Anosognosia, alcohol and dementia

Maru · August 17

DH has AL and small vessel disease. I was thinking that he was living in denial but I'm pretty sure that is is anosognosia. Having said that and my pointing out to him that alcohol will destroy more brain cells, he still has a glass of wine every night, sometimes two and a margarita if we go out. He is borderline dementia. I keep the wine in the house for our son's weekly visit.

I could have a talk with our son about not drinking when he comes over…one possible solution to part of the problem.

My real question is what is the point of stopping him from drinking? He is 90 years old, couldn't tolerate any of the regular AL meds and we opted not to do the Lequembi infusions, so there is only a downward track at this point. How much faster will that be with the alcohol? Drinking too much is not a problem. Am I making a mountain out of mole hill or overthinking this?

ronda b · August 17

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/73807/anosognosia-alcohol-and-dementia

Yes

H1235 · August 17

My mom has diabetes and is 80. She eats any sweets she can get her hands on. My first thoughts when she was diagnosed was to get her on a proper diet. It didn’t take longs for me to realize that was just not owing to work. I wanted to do whatever is reasonable to keep her healthy. I now realize/accept that that a restrictive diet is not reasonable. As you have said this is terminal. There is so much that has been taken away from her, if a cookie makes her happy, she should have a cookie. So with all that in mind and given he is 90, in my humble opinion, just let him have the wine. Unless it becomes excessive or there are behavior problems that go with it.

harshedbuzz · August 17

He's terminally ill. Assuming he doesn't have an alcohol-related dementia like WKS, moderate drinking in this instance is unlikely to change anything.

Why take this pleasure from him?

cdgbdr · August 17

I agree with the others. Unless it has a negative effect on his bahavior, let him continue what he enjoys.

murpc76 · August 17

My husband and I have always enjoyed a good IPA beer. As we began the journey of AL, we did about a month of clean eating and no alcohol. He had just started donepezil. There was a marked improvement but it was short lived. That was Dec. 2022. Most of our friendships over the years flourished from outings at breweries and the local watering holes in our small town. As things progressed, I gradually had to become the “bad guy” and set a limit on how much my husband could drink when we were out with friends. I hate it. He is a fast drinker and IPAs are high in alcohol compared to a coors light or similar (which he hates). I thought allowing him just two beers once or twice a week in social settings was enough. I thought this would slow things down. Today, I dumped all beer cans and bottles that had been in the fridge for months (some years). I didn’t feel bad over this at all and felt great having more space in the fridge. I would love for him to not drink at all, but then realized I wanted this more for me than for him. I thought we would be able to continue coasting and I would have him longer.

He is stage 5 to 6 and I am discarding the idea that he shouldn’t drink, within reason of course. Now that we have a clean slate in the fridge, I will probably be getting a four pack of good IPAs that he’ll enjoy. The disease is gonna do what it’s gonna do. I’ve had to take away the driving. The least I can do is let him have this until…

At 90, I say, Cheers! And especially if when he has the wine is while spending time with your son 💜

trottingalong · August 17

Let him have his glass of wine and margarita. My husband has never been a big drinker, but we do enjoy having a glass of wine together some evenings. Maybe he will have two. I don’t care.

BPS · August 17

My dad had cancer an was an alcoholic. He was released from the hospital to a SNF for a while before we got him home on hospice, but while he was at the SNF I would take him a small bottle of whisky for him to have a drink. He was dyeing so I wanted him to have what he wanted. He didn't want just a drink he wanted to keep the bottle, so I let him, the care takers there took it from him and told me he couldn't have that there. I told them that I would keep bring it and they told me that they would keep taking it away. I told them I understood and they didn't say anything to me again about it.. He was only there for about a week before we got him home to die, but my thought was why not let him have whatever he wanted as long as it didn't cause a problem for others. Yes it was bad for his health but he was dyeing anyway. His wife later told me she wished she had not spent so much time nagging him about his drinking after his diagnoses and spent more time enjoying what time they had together. The fight is not worth the missed memories. Enjoy what you can for as long as you can. This is a long journey but each day we lose chances at good memories.

rplourde50 · August 18

We are in the same boat. My DW drinks about a 6-pack a day. This is how she wants to live her remaining years, she has said. I just keep an eye on her and guide her to bed if she becomes "tipsy" (that is unstable on her feet). There is a book called "Being Mortal…" by Atul Gawande, a geriatric physician who talks about the quality, not quantity of end-of-life. There is a line in there from some man who said (I paraphrase), "as long as I can eat ice cream and watch baseball I want to continue. When I can't do that it's my time to go". Similar for my DW. As long as she can sit on the patio and drink beer she's good with it.

Timmyd · August 18

DW was a life long moderate (responsible) drinker her who adult life. Starting late stage 5 she lost her taste for alcohol and stopped drinking completely. The same with coffee. She now has no interest in either. However, in its place, she has developed a relentless appetite for sweets (cookie, ice cream, cake etc). She would eat it for every meal if I let her.

Anosognosia, alcohol and dementia

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