Dogs and Alzheimer’s

Early in my DW’s journey, about the time she was first diagnosed we got a puppy (see my avatar). My DW had taken a strong interest in my daughter’s dog, a cockapoo, so we got one too. My DW certainly enjoyed the dog, but had no instinct to actually take care of him. At that time I also retired as my DW started needing 24/7 care, which meant I would be home to properly look after the pup. 

So if you get a dog, even if you think your DH is in the early stages, you will probably need to be the primary doggie caregiver sooner than later. Puppies need to be housebroken by taking them outside at regular intervals, something a PWD may have trouble keeping track of. One former member of this site had quite a problem with her LO constantly over feeding their animals. 

In our case we ended not neutering the dog because I tested the dog with the necessary “cone of shame” and my DW did not like it and it seemed like she was going to try to liberate the puppy from the cone at any opportunity. I suspected this would happen and that’s why I tested it before actually having the operation done.

But as I said she enjoyed the dog until she had to be placed in a MCF.  Now the dog is my constant companion and certainly eases the loneliness that resulted.

So similar for us with one exception, we got our puppy mainly for me. Our daughter found us an 8 week old Schnoodle fully house trained thankfully but we still had to go through the puppy stage of very sharp teeth, chewing everything and needing to be taken out during the night. We had many exhausting nights of all of us getting up to go at the same time then difficulty settling down again. We are both retired DH has aphasia and dementia I needed something extra to hold and love and I will be ever thankful for this. Milo is wonderful with my DH he has a “where’s Gary” command and he’s off like a jack rabbit to find my DH, brilliant. He’s also a registered Care Dog so we can take him anywhere, shops, doctors etc.

As Vitruvius says be prepared for all the caring feeding and exercising to fall on your shoulders, plus a puppy has an extraordinary requirement for exercise and this is a harder task than I thought.

Perhaps there might be a mature dog that requires a new home that way you can match personality with personality and do a home trial. They are so nonjudgmental you can talk to them, pet them, pour out your heart to them and cry and they are so loyal and understanding. Good luck.

Wow, a great question because many see a pet as a good action to help and for some it is, I am sure. In our case we had always had dogs and had one when my dear wife's process began to become more pronounced. She loved that dog so much but it quickly became clear that she was unable to care for it reliably. It sometimes would cause agitation for her if it begged for attention. As others have said, I became the primary caregiver for the dog as well as my dear wife. In short order I had to adopt out the dog and found that she had little memory of it and never felt the loss. Each case is truly different but just be prepared for unfortunate and sudden changes which can impact the pressures for you with a pet added to your responsibility.

Dogs are wonderful! But they need and deserve attentive care. A dog for you might be great, but a dog for your DH? If you get a dog, you will want to think of it right away as your dog. That’s only fair to the dog.

My DW is now in stage 5 of EOAD. We’ve had our lab since before her diagnoses. I now have to keep an eye on her around the dog. She will feed the dog whatever she is eating that are possibly dangerous for the dog like chocolate, grapes etc. if we did not have a dog at the time okie dokie diagnoses 3 years ago, I personally would not get one. Everyone had to decide if it is a good idea or not.

Hello gorgeous Schnoodle so nice to see and yes wonderful company only if it works.

My Mom (stage 6c) and Sandy the Golden Retriever are best buddies. The dog is good for her mentally as she deteriorates. Sandy has sometimes knocked over Mom showing too much love. Mom tries to scold the dog as if she were reverting to raising us kids again.

Pets are a huge YES, as long as you understand that you will be the caretaker for the puppy. Our cat looks after my wife as much as I do (LOL), and she will meow loudly if I my wife needs my attention.

I am a huge advocate for music and pets. I even have an aquarium filled with decorative tetras (small fresh water tropical fish). My dear wife loves the aquarium, and I even enjoy cleaning it (therapeutic). Pets are wonderful for you as a caregiver, and they can keep your loved one company while you putter around the house and get things done.

My question would be why a puppy? We have an 11 year old shepherd that has always been more my husbands. We love her dearly, but he’s become clueless about caring for her. Last January a friend who had just been diagnosed with dementia asked if I would take her two year old shepherd. I knew I could not handle a puppy, so had been looking for an older companion dog. Well, I couldn’t say no and I just absolutely love her. She’s my companion and like Biggles, something to cuddle with. My husband enjoys her as well, and has always been an animal lover. Now he’s getting more and more detached and cannot comprehend my attachment. So please think hard about getting a puppy. They take a lot of work and it wouldn’t be fair to the dog if it doesn’t get proper care and exercise.

It's impossible to predict how the dementia will progress. We have two large 8 year old golden doodles that we got as puppies. DH was probably in early stage dementia when we got them, but it looked like depression and anxiety at that point. For the past five years, he has not been able to take care of the dogs. He can't walk them, even if I take one and go along. He's not able to remember how to feed them or change their water, and I have to watch to make sure he doesn't give them anything that will make them sick. I have to be present even for them to go out in the yard. Of course, at this point, DH is can't be be home on his own at all.

On the positive side, he loves the dogs very much and interacting with them is less stressful than trying to have conversations with people, even me. Even though it's more work for me to take care of them, I love them too and their presence is very comforting.

In your situation, a somewhat older dog who's already house trained might be a good choice, especially since you're still working. House training, dealing with puppy chewing and nipping, and basic obedience training would be challenging for someone with dementia. There could be a nice, affectionate, and already trained dog out there who needs a home.

Several years ago before my dh was diagnosed with EOAD, we rescued a 2 year old Maltese mix. My dh is crazy about her. He doesn’t do any of the direct care, but he’s always looking after her and being a dog dad. One thing I’ve noticed is he’ll project his feelings onto her, letting me know when she’s confused or sad, for example. Somehow it’s a way to sort something out in a way he’s better able to understand.