Lost in Plain Sight

JM1316

Morning!

My DH lost his good glasses over a week ago.  He thought they were lost in the bedroom.  I found them today on a large glass patio table in our Sun Room near our sliding glass door.  He put them there when he took our dog out back.  He has been in and out that door several times since losing the glasses.

On Christmas Day I picked out a shirt for him to wear, showed it to him & placed just inside the closet for him to find easily.  I left to get dressed myself and found him wearing a different shirt that was nowhere near the one I picked out.  I just told him he looked nice.

Him mom had Alz and would hang her clothes on the closet door knob and eventually hang her winter coat on the coat closet door know.  This was before her diagnosis.

So I call this “lost in plain sight!”

I recognize my husband’s behavior is following his mom’s behavior.  So I feel I will not be too surprised with his progress in this disease and therefore I can make a better plan for us in the future. 

Have a great day,

Dottie

Paul&Me

I think it is pretty common. What's worse is when my husband won't tell me what he's looking for, just keeps looking. He doesn't want to give up an inch before he has to, and asking me for help finding something is giving up a lot, in his mind. Sometimes I can guess what he's looking for, but not always.

Yes, I think the best response is, "You look nice." Live in the moment.

M1

Oh this is a daily occurence at our house.  Clearly she can't process the visual or audio information about an object to identify that that's what she's looking for.  Yesterday it was her purse (by her desk), a propane tank (next to the car in the garage), a magazine (on the dining room table), and a cat food bowl (on the counter in the kitchen).  All RIGHT THERE.   And she no longer knows what drawers or closets things live in--even though they've lived there for the 12 years we've been in this house.  She'll say "what drawer are the knives in?"  and if a tell her "the middle drawer on the kitchen island" she still can't find it, I have to get up and show her.  Frustrating, but I try not to show it because then it just makes her feel bad.

Michael_Jet

M1, I completely identify with your post. "The charger cord? It goes in the second drawer down here at the end of the island. No, not the white spice drawer, the black drawer in the island. The island...turn around...down here at the end. A little further. First drawer is fine"

And yet if I hide a check I need to put in the bank under a shirt in my closet she will find it within 24 hours. Go figure. 

billS

My wife is constantly hiding her purse from all those imaginary people that come through our house (yeah right). I bought a wireless "key finder" from Amazon and attached one receiver to her purse so I can hit the remote and follow the beeping sound. Unfortunately if she hides it under lots of blankets or deep in a drawer full of clothes my 72 year old ears can't hear the beep very well. Link to the device here: https://www.amazon.com/dp/B078XR8C15?psc=1&ref=ppx_pop_dt_b_product_details

French

Searching things, a long story. 4 years ago (2 years before diagnosis) before going to the office, my partner couldn’t find his bag (almost everyday). I was searching it and funding it. And then I also left the house. Once leaving I found the bag on the trash in the street. I tried to call him... the phone was in the bag. This kind of story was quite everyday or every week... I should have guess.

Now he search things but also doesn’t explain what. I suspect that while searching he forgets what he his searching.

Last week I could hear him stirring it all up in a basement closet. Then it stopped. When I arrived everything was upside down. The mountain campons and the ice axe out (we live near the sea but far from the mountains). When I asked him what he was doing, he answered that he wanted to check that he had his crampons in case... in case or what? I think he hasn't used them for 30 years. 

Before it was the headlamp.

I think that my partner spend more time searching unnecessary things than what he really needs. 

 I bought him a bag in which the important things to go out must always be: keys, mask, papers, a little money. It took a long time to put it in place but he quickly understood that it allowed him not to spend his time looking for it and it works well now!

JM1316

I enjoyed reading all your responses.  We are all on this adventure together, with minor differences.  

You all take care of yourselves!

Dottie

Iris L.

JM1316 wrote:

So I call this “lost in plain sight!”

The medical term for this is visual agnosia.  

I wear a chain on my eyeglasses to help keep from losing them.  

Iris L.

JM1316

Iris,

Thank you for the terminology, I had no idea.  I will read up on it.

Dottie