Caregiver, What It Means

I was very lucky to find several people to assist me as caregivers to care for my dear wife over the last 8-10 months of her life. Caregivers for loved ones with this horrible disease that brings us all here are quite special in my opinion. To be a successful caregiver for one with this disease requires more of the individual than caring for a physically impaired person who retains all their mental faculties. I wrote this for those special people who enabled me to fulfill my promise to my dear wife. I thought I would just share it here in case you have found similar support.

CAREGIVER

Caregiver, a title so easily claimed or tossed around

What makes up the qualities of this special noun

Many take upon the title with very little thought

As if what it means is something that can be bought

For those special few who deserve to truly wear this mantle

Sadly there are so many imposters who cannot hold a candle

This word demands giving to others all that you have every day

You cannot take a break, you must be ever vigilant, no time for a vaca

The ones who, without seeking acclaim, are there through thick and thin

They are the ones who give and give their all, and still show up again

For many their heart drives them to service, even when the reward is low

And yet, here they are, one more day to serve, taking the burden without show

C stands for the Compassion a true caregiver displays every day, in every way

A stands for the Attitude shown in a positive way regardless the burden

R stands for Resilience needed to face the pain and yet return

E stands for Effort that is required of every minute to meet the needs of their charge

G stands for Generosity as they give their all to the comfort of another

I stands for Integrity shown in building the trust of the patient and family

V stands for the Values imbedded in their soul, not trained into their role

E stands for the Effort demanded minute to minute to adapt

R stands for the Respect shown at every turn regardless the challenge

And for the ones who deserve to hold the title in honor, there are those among you who rise to a level above. Being a Caregiver for anyone is a role to be held in high regard. Being a Caregiver for someone losing and/or lost to the nightmare of Alzheimer/Dementia and its’ related forms demands a few more descriptors.

Adaptability may be one of the singular requirements for this Caregiver. Caring for a charge whose life, behaviors, language, memory, health can change minute to minute demands adapting to their needs unexpectedly. This caregiver role does not follow the standard protocols and, yet, must meet or exceed the required high standards expected. Managing the adaptability demanded eliminates any semblance or normal or routine and, yet again, maintaining routine is necessary. Versatility might be another key descriptor for one who is willing to undertake the role of caregiver for the AD patient. Living in a world with your charge where anything can happen and often nothing is predictable requires a mental attitude that can accept spontaneous change, find a solution and maintain the comfort of your charge.

For the one who takes on the title of Caregiver, you step into a role of angel, healer, friend, counselor, protector, manager, and so many other descriptors at any given moment.