Hi! I'm new here... I'm a granddaughter taking care of a grandfather with suspected dementia

Welcome. Many people with dementia have anosognosia. This is the inability to recognize their symptoms or limitations. It is very difficult. Trying to reason with him or convince him will not work and usually leads to an argument. Here are a few things that might help. If it’s not a big deal just let it go. If he thinks the grass is purple, that’s ok. Another option is to change the subject, distract. Bring him a cookie or turn on a favorite tv show. It might also be helpful at times to tell a fib or two. Tell him the doctor said you shouldn’t… Maybe tell him the help around the house is for you. It’s a whole different way of thinking that doesn’t come naturally, because most have been taught to tell the truth. In my opinion if it saves your loved one from getting upset, it worth it. The doctor may prescribe medication to help. Do you or another family member have a durable power of attorney? This is very important! If you don’t have it yet you should see a lawyer soon. Don’t wait, he has to be able to understand what he is signing ( in my experience the bar is set pretty low, but I wouldn’t put it off). As far as the nursing home goes, no one wants to go to a nursing home, especially someone who thinks there is nothing wrong with them (anosognosia). The caregiver tends to have a lot of the anger, blame and resentment directed towards them. It’s so hard, since you are the one working so hard to care for him and keep him safe. Some people with dementia take direction and help from a family member with even more scorn and anger than they do from aids. He will eventually require 24/7 care if he doesn’t already. I assume you are young. In my opinion you need to live your life. You should at least consider a nursing home, look at options for him. There can sometimes be a waiting list to get in, you don’t want to wait too long. You can still be a kind, caring, loving granddaughter without caring for him 24/7. A DPOA is a lot of work, he would need someone to advocate for him and communicate with doctors and nurses, he would need visits, snacks and someone to manage finances. A nursing home generally means Medicaid. A lawyer can also help with this. I have attached several resources for you. Information and knowledge can help things go more smoothly.

https://www.agingcare.com/topics/295/anosognosia

https://www.alzinfo.org/understand-alzheimers/clinical-stages-of-alzheimers/

https://www.medicaidplanningassistance.org/medicaid-eligibility-income-chart/