped. He'll be moving back to college in August. 

I've looked into the day programs around me, as suggested by many on this board. I live in a rural area, so there are limited programs. But they are all basically housed in nursing homes. The people there for the day just come and join into the day with the residents. Same activities. I've seen the schedules for activities. It's a lot of "chair exercise" and activities geared toward women (manicures). 

The cost is $15 an hour for most. No transportation (even if we lived nearby), so that's an extra time/expense and person to hire to manage getting him there in the morning.

What do day programs look like where you are, and are costs/activities similar to what I'm discovering?

LadyTexan

Greetings JoseyWales.

The day program that I am most familiar with in our community is held at the senior center. Here is the description from the club website:

TAKE FIVE CLUB DAY RESPITE

Our Take 5 Club is an onsite caregiver respite service for family members who are caring for an elderly loved one with dementia or other related health issues that makes if unsafe for them to be left alone.

Club sessions are 10:00 a.m. to 3:00 p.m., Mondays, Tuesdays and Thursdays, and consist of fun and stimulating activities, exercises, music, crafts and a nutritious hot lunch. While their loved ones are having fun at the Take 5 Club, caregivers enjoy a much-needed break.  The daily fee for club sessions is $35 per person. [Added by LT, that’s only $7 per hour]

TAKE FIVE CLUB ASSISTANCE FUND:  Some participants are on limited incomes and cannot afford regular attendance. An assistance fund was developed to help these families and their loved ones.  Your donations to this fund will give someone the benefits of attending and will allow their caregiver a needed respite.

CARE GIVER RESOURCE CENTER
We have an extensive lending library of books and pamphlets that are available at no charge for family caregivers! Materials can be checked-out during normal business hours.   

I am not sure if the club has started up again, post lock-down. 

My mom, who has MCI, has attended for several years. She is not a joiner and it is hard to get her enthusiastic about going. The club celebrates birthdays once per month, which is nice. The also have a jam band on Thursdays, which she enjoys. 

My DH has not attended because the program was closed when we moved to the area.

JoseyWales

LT - I wish there was something like that near me! That sounds affordable, and would have activities that I think DH would enjoy. Especially since he's only 57 and in pretty good physical shape.

I know the closest senior center has nothing like this, but I wonder about the ones in other close by towns. Thanks for a lead I hadn't thought of!

star26

In my area, one of the day programs available is somehow associated with the Office on Aging. They also run the caregiver support groups. It’s mostly for people with dementia but is open to others with caregiving needs. They have 3 locations based on the cognitive functioning of the participant - activities depend on the level. High to moderate level functioning PWD can join the intergenerational daycare program: They join with children’s daycare and act as pseudo grandparents. This seems to be as enjoyable for the men as it is for the women. When not doing this, many of the men are often playing cards. Other activities: Karaoke, other music/dancing, various crafts and games, exercise, and occasional visiting entertainers (typical nursing home stuff). The activities offered, the general feeling of energy in the place, and whether I found a particular location depressing did seem driven by the level of the participants. All include meals and snacks. $65-75/day, no hourly pricing. Showering is extra. I’m not in a big city and consider our resources to be pretty limited. I chose to drive 45 minutes to the higher functioning center as the others were just too depressing. 

French

My partner is the only eoad and his best friend at the daycare is Yvette who is 86 years old !

Certainly difficult to compare but it is from 10 am to 4:30 pm, the price is 36€ (43$) per day including meal and transportation. We live about 500 m from the daycare but I decided to take the transportation.

It is associated to a nursing home but in a separate building.

The day is 

- coffee, tea... at the arrival. 

- reading and commenting the newspaper together 

- sport on Tuesday, stimulation games the other days

- lunch

- respite

- activity that can be diy (cards, things to decorate...) or in the garden

- coffee, tea... before leaving.

Sometimes they go out for a walk, a picnic or a visit.

It isn’t very active but my partner doesn’t complain.

I tried having him going to table tennis organized by The association France Alzheimer but he prefer to go to the daycare. I think he feel secured there.

Daycare is more expensive than a caregiver at home because we don’t have subsidies but he prefers ne it is easier for me to organize. The main limit is that it begins at 10 am

JoseyWales

Star - thanks for your info. I can't seem to find anything similar to that here. My husband would actually love being with children. As he progresses he enjoys them more and more. 

French - I've "heard" you talk about your husband's day program before. It does sound like he really enjoys it. I could manage those hours if combined with some kind of in-home care. I'm going to need someone to drive him there, anyway. I'm honestly not too worried about age differences. Ironically, we used to do volunteer work in a nursing home, and DH really enjoyed being around people who were older than him. It will be much easier for me than most to play up these day care visits as volunteering. And I think he'll enjoy the socialization.

I'm still having trouble finding one around me, though. The one I mentioned before, and another similar program in a different direction. I can't get a couple of others to respond to me yet.

Ed1937

Hi Josey. I saw this thread before, but didn't really have anything to add. You mentioned before that you were close to an area where PACE is available. I was just wondering if it might be worth considering a nearby move for you? Of course I know this might not be something you would interested in. Just a thought. Hope you find something that works for you.

JoseyWales

Hi Ed - I've carefully considered moving, with pros and cons. But, my parents live only 1/2 mile away, and my work is only 4 miles away. As my parents age, I imagine I'll be helping them out more. I have the most wonderful neighbors who help me out whenever I need help. I've lived in this house for 24 years. I'm 53, and plan to be here a long time yet. 

And it's worth saying that I love where I live, except for the distance to support services (and  grocery stores. We are rural. ). I've managed to find people who can come to my house and be with DH most days, there's just 1 1/2 days a week without someone and I need back-up. And I think DH would enjoy being out.

6 years ago I was in a panic thinking about what I'd do when full-time care was necessary. I'm happy to say that while it's difficult, it's not been impossible. One step at a time!

aod326

Josey, even here in central NJ I was unable to find adult day care that fit with my working hours. I'm in the office a minimum of 8.30am - 6pm and even a couple of day centres that had pick-up and/or drop services, I wouldn't have been able to rely on DH to know what to do to get in the house, or leave the house. I'd seen suggested that I have an aide go with him to the day centre, but that would have meant paying all day for the aide + paying for the day centre! I had wanted a day centre for at least a couple of days a week because DH was super-social and I thought he'd benefit. (He was 59 and very physically active too.) Cost of day care centre in my area was around $120/day, including transportation. 

I'm afraid I don't have a solution, because we got lucky with COVID shutdown. My step-daughter who'd just graduated college was able to come 4 days a week to enable me to work uninterrupted. On Fridays, and then the rest of the time, once she'd started her own job, I just about managed, because of wfh. Then we had to place him in MC August.

Good luck.