Mom's Smoking

RobertGraves

HELP!

After a month of no smoking and feeling like we have passed the hard part, mom suddenly is asking for her smokes again.  She is becoming very angry at the issue.  She is on O2 and has end stage COPD.  On New Years day she was admitted to the hospital for severe pneumonia.  That night, as her heath care proxy, I was asked to sign her DNR. We thought we had lost her.  To our surprize she fought through it and came out of the hospital and rehab last week.  There was no mention of her smokes.  Then on Sunday night after dinner she asked for her smokes and demanded that her DH go to the store and buy her a pack.  It's been a battle for the last few days.  I see that sudden changes in mood need to be addressed by her Dr.,  the problem is her Dr. left the practice and as not been replaced to our knowledge.  What can we do in the meantime to correct this behavior.

Thanks

Robert

terei

IMO you will not be able to correct the behavior.   The way I would handle it is that I would just keep telling her ‘no, the doctor is in charge’ and try to get some nicotine patches that may help the cravings.   There are also oral drugs that will stem cravings but I do not know if they are recommended for the elderly.

I’m sure this is hard, but all you can do is refuse to engage about the subject

SusanB-dil

Hi Robert - welcome to 'here'...

agree with the suggestion of the nicotine patches.  or - maybe the nicotine lozenges, NOT at the same time as patches, but she may feel the need to maybe 'have something in her mouth'?  and someone in former doc's practice should have her records, I know you are looking to get another doc asap, but was that the only doc she had?  You lost her PrimCareDoc, but does she have a neurologist you could maybe check with?

mommyandme (m&m)

Maybe the nicotine patch and fake cigarettes that can meet the oral fixation?  

The dilemmas never sent end. So sorry!

sandwichone123

I think it's about what the goals are. I know if I had a terminal illness I would want my family to allow me the comforts I would enjoy. I realize with smoking there may also be immediate-term bad effects (like shortness of breath), but if my family member would get comfort from smoking I would let them.

Oxygen is an issue with smoking, but it doesn't become explosive, just makes things burn faster. I would provide an outdoor location with non-flammable furniture and supervision.

I know there are those who disagree and whose goals/values are to help their loved one's body last as long as possible. I respect that.

harshedbuzz

Dementia and fire are a no-go in my book. Sorry sandwichone. 

My late sister died from complications of AIDS in the mid 1990s; she had an unspecified form of dementia the last 6 months of her life (probably WKS) and was a smoker. Her ex had snuck her cigarettes while she was in the hospital treated for sepsis and she caught her bedding on fire. She's lucky she didn't injure herself and anyone else. 

Dad sort of time traveled with dementia and for a time in the earlish later stages went back mentally until when he was still a smoker. He'd quit decades ago, so we didn't need patches to replace nicotine, but we did find Wellbutrin seemed to quell the urge to smoke. Wellbutrin is marketed under Zyban for smoking cessation. It's available as a generic.

HB

May flowers

I quit smoking years ago by vaping. Satisfies both the nicotine craving and habit of puffing on something. My sister has COPD and vapes, and it has worked out ok for her.

I cut back on the nicotine over time, but depending on what stage your LO is with dementia, you wouldn’t necessarily have to.