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Ouch

CindyBum
CindyBum Member Posts: 307
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in Caring For a Spouse or Partner

The holidays sure have a way. I know I’m lucky to still have my DW, but …

She asked me to take her to go Christmas shopping the last month, so I did. She got presents for everyone in her family…except for me.

Put that there in the things that hurt category.

Comments

  • Bailey's Mom
    Bailey's Mom Member Posts: 105
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    At least she remembered that it's christmas! DH asks me several times a day what holiday is coming up. He would never think of buying gifts, but that's ok…I sure don't need anything. We are just not celebrating…haven't put up even one xmas decoration…what's the point?

  • White Crane
    White Crane Member Posts: 925
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    I’m so sorry, Cindy. Wish I could give you a big hug.

    Brenda

  • Karen711
    Karen711 Member Posts: 99
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    edited December 2024

    Ugh and ouch!!! Not surprising but that doesn’t take the sting out of it. My DW will pull one of the two pieces of bread I put in the toaster that I put in for both of us. She’ll butter hers and walk off ignoring mine. A minor example of everyday occurrences. At least she can still butter toast. Still hurts though. Sending you a hug!!

    Karen

  • Carl46
    Carl46 Member Posts: 335
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    Sorry, Cindy. I know how you feel.

  • ronda b
    ronda b Member Posts: 121
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/231865#Comment_231865

    The same here

  • Kat63
    Kat63 Member Posts: 88
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    As others have said, ouch. I know that hurts. Last year my DH wanted to get a gift (I thought for me). My daughter took him and got me a gift. But my DH would point to the gift and say that’s for my mom. This year there is no real recognition of Christmas at all. He doesn’t like the presents under the tree, as they are just things out of place to him.

  • SPin-need
    SPin-need Member Posts: 15
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/231865#Comment_231865

    The point is only if it will bring you joy.

  • Bailey's Mom
    Bailey's Mom Member Posts: 105
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/231930#Comment_231930

    That's true SPin-need…not the case here at the moment. Maybe someday.

  • SPin-need
    SPin-need Member Posts: 15
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/231964#Comment_231964

    I hope I will find joy again someday and I have that wish for you as well.

  • KathyBol
    KathyBol Member Posts: 24
    10 Comments 5 Care Reactions
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    We did have a nice Christmas Eve and Christmas Day, DH even bought a lovely gift for me. While we were taking the tree down on New Years Day, he started talking about going home. It has been a week now, his personality comes and goes. Just this morning, he asked for the car keys again. He lost the set with the dead battery, so, I told him I would take him wherever he wanted to go. He swore at me and said to get out of his life. I feel like I’m living with JJekyl and Hyde!

  • Bailey's Mom
    Bailey's Mom Member Posts: 105
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/233364#Comment_233364

    I am so sorry and can totally relate. I think one of the hardest thing to deal with is the wild mood swings…just when you get your hopes up and relax a little bit the hammer comes down! I have lowered my expectations down to practically zero, but it still hurts when it comes out of nowhere. Hugs ❤️…

  • KathyBol
    KathyBol Member Posts: 24
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    Thank you, it is terrible. The worst is that he seems to be able to control himself for other people. Have you experienced that?

  • Bailey's Mom
    Bailey's Mom Member Posts: 105
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    https://alzconnected.org/discussion/comment/233380#Comment_233380

    Yes…he can control himself pretty well around other people, although he talks (preaches) excessively without ever thinking that the person he is talking to may have no interest in what he is talking about…like political subjects and conspiracy theories. He has done this for years though…people have actually asked me if he has an 'off button'! I don't expect that he will be able to continue this for long however.

  • Russinator
    Russinator Member Posts: 61
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    Member

    ((HUGS))

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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