I made her get the wrong hair cut

wizmo

Some 5 months ago DW wanted to change her hair style to something that would be easier to manage by herself - shorter, less maintenance.  Almost immediately she hated it, though it did serve its purpose early on.  She wanted it put back, but understood this could not happen quickly.  So she let it grow out a bit.  Yesterday we went back to the stylist who has known her forever, and is also discreetly aware her memory is failing.  We discussed briefly she wants to return to what it was "before".  Not perfect in one cut, but pretty close, I thought we left happy.

Later in the evening DW asked why she got this other "new" style, it's not what she wanted - and of course it's my fault for being involved in the conversation at all.  "Boys should butt out."  She really wanted something I can only guess is from an earlier time in her life, unfortunately before I even knew her.  I didn't offer to show her photos from the last 10+ years to prove she actually did go back to the previous (5 months ago) look.

I'm not sure anything will satisfy her at this point and can only promise we'll try again on the next visit.  Or maybe she will just forget that it was ever a problem and accept what is in the mirror matches what is on pictures all around the house.  Big sigh.

Ed1937

Wizmo, welcome to the forum. Sorry you are dealing with this disease too. Could you show her pictures of herself with different hair styles, then take a picture of the one she chooses? You can take that to the hairdresser next time to show her exactly what she would like. Just a thought.

amicrazytoo

Speaking as a woman, I am generally am not happy with my hair cuts until a few weeks in, after I have had time to make it my own.  It always looks nice when I leave the salon, but once I have washed it, it will never look the same as it did fresh from the salon. I think you did fine.

Rescue mom

I kind of agree with amicrazytoo. I feel your pain, had similar events with my DH with Alzheimer’s. But that reaction to a haircut is such a “girl thing” (I still say that even being on Medicare), exacerbated by Alzheimer’s. Hopefully, best case, in a few days she will get used to it and/or forget going or what she wanted. Meanwhile, keep your head down...