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Another hit to my heart

I posted a couple of months ago regarding my DW not remembering our anniversary and how it really hurt me. Well guess what, today is her birthday and she had no idea that she had a birthday. I should be used to this but it still hurts. That’s all

Comments

  • Metta
    Metta Member Posts: 34
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    Member

    Feeling the hurt right here with you. We went out to lunch for DH’s birthday and Father’s Day in June. Those were our last celebrations out together because we are housebound now. The lost celebrations hurt.

    Hugs to you…

  • Chris20cm
    Chris20cm Member Posts: 88
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    Member

    Yes, that is painful but I try not to take it personally. Easier said than done, but there's a part of my wife's brain that's not functioning and she doesn't remember when or where we were married 60 years ago, when birthdays are, and she asks me 50 times a day "what month are we in?"

  • CindyBum
    CindyBum Member Posts: 498
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    Member

    Ouchie. Hugs

  • Chance Rider
    Chance Rider Member Posts: 55
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    Member

    I’m so sorry your DW no longer recognizes the special milestone dates. It’s like a gut punch every time. Our 26th anniversary was 8/22… this is the 2nd anniversary he couldn’t remember. I know it’s the disease but it still hurts.

    Hugs,

    Eve

  • annie51
    annie51 Member Posts: 360
    250 Care Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments Second Anniversary
    Member

    It is heartbreaking. I do my best to just think of those days as regular days. If it’s my birthday I treat myself to my favorite cake or some extra wine. It’s harder for the big holidays…coming up soon. 😞

    Hugs to you.

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 2,079
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    💜

  • BPS
    BPS Member Posts: 336
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    Member

    My wife was in MC for 49th anniversary. I went and pick her up and brought her home for most of the day. I tried to make it special. I even had hope that if I did or said the right thing it might be a good day. It wasn't and I was disappointed. We just had our 50th a week ago and she has declined so It is almost impossible to take her out. I went to visit her and I mentioned it once and she said "it is" and that was our whole celebration. Just a normal day. It was about the same for her birthday in July.

  • charley0419
    charley0419 Member Posts: 494
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    Member

    married 56 yrs wife doesn’t remember date also code for many everday things has no idea. That should be the worse thing she forgets as time goes by. Illness sucks!!!

  • White Crane
    White Crane Member Posts: 1,058
    Eighth Anniversary 500 Care Reactions 250 Likes 500 Comments
    Member

    I know it hurts. My DH hasn't remembered our anniversary or his or my birthday in a long time. He's in MC now and when I visit him on those special days, I have no expectation that he will remember. What I do is try to make it special for him by bringing him a treat and a card and just spending time with him. I'm the memory keeper now but I do miss being able to share them with him.

  • JulietteBee
    JulietteBee Member Posts: 219
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    Member

    My DM forgot my birthday this year for the first time in my life. It felt as if someone ripped my heart right out of my chest. It hurts, and hurts badly.😭

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more