I think Peewee is at the stage where he no longer wants to.

ladypeewee

Change clothes or take showers, and can't tell when it's to cold for a light jacket. If I say something to him about he needs to shower he says he just had a shower yesterday. He has not taken one for over a month now. If I tell him to change his clothes he will put on a pair of shorts. He wears the same light jacket day in and day out. He sleeps in this same jacket. When He goes out to check the mail. When it's 32 degrees I tell him to put on his heavy coat. He says it's not cold enough for the heavy coat.Until he comes back in the house. then he says I should have put on the heavy coat. I am just too tired to fight with him about it. I don't know how to handle this one. He as a doctors appointment on the 18th with his nero doctor. and I will be on vacation. That week .

Ed1937

When you say you will be on vacation, does that mean you will not be with him? The doctor needs to know what is going on. If you can't accompany him to his appointment, send a note to the doctor, so he knows what's happening. You can only go so long without bathing, or your skin will break down, and other things could be at play too.

ladypeewee

I was tired when I wrote this post. I should have said I will be on vacation from work so I can be home with peewee the week he has his Doctors appointment.

LadyTexan

Hello Lady.

My DH is starting to shun showers. I can tell he does not want to get the water on his face, so I am looking for a solution. I may try to watch some TeepaSnow videos for tips. My DH also is not brushing his teeth consistently. He will claim he already brushed them. DH is resisting me for haircuts and shaving as well.

My DH also has trouble regulating his body heat. It seems he is always cold. He was running the heater at 80 degrees and our electric bill was out of this world. I have taken more control of the thermostat as I frett how to pay the giant utility bill.

I feel overwhelmed and frustrated often. I am very tired too. Please hang in there and know that we are here for you.

I am glad you will be able to attend PeeWee's doctor appointment with him. 

Take care - 

LT

Ed1937

Just a few of things I've heard about showers: 

1. They might feel as though they will drown, so keep the water from going on the face.

2. The water might feel too hot or too cold. Regulate the water before they get in.

3. If the floor is dark, they might see that as a hole, and don't want to step on it.

4. They might feel as though they will go down the drain. This probably is more for a tub.

5. They might feel cold when they step out of the tub/shower. Make sure the room is very warm.

6. Make the area inviting to them. Warm. Music. Aroma therapy.

7. Shower should be soft running. Too much pressure can hurt or be uncomfortable.

8. Don't allow them to adjust how hot it is unless your water heater is set below 120 degrees. This will prevent scalding.

9. Use a non slip mat on the shower floor.

10. And certainly use grab bars.

11. A shower seat might be called for.

eaglemom

Ed your suggestions are spot on. Good job!!

I know many struggle with the shower issue. You can make it as inviting and soothing as possible. I know I don't like to be cold getting into or out of the shower. You just never know the 'why' your LO doesn't want to take one. Encourage them is the best you can do.

eagle

Jo C.

No suggesting; no asking, no telling - now need to be his guide - get shower room ready and warm; towel and clean underwear ready; then simply say, "I have the shower ready for us - AND after we are done, we will have (name a treat such as a piece of cake, pie, cookies, candy, etc.) then simply guide him and go with him to the room and get water ready and assist with undressing if that is necessary.  Keep talking in soft positive voice during process to slightly distract. Then afterward, be sure to get the treat promptly so he feels the reward associated with showering.   Might be worth a try.  He cannot make such decisions for himself anymore; needs to be a guided experience.

Also, as for his wearing shorts in 32 degree weather - simply remove shorts from dresser or closet - hide them in another place leaving his longer pants or sweat pants in their place. Sweat pants are soft and comfortable.

Same for his lightweight jacket since he wears it outside in freezing weather.  If hidden out of his sight and only his warm jacket is left, he will have no alternative.  If he wonders where his lightweight jacket it is, another fiblet is in order.

Peewee is far past the ability to use good judgment and reasoning or logic. It is now about smoke and mirrors; subtle fiblets and being the guide.

As for your leaving work, it is not only a decision made with caring emotion; you really would benefit from some objective professional advice re finances and how to best situate and protect yourself and all that will come in the future.

Best wishes; let us know how you are doing, we will be thinking of you,

J.