Another insight to my wife's condition

Just Bill

I am both horrified and curious at the same time throughout this journey. Horrified for obvious reasons but curious to learn as much as I can about the disease and her experience with it so I can help us both navigate through it. Today as I was talking with my wife assessing her status a light went off in my head. Her primary symptoms are memory loss, cognitive impairment and hallucinations. She has one more symptom that explains a lot of her behavior and has given me new insight as another tool in my tool box. The new symptom is no awareness of time. Past or future. She is in the perpetual right now confused about what happened and whats going to happen at all times. That is why she is always busy and can't stand still. It is also why she is constantly asking what are we doing next or who is coming over. Her past is mostly dreams and confabulations. Our conversations have been simplified by reducing and eliminating timeline references. All references and conversation is related to the moment. The future is always bright and the past doesn't matter. I have completely let go of the anxiety her perpetual fidgeting was causing me. The house is safe  and if she is rattling around doing something she is filling in her right now so she isn't anxious about what happened or whats going happen. Imagining how that feels helps me gain more patience with her actions.

M1

My partner shares this too Bill.  No sense of time whatsoever.  Doesn't help to tell her I was there yesterday or will be there tomorrow, those concepts are completely gone.  All she knows when she sees me is that she wants to be with me constantly.  I am again thinking that it's better that I don't visit because my visits only seem to agitate her and bring no comfort.

Just Bill

I tell my my wife how lucky she is to be truly in the moment. People that seek enlightenment are travelling all kinds of paths to get to where she is. She is perpetually asking me questions pertaining to the future or the past and since my light went off  I answer her with what are you doing right now ? She seems to process that and is satisfied with the answer. Her memory loss and loss of timeline tracking keep her in the right now. If she gets upset for any reason 5 minutes later it's over. I can keep her happy in the moment by responding; Where do you want to go right now ? What do you want to do right now ? What are you thinking right now ? I live in the moment with her. There is no yesterday we did this or tomorrow we are going to do that. She can't remember those conversations or events anyway. All there is to her is right now.

Just Bill

M1, I don't know how the visit goes or your situation but focusing on the right now whenever she brings anything negative up from the past real or imagined. Or projects anything into the future real or imagined, just stay in the right now and just like her pretend you don't have an awareness of the past or future only what is happening right now. And to avoid a dramatic exit just disappear. One minute you are there the next poof you are gone.