Happy Moments

LadyTexan

The dementia journey is full of heartbreak. Yesterday I had happy moments sprinkled into the day that I wanted to share.

The usual routine in our house is I prepare and serve breakfast for DH, I administer meds, I get DH in the shower, I dress DH and then DH retreats into his man cave to watch the news ALL DAY except when he comes out for meals.

I often ask him to engage in other activities such as walks, games, or chilling in the yard. He regularly declines. Of course, when DH declines, it feels like rejection. I know it’s not. I know there is no malice. Lately I am super sensitive because I am extremely lonely and tired.

Yesterday when I asked DH to watch a movie with me, HE SAID YES. We watched the whole movie together. We ate snacks. He smiled and was enjoying himself. To most people I am sure it was an activity and experience taken for granted. For me it was akin to being queen for the day. I was thrilled and still am.

Later that night, DH was talking in his sleep and started giggling. He was smiling in his sleep and looked so happy. Seeing that was the happiest moment in a long, long time.

Happy moments are less frequent, but so dear. I had to share. 

Lorita

Thank you for posting your happy moments, Lady Texan.  It brought tears to my eyes because I was remembering the happy times I had with Charles.  Little things mean so much to us when they happen.  I do hope you have many more of those.

Ed1937

Lady, I'm glad you enjoyed your time with him. The little things we used to take for granted are now real moments of joy. Embrace them.

Mint

Made my heart smile for you.  Thank you for sharing.

amicrazytoo

LT - Thanks so much for sharing. I find myself being bitter recently and trying really hard to get through the day with "glad" hands. Stories like these makes me feel so good.

M1

I know the feeling LT.  Glad you had it, for whatever time it was there.  You are so good about looking for the positive.....

caberr

Thanks for sharing a happy story!

David J

It’s really easy to share our pain and frustration here, but we should be sharing our happy moments more like you. Thank you!

LadyTexan

Hi David.

Full disclosure: its not all rainbows and lollipops over here. I left out the daily routine that includes cleaning up poop and washing soiled laundry.  

I have learned that when I embrace the good things and happy moments, and celebrate those moments no matter how small, that I can bear the less glamorous (and more heartbreaking) events that fill the day.

I may have mentioned before that I have suffered from severe, recurrent depression since my thirties. I am now 56. Years and years of intense therapy have taught me to feed the good so that the bad and scary and sad feelings don't overwhelm me. It doesn't always work....but it helps. 

I am glad this is a safe place where we can all share the pain and frustration. This disease is relentless. If I couldn't unload and vent here, I would be no good to DH or myself. Its nice when I can share a happy tale too.

Best wishes to all for patience and strength to make it through another day.

You are all caregiver SUPER HEROES!