Mean people in Mom's house

GrannyB!

Kinda new here, not so sure about this. But here goes. Mom was diagnosed with dementia in 2018 shortly after my Dad passed. I have been her sole caretaker. Boy what a learning curve this journey has been so far! Recently my Mom has started becoming quite emotional, crying jags that rips your heart out.  For instance, today while fixing lunch I noticed she was quiet. I assumed she was tired from our trip to Walmart.  When I brought her the plate she burst into tears. I sat down, paused the TV and asked her what happened. She tearfully told me a few girls working on a project going on out here had said mean hurtful things. She finished her lunch, but the crying continues. I told her we would simply fire these girls and they wouldn't be allowed on the property. (Entering her reality, is very tough for me, but I'm trying). She calmed so we turned General Hospital back on. She napped through it. I thought she might wake up to different reality. Wrong she was even more upset. We took a couple laps up and down the hallway, she was so depressed she wouldn't even hold her head up! So I came here to vent and possibly get suggestions. Now that I'm about to post this. She's starting to snap out of it! Boy I'm glad. If this happens again how suggestions on how to distract her? She is on 2 types of memory pills, anxiety meds and a sleep meds. I figure this going to be her new normal. But hoping not! Suggestions?

M1

Hi Granny B, sounds like she is hallucinating.  She needs to be evaluated; an interim problem like a UTI could do this, but if that is ruled out, her meds need to be looked at.  She may need a change of med or a change of dose, either one, depending on what she is on.  Many times this is when the atypical antipsychotics are needed (such as Seroquel or Risperdal) to control delusions, which (as your mother indicates) are rarely pleasant and can be frightening to the person having them.

Good luck--I'd call ASAP to get her evaluated.

GrannyB!

Thanks M1. I took her last Wednesday to see her doctor. No UTI. She did increase Mom's Seroquil. Which is now leaving her groggy in the morning, causing even more upset! I've gone so far as purchasing her an sos button and keeping the speaker close by. That way she can alert me, when the mean people return! I am so thankful that we live out in the country. Because if people heard what was going on in this house. They would put me in a hospital for evaluation!!

zauberflote

Hi GrannyB!-- I wonder if anyone remotely like these mean girls and their situation ever show up on General Hospital? Or other soaps/shows your mother may have liked, perhaps. This has caused problems with others on here. Look into older shows with calm and totally G-rated plots. Andy Griffith springs to mind. Movies from the 40's, 50's, older rom coms, stuff with no sturm und drang, which is all soap operas are as I see it. 

You have done very well getting into her reality! This is awful to say, but it gets easier. 

star26

I had the same thought as zauberflote. My Dad got TV mixed up with reality. He sometimes thought he was experiencing what he was seeing on TV and sometimes he even thought who he was seeing on TV was me. If we were having a discussion on another topic, what he was seeing on TV would get intertwined with it. At Stage 5, this happened mostly during times of increased confusion: such as sundowning, when he had an infection, or was otherwise fatigued or stressed.

GrannyB!

I agree with you both, Zauberflote and Star26. We have been living with the Cartwrights (Bonanza), The Virginian, Gunsmoke and Big Valley for several years now! She won't watch anything else! Except for the Young and the Restless and General Hospital. When I try to "introduce" other shows her agitation is tough at best. During the pandemic shutdown, when her soaps were older ones, all she wanted to do was "go home"! She's lived in this house since 74 when it was built!