First Appointment with Neurologist- What to expect

Nancy B21

We have our first appointment this month with a neuro and I don;t know what to expect.  She has been referred by our elder doctor and has an MRI from a few years ago.  She has been acting out and angry at me so not even sure how I will get her there but not sure what to expect.  Can they give her anything to make her not so anxious and angry?  Does a diagnosis help?  Thank you!!

SweeT97

Hello,

I took my grandmother to her first appointment with a neurologist(from he Alzheimer's center) last year and I actually had to trick her by saying it was a different doctors appointment to get her in there. I also promised her that we would get her favorite milkshake after so that helped. The doctor asssitant ran some cognitive tests on her in another room while I was able to tell him my concerns and what was going on with her. I was grateful for this because my grandmother would get angry when I would explain to other doctors that she was hallucinating in front of her . 

I'd say to expect to answer lot of questions and jot down questions that you may have for the doctor. After I left, I realized that I still had questions to ask such as "What should we expect next? What stage of dementia is she in? etc. The doctor prescribed a nighttime medication that would calm her but he said nothing will completely get rid of the dementia. Four months later I can say that he was spot on the nighttime medicine makes her sleepy but she still see's things that are not there during the day foe the most part. 

I wish you well with your loved one's appointment.

Nancy B21

Thank you so much.  I hate that we do have to trick them now, but I am starting to understand it is the only way and that we are really just entering their reality.  I may tell her he may give us the okay to get her keys back-- IDK.  I hope I can figure it out.  I really appreciate the advice as far as asking next steps etc from him.  My mom has just made me the villain and thinks it is my fault I we had to take her keys.  I think this disease magnifies their true essence-- and my mom deep down was always anxious and this makes it worse.  

I miss her.

Thank you so much.

LaurenB

NancyB21, I'd caution you about using the return of driving privileges as bate.  I wouldn't want to give my LO hope for something that I know is a huge safety issue.  I've posed the drs appointments as "let's see if the doctor has some suggestions on how to make you feel better."

Lauren

LUBY2883

I am a caregiver for my wife. We went through the anger about 6 months ago. We found changing her dementia meds completely turned her around to calm and relatively happy. Most of all reassuring her that everything is ok because you are there for her and will never leave her. Food and water especially water for calming. Hydration is best medicine for keeping her physically comfortable. They don't always know what's bothering them Lastly keep her clean. Nothing more annoying to them than dirty briefs or * Depends. It's tough but radiate joy. They know when you're annoyed. Don't worry about a tomorrow or regret the past, stay in the now, today. It has enough problems of it's own. But always stay in tune with your nurse or Dr. They can keep you up to date on what's happening and how to deal with it. There is always a solution. But quality of her life is the goal. Your nurse may have a green book about end of life with Alzheimer's, "A PATH TO COMFORT"..

pzeller2

Nancy B21 - your story sounds exactly like how my Dad's (PWD) first neurologist appointment went. He refused to go, saying there was nothing wrong despite his doctor's insistence that he go, and soon. He would get incredibly angry at me and start shouting at me. This is a man who, up until that point, I don't think I ever heard him raise his voice even when I was a child. 

 I had to "trick" him into going by saying we were going to see his doctor. That got him in the car. He was compliant at that point but I could tell very nervous. This was suggested to me by the AA and they call them "therapeutic fibs." 

The actual appointment was the neurologist giving a MMSE, which my dad scored 1/30. The neurologist recommended him get an MRI but I was never able to take my dad to one. I took my dad to his PCP and she told him point blank - "You have dementia." Dad kept saying "No I don't." 

This was incredibly frustrating and perplexing to me. My dad was a very logical person. He has a PhD, he taught technical courses, and lead a technology division at a large high school system before his retirement 15 years ago. 

I mention this story because I brought it up when I made another call to the AA. The person I talked to told me about "Anosognosia." They told me it was not my dad be stubborn, it was the dementia had started to affect the portions of his brain that allow him to change his self image. That made a lot of sense because my dad would never have been one to disregard a doctors direct diagnosis. 

Shortly after all this happened, my dad had a few incidents where one landed him in the hospital and I eventually had him moved to a full time MC.

windyshores

I cannot imagine a doctor telling a patient that he or she has dementia. We never ever tell my mother she has dementia.

I wonder if someone can evaluate your mother in her home, due to COVID.