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Hospice/burned out.

My DW is in hospice now. She doesn't really understand what is happening to her. She doesn't eat regularly and doesn't sleep. Her skin is turning a yellowish color. She can only stand up to use her walker if someone is there to help lift her, then she can take 3 to 4 steps before sitting down. The care home is wonderful for her. They only have 4 women and all of them have some degree of Dementia. It's so hard to see her every day. All she can do is sit on the couch and lean into me so I can hold her. She says she feels safe when I hold her. She doesn't much other than to please hold and stay with me. This is so hard. I hate Dementia.

Comments

  • Goodlife2025
    Goodlife2025 Member Posts: 306
    250 Likes 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Care Reactions 100 Comments
    Member

    There are not enough words to describe this agony called dementia. Hold her close Big Papa sometimes it is all we can do……

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 3,193
    1,500 Likes 1,000 Insightfuls Reactions 2500 Comments 1,000 Care Reactions
    Member

    So sorry. Keep talking to her and telling her you love her. Hugs. 💜

  • SDianeL
    SDianeL Member Posts: 3,193
    1,500 Likes 1,000 Insightfuls Reactions 2500 Comments 1,000 Care Reactions
    Member

    yes. It’s common. Keep talking to her. She can hear you. 💜🙏

  • TMCMNJ
    TMCMNJ Member Posts: 6
    5 Likes 5 Care Reactions First Comment
    Member

    it’s the worst. I think that’s all I would (will?) want. Just someone to hold me. It must mean the world to her

  • Karen711
    Karen711 Member Posts: 249
    100 Care Reactions 100 Likes 100 Comments Second Anniversary
    Member

    Hang in there Big Papa! I hope you have someone around you who can give you support as you are showing up so amazingly for your dear wife. If not a relative or dear friend to bring you a meal or take a walk with you, hospice will have a chaplain that can meet with you regularly, and you may find some energy and comfort in that. Sending you a big hug!!!

    💜

  • sherryandwilliam
    sherryandwilliam Member Posts: 63
    100 Care Reactions 25 Likes 10 Comments First Anniversary
    Member

    it is the saddest hardest to see your spouse suffer for years. And the end stage is especially hard

  • sherryandwilliam
    sherryandwilliam Member Posts: 63
    100 Care Reactions 25 Likes 10 Comments First Anniversary
    Member

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more