Have any questions about how to use the community? Check out the Help Discussion.

Navigating Senior Care/Nursing home/Memory Care

Hey again!

I am overwhelmed with all the the things involving how to pay for my moms care when she will need a nursing home or assisted living or memory care. I am trying to find all the differences and which one fits her needs. But not now. She is ok for now. I just know I need to make a plan before she needs it. We have some savings for her and I know that we will have to use all of that before she can apply for Medicaid. I think my plan is to move her to a home where they accept Medicaid, but I will self pay for a few months first. I saw that on a video about senior care prepping. But I just don't know all the ins and outs of it! How do I know they wont abuse her? I hate that idea so much! If you have any advice or guidance I would much appreciate it!

Comments

  • SusanB-dil
    SusanB-dil Member Posts: 1,474
    1000 Comments 250 Likes 100 Care Reactions Third Anniversary
    Member

    Assisted living is for those who can still manage to do quite a bit on their own. Often, by the time you think this may be needed, it is past this stage.

    Nursing home/memory care I would recommend you check their ratings as well as go visit. We are going by word-of-mouth for when it comes time. Lots of advice and tips are on various threads here, just key it into the search.

  • H1235
    H1235 Member Posts: 1,135
    1000 Comments 250 Insightfuls Reactions 250 Likes 100 Care Reactions
    Member

    I have attached a website that has information on Medicaid for each state. The qualifications are different as well as what they will pay for depending on your state. Have you seen a lawyer yet. That would probably be a good idea. They may also help with some suggestions regarding preparing for Medicaid. We were devised to do a prepaid funeral among other things. There are also important rules to follow to avoid problems. The biggest one is no gifting of any kind. Again a lawyer could help with details. In my state they can look back 5 years for red flags. As far as the difference in facilities, Al usually provides laundry services, help with medication, activities and meals. Resident are free to come and go. Residents at mom’s facility often walked on a nice path around the building for exercise. Some may provide more care. MC is a locked facility. Residents cannot leave on their own. They also provide more help with dressing, showering, and toileting. Obviously this is more expensive. A snf probably offers services very similar to mc, but they are not nearly as nice. In my state a snf is really the only thing covered by Medicaid. There is a Medicaid waiver program that will cover some Al, but the only Al facilities covered 100% were absolute dumps. For a nice basic al family is expected to contribute anything Medicaid doesn’t cover. We opted for a nice snf. It is very difficult to figure out, so it’s good you are getting started early.

    https://www.medicaid.gov/state-overviews

  • Ronk246
    Ronk246 Member Posts: 30
    25 Care Reactions Second Anniversary 10 Comments 5 Likes
    Member

    After spending a lot of time inspecting MC facilities, it is apparent the ones that are the nicest are never those that accept Medicare. I determined if my wife outlives me, or we both need to go into memory care at the same time, I have given instructions to our friends we should go to the nicest one available of the three best I found. Hopefully, by the time our money runs out, we won't be bothered much by the conditions of the Medicare units we are sent to then.

  • Michele P
    Michele P Member Posts: 15
    10 Comments 5 Care Reactions
    Member

    We are working with a company called Oasis. They are located in multiple states and offer free assistance with placement in assisted living and long term memory care facilities. The person who works with you will set up a time to tour the facilities they recommend based on your criteria and needs. They highly suggest that you go on a waitlist once you find a facility that meets your needs- even if it is early stage- so that you have an option for placement when needed. They will call when space is available and keep you on the list indefinitely. They also recommend in home care agencies as well as therapist.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more