Driving
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Comments
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There are a lot of answers you can find about the views of many on here about driving and the risks involved for a compromised person. We all (including me) tend to think about the person getting lost and that’s it. There is so much more to it. My DH can function ok. Still gets dressed fine and can carry on a conversation. His short term memory is getting worse and his comprehension skills are impacted. He doesn’t drive any more. He got in his truck one day and couldn’t figure out how to roll the window down. He’s had this truck for 30 years. We were driving to town in our other 10 year old car and he asked me how to turn the windshield wipers on. It’s not just about getting lost. It’s about their reaction time, what they notice and what they miss. It becomes a safety issue for pedestrians and others on the road. If there is any record anywhere of cognitive decline and your OH is involved in an accident, there could be a lawsuit. Food for thought. It’s a very very difficult thing for anyone to give up driving.
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My DH stopped driving about 5 years ago, which is 5 years before he was diagnosed with ALZ. He just wasn't paying attention to what was going on around him. Once the kids began telling him that he wasn't safe, he did not put up a fuss. But, really, he shouldn't have been driving even that long. He nearly got us killed twice. It isn't just his safety. For us, if we had been hit, the other driver might have been killed as well.
As long as a person has a dirver's license, you have to have insurance. DH now has an ID issued by the DMV.
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My wife stopped driving when she was diagnosed because her experience in the insurance industry told her she would be found at fault for anything that happened regardless of the circumstances. Driving with dementia is like driving drunk, without the jail time. Even if the other party created the problem, the argument is that an unimpaired driver would have prevented the injuries.
Driving is the most complicated thing most people do. An impaired person should not drive, whether the impairment is due to dementia, prescription pain killers after surgery, or whatever.
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As someone who has witnessed a 4-year-old killed in a parking lot by a driver who suddenly forgot what pedal was the brake and what was the gas on a sunny summer day, I feel driving needs to stop ASAP. Others have already mentioned that you cannot predict when a person with dementia suddenly has a decline in their cognitive abilities and it can be so much more than forgetting where to go.
Perhaps it is easiest to ask yourself if you would let them get behind the wheel if they were drunk, because they are impaired now, whether it is very obvious or not. It’s not easy and it is a loss, sadly one of the many this disease inflicts on those that suffer from it.
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after my DH was tested the Neuropsychologist said he should no longer drive. She said he had visuospatial difficulties that could cause an accident. She said once any doctor noted his file about his cognitive issues if he were in an accident even if it wasn’t his fault that we could be sued and lose everything. I sat him down and explained what the doctor said about visuospatial difficulties and that he could run into another car or somebody walking and we could be sued and lose everything. The next day he brought me his keys and never drove again. This disease can progress rapidly so best to be safe. I didn’t talk to my DH about Dementia or Alzheimer’s. I just said he was having the visuospatial difficulties. I called his doctors brain doctors. That worked for him.
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My DH stopped driving voluntarily as soon as it was documented in his medical records he was seeking a diagnosis related to memory concerns. He is a smart man and retired attorney. He knew that once that was part of his medical record, we could lose everything we have built even if an accident was not his fault. It wasn’t fair because at the time the mild memory loss was not affecting his driving. But WHAT IS FAIR ABOUT ALZHEIMERS??
I am grateful my DH made a wise choice to protect everyone’s safety and our assets, as well as no struggle occurred to take the keys from him.
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Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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