My mask fail at Peggy's memory care

GothicGremlin

I'm kicking myself for this one...

I always wear a mask when I'm in memory care, for many reasons, and I try to keep them cheerful. Over the last year I've been wearing this mask: Candide. When my s.o. reordered, he accidentally got me one that looks like this: Chakra. It's a blue pattern and I didn't think anything of it. I wore it last Thursday, and Peggy hated it. She kept pointing at it and asking "is this you? is this you?" She was mightily distressed.

Friday I wore a plain white N95 and it went over much better, although she did comment on it. I think the two masks were unexpected and made my face look just different enough that it was jarring for her. I have a new Candide on rush order. SMH

Peggy's friend M always wears the same outfit when he visits her and the same mask. It's almost his uniform at this point. I rotate about three different outfits, but I always try for style continuity, and I never wear black, which is what I normally wear outside of memory care. I just didn't think about the masks....

Living and learning ....

harshedbuzz

That's interesting that your Candide has become part of who you are to Peggy.

forbarbara

Kicking yourself?? You are waaaaay more sensitive than most of the people I see at MC - including myself. There may not be a lot of blessings in Peggy’s world these days but you are definitely one of them.

GothicGremlin

Yeah, the whole mask incident threw me. It never even crossed my mind that it could be an issue. After all, it's only been the last three years that anyone wears masks with any regularity, while, in our case, we have 60+ mask-free years under our belts. But maybe it's like what @harshedbuzz says, that particular mask has become part of who I am to Peggy. Maybe it had to do with the particular stage she was in when we first started wearing masks. Or maybe mask-wearing is just so much the norm now, that it's pattern or routine that Peggy expects. I don't really know. What I do know though is - Candide masks for ever! 😄

@forbarbara thank you, you're very kind. But really, it's that I see Peggy struggle, and if she's struggling, so are other residents. I just don't want to make matters worse for anyone, especially Peggy.

eaglemom

That is fascinating, in a sad way. Never would I ever have given a second thought to a mask - I have learned something very important here. Thank you for sharing.

None of us wants to cause anyone to struggle, much less our LO's.

eagle

ImMaggieMae

What a beautiful mask! I can see why she might be partial to it. Such lovely colors.