And the beat goes on...

LicketyGlitz

... specifically, Mom's beat. And frankly we've all gotten to the point where we wish she'd knock it off.

We're close...

https://www.stumpedtowndementia.com/post/we-re-close

p.s. I just read all the comments on my last thread and I am honored that you all would lift a glass when Mom passes. Perhaps this is a new tradition, a new way to support each other at the end of the caregiver road.

p.p.s. Here is the Man in the Arena speech Diane referred to (again on the last thread), and I agree with her, replacing "man" with the word "caregiver" pretty much sums up the everyday heroes we are, even with all the tarnish on our beaten and battered breastplates.

http://www.worldfuturefund.org/Documents/maninarena.htm

StayCalm

Lickety

So sorry this final step is just at a standstill.  Your Mom seems to want to"Have the last word" And make her farewell in her time, not following the expected timing.  My prayers and thoughts are with you each day.  We will have our wine ready.  Yes, it would be a good tradition to start in recognition of a long hard journey completed.

RobOT

Lickety, so glad you have the company/help of others right now.  You've given and helped the rest of us so much, your honesty and humor are priceless.  Keeping all of you in my thoughts, one of which, by the way, is that you guys must be pretty entertaining for her to keep hanging on.  Stay strong, you can do this for your mom.

abc123

Sending His peace & love to everyone at Stumped Town.

Jane Smith

Hey LG,

I was just wondering how you are all doing and just read your latest update.  Wow! doesn’t even begin to cover it.

I am so glad that you have the Other Girl, MotherMinder, the Boyfriend in the Basement, these ridiculously tall grandsons, hospice, and everyone else, on your team.

We send them our good thoughts and wishes as well as to you. 

Keep breathing.   We can’t be in the room with you at the house, but we are here in the virtual room with you. Keep breathing.  

Abuela

Hi Lickety.  You are in my thoughts and prayers as you go through this.  

I will only add that mom was 'near the end' but I was told... could be today or could be tomorrow or a week from now.  As you did, I told her good bye. I told her it was okay to go.  The priest came for last rites.  No one else came... covid restrictions kept my siblings away.  So I went home figuring that I would  be back in the morning.  I got into my car and the radio was playing .... "Much too late for Goodbyes" by John Lennon.  Seriously ... of all the songs....I took a snapshot of the display on my dashboard because I knew that no one would believe me.  she died two hours later.  I figure the priest told her to "Go with God" and she obeyed.  She always listened more to men than to me.   It's all good. 

 Hang in there and thanks so much for sharing such a private journey with those who need to understand it.   

mommyandme (m&m)

The vividity in which you share your experience and feelings is amazing.  I feel like I’m there with you laughing, crying and stressing in your home with all your familial acronyms. But mostly I feel the loving care you possess for your mom.  You and your family have taken such good care of your mother and still are.

My heart goes out to you and yours.  I understand what you’re going through.  Keep taking care of yourselves too. 

The first bottle of wine I earmarked for your ma is gone, so I’ve got another waiting for your next eloquent words. 

Thank you for sharing and the love you’ve shown all of us.

LicketyGlitz

Thanks each and everyone of you for your support and best thoughts headed our way. I have shared your kindness with The Other Girl and the rest of the riffraff around. We are grateful to you.

Abuela - what is it with our mom's thinking the boys know best? Old flirts still, I think.

Yeah, Mommie, we've been through several bottles that were earmarked for a toast to Mom. Uh... I getcha'.