DW just diagnosed with Early onset Alzheimer's

Kcr77056

My DW (63) has recently been diagnosed with early onset Alzheimer's so we are in the beginning stages of dealing with it. We've been through 5 months of testing. Her mother is in assisted living and soon to be in memory care for alzheimers so she sees and knows the likely progression. We have 3 grandbabies and more on the way and the thought of the disease resulting in less time with them or maybe their parents keeping them away from her is currently a source of great grief. That image is all she can focus on at this point rather than the years we will have between then and now. I am looking for advice on navigating these stages of grief and wondering how I can help her the most to move through this. The fact is the fact and we are living with it now…..but how can we move through the stages of grief and maximize these years?

Thank you

Lgb35

I don’t know how old your grand babies are but we are in a similar situation. DH will be 62 this summer. We have 4 grandkids. The two oldest are 8 and the baby is 15 months. There are some great books about memory balloons to explain what is happening for little ones.

Since she has a fear the parents will withhold the grandkids you should have a conversation with them. Let them know what is happening and the fears going forward.

I can tell you my experience with my grandfather with dementia. He did not know my name or that I was a grandchild but he did know I was someone important to him. We had some great conversations during that time. He seemed the happiest I have seen in my entire life. I guess my message here is. While my grandfather didn’t know who I was or remembered the talks, I have those moments to remember. And you don’t know how long you have. We are in year 6 in this journey and haven’t gotten to that point yet and we don’t know how long we will have to build those memories. Maybe not for him but for the grandkids.

SDianeL

So sorry about your DWs diagnosis. This forum is the place for info and support. this may help: https://www.alz.org/help-support/i-have-alz/know-what-to-expect/just-diagnosed

Russinator

I really liked what Lgb35 wrote.

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We found out 3.5 years ago my wife has ALZ. We do not have Grandchildren and will not have any. I wanted to let you know, that the grieving never stops. As my wife declines, both of us grieve. Make the best of the time you have, and don't look back. Good luck

Kcr77056

So appreciative of the insight from each of you!