Staying in touch from a distance with LO in nursing home

kaytheyoshi

Hello,

My grandmother who has Alzheimers/dementia was recently admitted to a nursing home (previously was living with my grandfather who was her caretaker). She lives across the country from me. I want to stay in touch with her. I called and talked to her on the phone a few weeks ago and expected that it would be difficult to talk to her on the phone and it was. I want to be better prepared for future phone conversations with her. I know I need to take more of the lead of carrying the conversation and avoid asking her a lot of questions. I can't wrap my head around doing this - I'm looking for conversation starters, topics to talk about, tips/tricks, etc. I've done some research online but just am not finding anything that resonates with me. In general, I am introverted and typically don't talk much around my extended family.

Suggestions welcome!

Thanks!

King Boo

How wonderful that you cherish the relationship with your grandmother.

Depending on what stage she is, she may have 'good' days, and not so on days.  

Sometimes, if another family member is visiting her, they can help orient her to the phone call.

If conversation doesn't flow, it's not your fault, it's just where she is at in function that day.

Some PWD reach the point where they don't understand phone calls anymore - sometimes phone calls are a cause of problems or agitation for the PWD.  Until she is at that point, just an "I'm thinking of you and I love you"  goes a long way.

A day in the future may come when phone calls are not productive and she forgets people.  This is a function of the disease and no reflection on your relationship at all.  One day at a time.