Fun afternoon

David J

I tried to give us a fun afternoon yesterday, without much success. Both of us have enjoyed interesting and fun automobiles our whole lives. We’ve been on various clubs and enjoyed outings and shows with our collector vehicles. Yesterday was a group drive of Triumphs and MGs sponsored by our Triumph group. We both were enthusiastic about this all week leading up to yesterday. 

I should have known it wasn’t going to go well when I couldn’t get her out of bed. Then she didn’t remember we had planned this, and couldn’t seem to understand when I told her again. She refused to allow me to tie her back, refused a hat and wouldn’t put on sunscreen. She pouted as I buckled her into the car. She didn’t do too badly on the drive to the starting point, but once Ther refused to get out of the car, just sat there in the sun. I circulated, meeting and seeing people and their cars. By the time the group was ready for the drive (to a State Park with a beach) she wanted to go home. Since the intended route took us within a mile of home, we got in line and we all drove together. This always a fun activity and quite a sight to see more than a dozen old British sports cars driving all together. We get waves, thumbs up, and friendly horn toots all the way. Halfway to the park at our decision point, DW was insistent that she wanted to go home. So I turned off at the road to our house and went home. What should have been a fun afternoon for both of us was ruined by AD. 

When we bought this car three years ago, DW participated in the decision and agreed that it would be a fun thing for both of us to do together. Last summer she seemed to enjoy it, but now I’m not sure this will be much of a couples activity for us. Another happy thing taken by this awful disease. 

Sorry this got long but it’s just me ranting. 

Bhopper

I can hear my thoughts in you post. Not sure what I am trying to say other than all we can do is try to have the occasional good days and sometime all we get is a good moment out of the day. But sometimes its enough to get to the next good one.

Rescue mom

I hear you too well. We used to sail. Our last boat was a 32-footer, comfy for us overnight. DH was good enough to race other peoples’ boats all over the Caribbean and US coasts and I’d help crew. (ours wasn’t for racing). I sold our boat 3? years ago. DH lost interest and ability long before. I don’t even like to think about it anymore, too painful. 

But a few weeks ago, out of the blue, he said “remember that race when we beat Dennis Connor”  It was true, we crewed and won a San Diego race that Connor sailed in,  a few months after Connor won the America’s Cup. I was beyond flabbergasted DH remembered. (He doesn’t remember grandkids, holidays, other trips etc). Having him remember that took my breath away. Maybe you’ll have a moment like that later.

M1

David, it's so sad when it's just easier to not have any expectations, isn't it?  I'm sorry it didn't work out the way you had hoped.  I try to remind myself to just keep my head low, but it's hard to do that all the time.  Is she still safe to be left alone?  Maybe next time you just go by yourself.  That hurts, too.

Ed1937

No doubt these things are hard to accept. I'd be a happy camper if my wife could just go for a walk with me on the paved trail next to our house. But those days are gone too.

Jeff86

How the losses do mount up.

I am sorry that this well conceived plan didn’t produce the desired result—a delightful afternoon for your DW and for you.  With AD, things change, unexpectedly and regrettably.

Still....you get a gold star for your efforts.