Trying to fit cleaning around people who are always around

KawKaw

I posted another message about being glad my FIL with dementia is finally living with us.

I am.  Very much so.

It has been challenging to complete my household chores with my spouse working from home. 

Now that my FIL is here too, I'm needing to adjust my cleaning routines and not succeeding.

One crinkle in the issue is that I am disabled and also have mild cognitive impairment, which can affect my ability to focus and can impair my executive functioning.

I am best able to focus and accomplish anything from 5am to 2pm.

After that, my cognition begins to become less dependable.

I can achieve tasks after that time, but it takes me a lot longer and I am scattered.  It is unpleasant.

I am thinking that if I got cleaning assistance once a week or every two weeks, that would help a lot.

However, my FIL has not yet been vaccinated.  He has refused and might consent when my spouse is eligible to be vaccinated as well.

We have been isolating except for my spouse going to my FIL's house these months since July.  My FIL has been isolating as well.

I am anxious about having someone in the house after being so very careful this year.

This is an issue that will not be quickly resolved.

I can do my best in the meantime.

It would be easier if my spouse and his father weren't the type to perpetually spill things!  I knew that before I got married, though.  : )

LaurenB

I can appreciate your situation of not wanting others to come in since you guys aren't vaccinated.  It's also really hard to keep a house cleaned when everyone is always there.  Other than suggesting that you all go and stay in one room while the cleaning crew comes and then moving out of that room while the crew finishes up with the final room I would say to wait until you have had the opportunity to get vaccinated.  Once your household has had the opportunity to be vaccinated (whether they do it or not) then the cleaners can come in.  Getting the vaccine (or not) is a personal decision.  Let your family know that you can't go on like this once they have the opportunity to get the vaccine.  It will be up to them to get the shot or not, but it is not up for negotiation about getting someone to come and help carry your burden.  Husband and FIL can choose to use the above scenario or they could go for an hour drive.  You need the help and they can choose how to help you.  Either get the shot and let the cleaners in or don't get the shot and vacate the house while they come in.  Sorry for the strong response.  I'm sick and tired of the mess at my house with 3 kids, 2 dogs, 1 husband working from home, and a pandemic.

Wilted Daughter

Until the vaccine issue is addressed can you schedule cleaning in early am when others are sleeping? Mom sleeps late and I rise early, make coffee, and clean up/clear out anything from the previous day. When she comes down stairs then I can work on the upstairs. 

It's been working so far only because she is not on the same floor that I clean. People cannot be in the same room or area you are cleaning it's a golden  rule. 

Don't stress do what you can when you feel like it. Maybe you can have a family member come help once a week when others are sleeping in so more can get done (i.e. 7am - 9am).

Exhale it will be okay and you'll get what needs to be done completed when necessary. 

KawKaw

Thank you both for the support and suggestions.

Working on not becoming too anxious is probably the most important thing.

My spouse sleeps in on the weekends, but works starting at 6am during the week.

Sometimes, my FIL sleeps in, but he sleeps in the family room which is open to the kitchen.

Sometimes, we are all up at 5am.

I think it will get easier after more people have a chance to be vaccinated.

My spouse and I are in a tier that has not yet begun vaccinations.

Bathroom accidents keep me busy, though I'm getting faster at completing clean up.

I am so grateful that I can still usually get my daily run and exercise.  It is a stress-reliever.