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tfnots
tfnots Member Posts: 19
10 Comments First Anniversary 5 Care Reactions
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in Caring For a Spouse or Partner
I'm new to this forum New to the world of caring for a spouse with Dementia. We are just beginning our journey. Is there someone who is also just beginning? My spouse still does all his own ADLs. His deficit is remembering and language. He is aware his memory is fading and it frustrates him. He can no longer carry on a meaningful conversation. This is a scary place to be. I'm realistic in that I know I have a long ways to go....

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  • charley0419
    charley0419 Member Posts: 474
    100 Likes 100 Care Reactions 100 Comments Second Anniversary
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    Welcome. This is great place for help. My wife diagnosed 15 months ago moderate early dementia, she’s 77. She has short term memory loss no drive gets confused in denial really anosognosia.

  • wevrldy1
    wevrldy1 Member Posts: 2
    First Comment
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    I’m also new here. My husband has been diagnosed as early and his symptoms are his memory mostly but also some paranoia and difficulty comprehending new tasks if they’re complicated. His frustration outbursts are the most difficult to deal with though. Like you I’m hoping for a place for support.
  • M1
    M1 Member Posts: 6,788
    1,500 Care Reactions 1,500 Likes 5000 Comments 1,000 Insightfuls Reactions
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    Welcome to you both, you have come to the right place though we are all sorry you need to join us. If you look to the right under Groups, there is one for new members that collects a lot of good information and handouts in one place. Early advice always includes getting your legal affairs in order, accomplishing as much of your bucket list as you can, and planning ahead for future care needs including possible memory care or nursing home care. Unless you can afford private pay or have long-term care insurance, many need to handle their assets correctly so that you can eventually qualify your spouse for Medicaid.

    If you read a lot of threads you will learn many things. I hope it helps you as much as it has helped me. There are people at every stage of the journey here, and we all try to help each other.

  • Ed1937
    Ed1937 Member Posts: 5,099
    Seventh Anniversary 2500 Comments 500 Likes 250 Care Reactions
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    Newcomers, welcome. You found a great place to get understanding and support. People here have a lot of knowledge, and they are willing to share. Some say that the early stages are the hardest because it seems you are always going to doctors, and hopefully to see a CELA (certified elder law attorney), as well as everything else that needs attention.

    Here is a link that most people find very helpful, especially when they are somewhat new to this disease. https://www.smashwords.com/extreader/read/210580/1/understanding-the-dementia-experience#hlangandcommun  

  • blacksparky
    blacksparky Member Posts: 103
    100 Care Reactions 25 Insightfuls Reactions 25 Likes 10 Comments
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/68343/new-to-this

    I’m new here also. Oct 23 de was diagnosed with road. She’s 54. Dr at Mayo Clinic told us the disease probably started 5-7 years ago. Looking back, I now see that there were signs then but we never had a clue that it might be Alzheimer’s. Seems like each day we experience different progression of this disease. I’m glad to have found out about this sight as I will probably use it a lot.

  • Katielu
    Katielu Member Posts: 87
    Second Anniversary 25 Likes 25 Care Reactions 10 Comments
    Member

    Hello, my husband was diagnosed just over a year ago, rapidly declining, does his own ADL’s when reminded. He no longer sets up his own meds, no longer handles the finances. He can’t learn new things and can’t follow more than one instruction at a time, yet in his mind, he just has “ normal aging” even after being told he has dementia and this will get worse not better.

    I still work outside our home one day a week, and have cut my work hours in half ( I am 60, he is 73)

    it is scary and hard to face. I have found this to be a safe place, full of answers and good advice, no judgment here.

  • tfnots
    tfnots Member Posts: 19
    10 Comments First Anniversary 5 Care Reactions
    Member

    Thank-you for your responses. While it's reassuring to know you folks are going through this, too...it's disheartening to face the reality that growing older has these challenges. Guess it's where I am now and one day at a time, for sure. With some planning for down the road. Thank-you for some suggestions on where to begin with preparations for the long haul.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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