Update on my dad(3)

RobOT

I'm finally able to write a little, this has been so hard. For anybody else in a similar position, I hope reading this post might be a little comfort about the paths we follow while trying to do the right thing for our loves ones. In the first week of March Dad started falling a lot.  He had fallen very little before that.  He went to the ER after the fifth fall in one week, and was diagnosed with a level three heart block, (severe lack of signals to the heart to beat) and put on hospice.  After one week at home he started having seizures with violent flailing of his arms and legs, cut himself on whatever was close, and then would sleep for hours after.  After that he was either so agitated I would have to hold him down in bed or he would sleep with that raucous, agonal breathing for hours.  Three weeks after that first fall he couldn't cooperate with a diaper change.  I put him in a board and care where he used to know the caregivers (my mother was there till she died)  and watched him recover a little.  The first two nights he was able to get up he tried to escape all night, pounding on the doors and windows and yelling for me.  They medicated him, and now he doesn't even ask me to take him home--so sad, but better than screaming all night.  I felt so bad after seeing him calm, thought maybe I'd made a huge mistake putting him there.  I conveniently forgot about his demanding to go to work all night  when he was home in favor of beating myself up over placing him. Then, today, despite two kinds of anti-seizure meds, I saw him have another seizure.  Now my mind is at peace with his placement.  I never made any promises about keeping him home, but that was my plan if possible.  These decisions are so hard, but I opted to keep both Dad and myself safe.  Not perfect, but better all around, I hope.  Thanks for reading.

RanchersWife

Hugs Robot.

M1

Oh RobOT, what a tough time, I'm so sorry. You are doing the right thing for both of you and I am glad you have the help. Hope you can get some rest and that his days are as peaceful as they can be....thanks for taking the time to tell us the update.

RobOT

Thanks, Rancher'sWife and M1.  I feel so helpless to comfort him.

harshedbuzz

RobOT-

I am sorry for this turn of events. Kudos to you for keeping him home as long as you have and for making the hard choice when that was no longer safe there.

HB