VENT: some days DH is so particular

LadyTexan

I prepare all of DH's meals. I have learned not to get exotic. I keep it simple. I am limited by my remedial cooking skills. When I come across something he likes, I include it in the rotation. When I make something he does not prefer, I remove it from the rotation. Sometimes he makes requests such as more vegetables or salad or oatmeal or eggs. I add those things into the rotation.

Today I made him a beautiful salad for lunch. I called him in when it was ready. Once he saw the salad, he huffed and exclaimed his displeasure with a salad. I offered to augment it with a sandwich. NO he said. I offered to augment it with soup. NO he said. I offered to make him something else. NO he said. He ate a little bit of the salad. Then DH retreated to his man cave with an attitude and a pout to watch TV which is what he does all day.

Some days it seems there is no pleasing this man.

I'll take salad out of the rotation. I suspect that in a week or two he will tell me that he wants to eat more salad. That's been my experience so far. Same thing happened with vegetables, with oatmeal and with eggs.

Argh!

Ed1937

I hear your hurt. I've been going through the same type of thing. Things she always loved are now on the sh-- list. But I've been fortunate about breakfast. For about 3 months now, the only thing she wants for breakfast is 2 BLTs. She used to love oatmeal or bacon and eggs. No more. Could be worse.

LadyTexan

Ed1937 wrote:

 Could be worse.

--LT wrote: You are so right my friend. As frustrating as it is, it could always be worse. 

• I am grateful that DH is still verbal and can communicate his preferences (even though I do not appreciate the attitude and pout). 
• I am grateful that DH is ambulatory and can sit at a table to eat and can swallow.
• I am grateful that DH is still content to watch TV.
• I am grateful that the love of my life is still in my life.
• I am grateful that the frustration of the moment has passed.

ps. DH asked for soup a little latter. DH had his soup and is now much less fussy. Bonus: I can have a big salad tomorrow.

David J

Back in the 1960’s my Nan was in a NH because there was no such thing as MCF. My dad asked her “Did you have a good breakfast?”  Her response was “NO!”  “Oh, what did you have?”  Response was just an embarrassed smile. My mom was in tears. 

I remember that when DW doesn’t like something I cook. As long as I can get her to eat and adjust the menu to keep her engaged, everything is good. Even when she had no idea what she ate and whether she liked it. 

janeymack

I buy a LOT of various breakfast cereals. DH loves milk and will happily eat a bowl of cereal if he doesn't like what I serve for lunch or dinner. Breakfast cereals can have a lot of sugars, but they are almost all loaded with vitamins and minerals, and many with a decent amount of fiber. Plenty of calories, too, for those not eating enough. They kept this latch-key kid alive for many years!

Pam BH

Even before his diagnosis my DH was a picky eater and if I fixed something that wasn't his idea he wasn't happy.  So I made a dinner menu for him to pick from each morning what he would like to have for dinner.  I made sure to stock up on everything I'd need for all the selections.  Worked beautifully.  I've now noticed he has a hard time choosing, so I'll suggest something from the menu and he'll usually agree.  Makes meal planning much easier.  He's always been a big breakfast person but lately hasn't known what to say he wants, so I added a breakfast menu and also a dessert menu.  He's always just eaten a big breakfast and dinner and no lunch, so just two meals to worry about.  One funny thing is that in the 47 years I've known him he's hated salads.  Now he wants one every day before dinner. and doesn't understand why I think it's strange.  Come to find out his first wife always fixed salads.  Guess I ought to thank her because I love salads!

amicrazytoo

Just this weekend my DH asked to try sausage for breakfast, it's been well over two years and all he ever wanted was scrapple and eggs.  Yesterday I cooked Bob Evans sausage, he was not happy with that. Today I tried Jimmy Dean, again not happy. I told him tomorrow we will be back to scrapple, that made him happy. I guess, I will have to eat the sausage or throw it out. I'm more of a bacon person. Perhaps I will try mixing the sausage with ground chicken for a juicier chicken burger.

LadyTexan

Amicrazy - 

I am right there with ya! What is scrapple?

EDIT to include wikipedia's definition of scrapple:

Scrapple, also known by the Pennsylvania Dutch name Pannhaas or "pan rabbit", is traditionally a mush of pork scraps and trimmings combined with cornmeal and wheat flour, often buckwheat flour, and spices. The mush is formed into a semi-solid congealed loaf, and slices of the scrapple are then pan-fried before serving.

John_inFlorida

scrapple is everything from a pig except the oink

we had it in Pennsylvania

I like it buy my DW wouldn't even try it

amicrazytoo

JohninFlorida described it perfectly, it does seem to be a regional food.  Some things it's better not to know what goes into it... We are in the Mid-Atlantic area, Maryland. I have friends from New England that had never heard of it either. If you ever get the chance to try it, go for it. I find it delish!

White Crane

Lady Texan, oh, my do I understand!  One thing I've learned though is to just go ahead and fix the sandwich or whatever even if he says no.  Most of the time he says no to anything that isn't already on the table.  And if I leave him alone for a few minutes and put it in front of him, he will usually eat it.  He like pickled herring.  It comes in a jar and I have always bought the same brand.  Last week, I bought a different brand...a more expensive brand.  He got very upset!  "This isn't what I'm used to!"  After apologizing several times, I put it back in the fridge.  Last night I put it on the table again without saying anything about it.  He loved it! 

And Lady Texan, thank you for including your gratitude list.  Reading it always helps me.