Celebrating mother's day

Crushed

I took lunch to DW and her caretakers had gone all out to dress her up for mothers day .  She was wearing her flowered dress from Hawaii, earrings and a neck pendant. DW ate the  chocolate cake I brought  and we got some photos.  but there was not the slightest flicker of recognition.   I filmed her walking for our daughters.  Since she had a dress on you could see her steady gait.   She looked great.   If only DW was really there.   Came home and cried.   She has been this way for almost 3 years.   Her birthday is next week.  She will be 69. 

LadyTexan

(((Crushed)))

Mint

(((Crushed))) I’m so sorry

chrisp1653

Crushed, you are tops in my book. To go over and beyond when it seems like all wasted effort. I must confess that Barbara was never completely gone, so far as I could tell, but she certainly wasn't here either. The things that hurt me the most were also the things that kept me going.

There was the time when, after I was losing it and getting angry with her because her Parkinson's would make that right leg of hers come shooting out like it had a spring attached to it, and she said  ( in her very soft voice ) , " I don't want it to do that . " Or the time - 2 weeks to the day before she passed - when both of her eyes were open, and she seemed alert, when I was able to get what is now my profile pic here. Finally, in her last week, when she was mostly comatose, she had made some kind of noise, and I asked her if she was all right. I really didn't expect any answer, but from somewhere in her depths came the whisper, " Not very good. "

Those were the last words I ever heard her speak. A few days later, and she was gone.

I remember those words, and they comfort me somewhat, because I feel like, even at the end, she was in there, trying to get out. Was she ?

I don't really know, but I hope to find out one day.