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DH home from respite care

marier
marier Member Posts: 98
Sixth Anniversary 25 Likes 25 Care Reactions 10 Comments
Member

Dh is to return home today from a 10 day respite stay at a great place . I am having conflicting feelings and thoughts. I am at some level looking forward to having him at home again and then I wish he could just stay at this memory care place. It is a great place. He participating in all the activities they have and seems to be really enjoying himself vs coming home and having limited things to do. I also have really enjoyed his time away and I am not anxious to get back to the routine of a caregiver. I will stay calm and carry on until the next respite visit time. I just needed to vent about the conflicting feelings.

Comments

  • JDancer
    JDancer Member Posts: 501
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Care Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments
    Member

    My spouse recently spent 5 days in respite care, before being discharged from hospice for being "too good." It was my first break in 5 years and it was heavenly. He did have a period of adjustment afterwards. More frequent bowel/bladder accidents as he got back into our home routine.

  • ladyzetta
    ladyzetta Member Posts: 1,199
    Eighth Anniversary 1000 Comments 100 Likes 25 Care Reactions
    Member

    It was nice you had some time to yourself, caregivers really need and deserve any time they can fine. Just think how well he adjusted to the facility. Now when you need time for yourself you will be able to get some. Also when and if the time comes to place him, it will be easier. Take care of yourself. Hugs Zetta

  • Jgirl57
    Jgirl57 Member Posts: 646
    Fifth Anniversary 250 Likes 500 Comments 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    Thanks for sharing your vent . Let us know how the adjustment back to home goes for both of you. I recently put a deposit down for a 2 week respite in September.

  • Dio
    Dio Member Posts: 814
    250 Likes 250 Care Reactions 500 Comments Third Anniversary
    Member

    Placement was my salvation! I had to deal with a lot of guilt, but it's nothing compared to wishing God would take one of us. You'll know when it's time for placement.

  • tonyac2
    tonyac2 Member Posts: 27
    25 Likes 25 Care Reactions 10 Comments 5 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member
    edited June 15

    I wish I could find a place that would care for my DH for one week. All of them want at least two weeks to a month. It’s not like I have the cash for one week, let alone one month. I desperately need a break from him. In the mean time this disease is eating up every last cent we have. Totally feel trapped at times, it’s awful.

  • jehjeh
    jehjeh Member Posts: 125
    100 Comments 100 Care Reactions 25 Insightfuls Reactions 25 Likes
    Member

    I, too, would love to get away but i also have to watch the finances. Caregiver comes two afternoons a week but I still can't get far from home. DH thinks Medicare is covering this care but, in reality, I'm paying out of pocket. Since we can't know how long this will go on, and I will eventually have to add more care, possibly even a move to MC one day, spending money now is terrifying. I need to make sure there's enough for the long haul, plus enough to support me. (I'm younger than DH and need to plan for many years ahead of me) I try not to worry about things I have no control over but I really wish there were more options available for caregivers.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more