Grandmother keeps trying to give dog harmful things

alliisawesome

In order to make sure that my grandmother eats a proper meal and that she takes her medicine*, my mom and her siblings each take a few nights a week with her. When we have Grandmom**, mealtime is an issue. She insists on feeding my dog human food. I often put a baggie of his kibble on the table, but she’ll keep on feeding him human food even when asked, even denying that she’s feeding him. (It doesn’t help that my dad also insists on feeding him human food, but that’s it’s own issue).

Tonight, however, she gave him part of a white chocolate cookie despite being asked not to, and she tried to give him her medicine. When my mom expressed her displeasure, my grandmom held out her now-empty hand as if to do it again. My mom and I talked, and we decided to not let her eat chocolate at our house and to carefully supervise her when she takes her medicine, but is there anything else we can do? We lost our dog of fifteen years in December 2018, so I’m very overprotective of him. Thank you!

*We tried an automatic medicine dispenser, but that didn’t work.

**With the exception of Wednesdays, as that’s litter night.

star26

You can use a baby gate to keep your dog out of the kitchen/dining area when your grandmother is visiting.  And don't serve snacks or meds in any other location.

BassetHoundAnn

I'm so very sorry about the loss of your dog of many years Alliissawesome. I can certainly understand how you want to be extra-vigilant and protective of your current best friend. They are such an important part of our lives and our hearts! 

We have the very same problems with my mom and our dogs. She not only feeds them food from the table when we're not looking, but she'll grab things from the pantry shelves and refrigerator. One day we found that she had fed an entire bag of donuts to the dogs. Another day we found she had cleaned out the dog treat shelf in the pantry and fed them all, every box, every container, to the dogs! She denies it of course. She has no memory of any of it. One time we gave her a small container of dog treats to give to the dogs to appease her need to feed them something--and she ate them herself! 

You have several options in addition to supervising her very closely whenever she's around your dog. There are locks one can purchase for the refrigerator and cupboards that are "Alzheimer's proof." You can keep your dog away from her whenever she's over. A baby gate is an excellent solution. 

One issue with my mom is that her appetite mechanism is fading, as happens to many dementia sufferers. When confronted with a plate full of food she often doesn't want it so she finds ways of secretly disposing of it. Like a small child worried about adult displeasure of the plate isn't cleaned. Slipping food to the dogs under the table is an easy disposal method. Something like that might be going on with your grandma. The easiest solution is to keep your dog far away from her whenever she has food of any sort, especially during dinner.

Something else to keep in mind: My mom would sometimes hide food in her purse, like cookies. Then she would leave her purse on the floor and the dogs would dig into it to get the food when no one else was looking. She would also hide food in her coat pockets, and again that would be an easy target for the dogs if she left her coat on a chair or bed. 

Medication is something to be especially vigilant about. A friend lost her dog when he got into the backpack of a family member and consumed the medication it contained. Many dogs are also attracted to the scent and taste of ibuprofen and ibuprofen is particularly fatal to dogs. So you should be extra-extra-vigilant about what medications your grandmother might be leaving about. And you should keep an eye on her purse, coat and any garment with pockets that she might leave laying around and which your dog might get into if it contains something attractive. 

I'm sorry that you have to go through this. It's very frustrating. You should discuss your worries with your parents and get them both on board with a plan to keep your dog safe from grandmother's handouts and medication. It's a problem that the whole family needs to tackle together. Good luck! You've found a good place to vent and get advice. 

[Deleted User]

The user and all related content has been deleted.

harshedbuzz

Piling on to what Victoria said. I would be much more concerned about what transpires during the time grandmother is home alone. Is she not taking or doubling up on her daytime medications? Is she mailing in donations to questionable charities? Sharing personal information with phone scammers? Is she bathing, eating breakfast and lunch? Is she wandering at night?

And while it's great, and sadly unusual, for siblings to be sharing in the care of a PWD it might be better for grandmother to have a more set routine in one place at some point soon.

As for the dog, secure him in his crate or another room while she's there.