Only a few months in...

Tross760

But, I feel so darn* lonely. I want love and support but don’t ask, Covid sucks. Some people will ask how things are but then say, “ oh my gosh, I know right???” 

Very few people get this, like really get it. You learn who friends are so fast.... 

just feeling like pitiful pearl tonight. Wanted to whine a little. 

MimiMinder

I just wanted to reach out this morning and let you know that you are not alone. Well meaning friends who don't have a loved one battling dementia have no clue. Even the most empathetic folks just cannot fathom what we do on a daily basis. Whether it's providing care in our homes or being their advocates when they are elsewhere, it is a tough job. And it doesn't get easier. But reaching out on the forum helps ease the burden.

Know that many of us are out here on the forum anytime you want to share!

Big virtual hug!

Tross760

Not sure how to make the quote thing work, but thank you! This truly is a wretched disease and every day I am shocked by it. I am glad I have a place to come here, research and share.

Wilted Daughter

"We must embrace pain and burn it as fuel for our journey"

- Kenji Miyazawa

mevns

My dad moved in with me Nov. 29 after his died of cancer. He has dementia and according to what I read, I believe he's somewhere in the middle stage of the disease. I never realized exactly how much it would affect our life 24/7. It is much like caring for a child, but you lose even more freedom. A child you can often take with you or find a sitter, but it's not quite that easy with a parent with dementia. I do pretty well, but I am also feeling a lot of stress. I pray a lot and try to trust in God!

Ginsamae

All of understand what you are feeling. I have been primary caregiver for my MIL since she moved in with us in April 2019. DH finally worked out a "sharing the caring" system with 2 of his other siblings and we got her back last week after her spending the holidays with Sib #1. We will fly with MIL to Sib #3 later this month and she will stay there until the end of April. 

Even DH's siblings who claimed to know what was going on with MIL have been shocked to find how much their life stopped once she came to them for the "sharing of the caring." It is much harder, I think, to care for an adult with dementia than it is for a child...even a teenager isn't as hard. She's only been back with us for a week and I'm already physically and mentally drained.

Tross760

Sharing the caring! What a great concept. My brother has been estranged from the family for years since married his “lovely” wife.... he has yet to call her since any of this all began. I was mad, and sometimes get that way still- but don’t have time to waste on him. He will have to live with himself later.... so, it is just me (and hubby and son) to take care of mom....

Ginsamae

Hi Tross - I'm sorry that you don't have the family support you will need. DH has 5 siblings and once he told them we could no longer be the sole caregiver only 2 stepped in to help. The first one just brought her back to us and complained that their life was "on hold" for the 6 weeks they had her (I had to bite my tongue to keep from saying that ours was "on hold" for 16 months!!). The other one will get her later this month. I'm sure it will be an eye opening experience for them as well.  I'm going to enjoy the "sharing of the caring" for as long as I can for I feel this arrangement won't last very long.