Loved one refuses to drink water

mariaperezhuff0212

My LO refuses to drink water, is at 3a CKD, chronic diabetic, legs swelling profusely yet refuses and takes off her compression socks.  Constant battle to remind her or put a glass of water in front of her to drink as it turns into an argument.  Have been advised to give her drip drops or liquid IV however, LO will not drink anything with flavor as in her mind it then has sugar but is quick to take my daughter's fruit snacks.  Anyone dealing or has dealt with this issue.  Is complaining that her kidneys are hurting her.   

Thanks in advanced for any and all guidance. 

MPH 

MN Chickadee

That's rough. It sounds like even Crystal Light or an artificial sweetener wouldn't help.  Does she like hot tea? What about changing up the way it's presented? Try with and without ice, with a straw, warmed in a mug maybe with a slice of lemon to look pretty, a water bottle, a super cool colorful straw cup like kids would enjoy? Try to avoid making it a reminder or battle, and more of an invitation. Maybe make it an occasion, a tea party where you sit together and drink a cup with doilies on your saucers? I know my LO would have liked messing with a tea pot and filling her cup herself in the earlier stages of dementia. Hope you find something that helps.

Teachertee

Maybe try sugar free ice pops? Diet sodas?  Diet Snapple with fun flavors?Not straight water, but could help getting more fluids.  My mother is diabetic and we always had these in the house.  

I like the suggestions about the tea party or fancy presentation.  Maybe a smoothie? Food coloring?

As a teacher, I have used the forced choice / decision making on students... Works most of the time with young children.  My mom surely used this with us as kids to eat oatmeal for breakfast.  What color would you like your oatmeal today?

Fluid ideas:

Would you like your drink in the blue cup or the green cup? 

What color would you like your rainbow drink today?

Would you like to drink your drink in the bedroom or kitchen?

Hope something works out.

Jane Smith

Hi Maria and welcome.  Sorry you need to be here, but you are very welcome. 

Diabetes is hard. Dementia is hard. The combination is REALLY hard. 

You have gotten some good suggestions. Some caregivers report that they are able to increase fluid intake by offering foods with a lot of water content. Brothy soups, cucumber, lettuce, fruits like watermelon, and so on. 

Not all of these ideas will work for you of course. And so often with dementia, what works one day (or moment), does not work the next. It can be so frustrating. 

 https://dailycaring.com/6-ideas-to-get-seniors-to-drink-more-water/

jfkoc

I would buy bottler water and say to her that you understand her concern about what is in a glass of water. I would hand her a bottle to check then offer her a straw. She might drink more with a straw

She may also drink more if you sit down with her and have a "drink break". We could all drink more water and how nice to have a drink and a visit.

Lydia1330

My mom hates water. Mom likes decaf coffee, tea and lemonade. I’m always drinking something and when I take a drink I ask mom to take a drink. She forgets to drink or eat.

LicketyGlitz

I don't know if this would be of service to you, maria, but have you heard of water blobs? Or Jelly Drops? Jelly drops were specifically designed for dementia folks to boost water intake, but as of yet they are only available in the UK - got any friends in Britain who'll get a box and ship to you to try? They anticipate being able to ship to the U.S. by this summer.

Here's their website: https://www.jellydrops.com/

There is a company making edible water pods called Ooho Water but they are not in full-scale production yet.

It sounds like these could be good options once they are available for market.

Actually, if you did want to test out the Jelly Drops I bet someone on the Alzheimer's Society UK forums would help you out! After all we're all caregivers on all continents! Their equivalent to Alzconnected is called Talking Point.

Here's their forum: https://www.alzheimers.org.uk/get-support/dementia-talking-point-our-online-community

abc123

Sorry you are having this problem. How about putting a few small pieces of fresh fruit in a glass of water. Such as a couple small slices of a strawberry or lemon or lime. Tell her it's the new way to stay healthy and her favorite movie star is doing it. Or her favorite relative or friend. Anybody but you. Good luck!

star26

Broths and soups with meals, in addition to the other suggestions?  It's not great sugar-wise, but maybe watermelon or grapes would interest her instead of the dried fruit snacks?

Mint

Maria you have got plenty of good suggestions.  Do the best you can.  If you are still unable to get her to do it, don’t beat yourself up.  All we can do is the best we can.  My mom is totally medically noncompliant.  Have just totally detached about it and accepted it.  May have been a little easier for me because as a health care worker dealt with this a lot.  Most patients appreciated your help but was always a few who just weren’t able to do as they needed to do.  There I had to learn to accept it and whatever happens, happens.  I had tried.  The two issues you are dealing with water intake and compression socks are things that people frequently weren’t compliant with even when they didn’t have dementia.

Take care

harshedbuzz

MPH-

You've gotten some good advice, but I think it might also be helpful to get to what is driving the refusal in order to narrow down a plan to overcome it.

You mention that she's taking off her compression socks. Is this a function of her dementia- i.e. that anosognosia has caused her to believe she doesn't need them or perhaps the loss of executive function that parses the consequences of her actions. Perhaps this same dementia-thinking is also driving the drinking issue.

This is a common enough issue for caregivers. My dad was reluctant to drink. In his case, I think a piece of it was looking to avoid trips to the bathroom- he didn't move so well by the late middle stages. 

Sometimes the drinking was a toddler-like power struggle that also impacted taking his medication or eating. There wasn't much in life he could control (and he was a control freak by nature). He only had the ability to say "no" and exercised it often. Sometimes it was best to leave the pills/water/sandwich with him, leave the room, and hope he'd forget we wanted him to take it. 

A number of people here who have been sandwich caregivers (elderly parent/grandparent and younger children) have reported a sort of perverse situation in which their PWD "competed" with the young child for attention and resources. If this is at the root of the theft of the fruit snacks, you might be able to trick her into drinking if she thinks it's meant for the child. 

Other people have had issues with a PWD thinking they are being poisoned or harmed by food/drink offered them. Thinking there's sugar in flavored water sounds like maybe this applies to her. Sometime "sharing" a treat together can overcome their fear. You might come up with a drink that could be shared by the two of you- a fancy tea, sparking water with fruit slices. I would not offer a straw or sports bottle unless she has been cleared by a SLP swallow study. It can be easy to aspirate food or saliva which can lead to pneumonia. 

You can also sneak hydration into her diet with things like cucumbers, melon, citrus, soups, smoothies, Jello, ice pops.

Marta

Just for a little peace of mind, CKD does not hurt.

Cynbar

My DH also takes off his compression socks ---- he says they are very uncomfortable, and by the looks of them, I bet they are. I've pretty much given up that battle, it's mostly about comfort at this time and I don't want to be nagging him all the time which neither of us enjoys. I've worked harder on getting him to elevate his legs and he is more willing to do that. Sometimes we have to pick our battles.

He also is reluctant to drink enough. I have had good luck buying the small cans of club soda and ginger ale. He does better when the liquid is very cold and fizzy, the small cans are just the right size so it won't get warm and flat. You've gotten a lot of ideas in this thread, hopefully some of them will help in your situation.

Hope21

Hi,

I just signed up with ALZ connection. I am also dealing with the drinking and swallowing refusals with my mother. As her ability to swallow has worsened, the drinking has declined.  I usually feed  her jello, unsweetened applesauce, and home-made fruit smoothies.  Other time, I can just change the color of the cup, or glass she is using and this will help. When I put too much pressure, she will refuse. Then I need someone else to offer her the drink and she will usually accept and drink. It is definitely a juggling act.