Mother-in-law says she is just going to die if she has to stay in nursing homr.

September Remember

Mother-in-law kept falling, incontinent, chronic weight loss  past two years-down to 84 lbs, roaming at night, Dementia worse after COVID. I could no longer care for her and keep her safe after 5 years. She was in hospital with COVID  then nursing home isolation for a month. She is mad she can’t come home and says she might as well die. She has already nearly quit eating, thrown a tray. We can inly visit behind a plexiglass box due to COVID safety mandates. I fear she is now going to quit eating on purpose and will herself to death. Not sure if anything can be done.

harshedbuzz

SR-

I am sorry for your MIL and the situation in which you find yourself.

That must be hard to hear, but it does sounds as though she has progressed to a point where she really can make choices logically. Perhaps she would be more settled if you posted her current SNF stay as something her doctor ordered until she's feeling stronger.

HB

September Remember

Thank you. She has always been demanding and narcissistic. We have told her she is too sick but does not matter. I just cringe that this is her final manipulation.

dayn2nite2

As you know, she will not die due to placement.  She’ll be mad and upset.  Weather the storm, she will adjust.  Do not take her out on an outing or to visit anyone for a year.  Seriously.

Quilting brings calm

She won’t die due to placement.  This is her version of a toddler holding her breath. 

Now, I’m not saying what the future holds in terms of her illness.  None of us know how long she or anyone else has.  But if something should happen DO NOT feel guilty for placing  her where she could be taken care of by a staff 24/7.

September Remember

dayn2night2 due to COVID safety restrictions there are no outings. She had it before she entered home and was in isolation for 4 weeks. Visits are done with the resident in a plexiglass box in a porch and family outside the box.

September Remember

quilting brings calm

I have no guilt but am somewhat angry at yet another of her life long manipulative behaviors. I told hubby he will do visits. I will no longer be her victim.