Corona Virus thread shut down/DH passed on May 19, 2021

lsh42

First of all I would like to thank all the knowledge I gained from this site. Everyone's comments on my posts were very helpful.

I posted about my husband's decline after receiving his first Moderna shot. I asked that everyone be mindful of how they responded to my post. I had not checked that post for awhile  because I was to consumed with taking care of my husband. When I did check on it the comments had been turned off. This really upset me. I was looking for support and specifically asked for everyone to think about their comments before posting. One person required proof of my statement and then sh.t hit the fan. I was looking for support and to let everyone that he had a bad reaction to the shot. Yes, he was declining before the shot. I was telling my experience. Awhile back I left this sight because I could not read certain reply's to LO post, nor could I handle the fear mongering that went on when Covid 19 was discovered. I was an essential worker during the beginning of the virus. That meant I had to leave my house and go to work and have caregivers come into my home. None of us contracted Covid 19 to this day. This will be my last post to this sight. I will respond to people's comments on this thread, but I can no longer be an active participant. 

On May 6th my husband Jack went on hospice because he could no longer walk more than a few feet. He was unable to swallow liquids or soft foods within a couple of days. I was told by hospice on May 10th that he would probably not make it thru the night. I had Last Rights preformed that night. During his hospice I developed excruciating pain in my hip, thigh, knee and shin. There were days that I could only get out of bed to check on him. He lingered on for 13 days. He finally took his last breath at 3:53am May 19th. He never spoke nor did he ever open his eyes. It was a long and painful time. I have not really cried or mourned his death yet. The only thing I can think is because I am in so much pain my brain is not registering what has happened. 

He will have a full military honor graveside service On May 28th. He was a Vietnam Veteran and serviced his country proudly.

I wish you all well.

Lisa

M1

Lisa I am so sorry for your loss, and for your physical as well as spiritual pain. I know from your posts that these last few months have been very rough. I hope that time will bring you healing.

Joe C.

Lisa, My condolences on the loss of your husband, may you find some peace in the days ahead.

Jeff86

Deepest sympathies, Lisa, on your DH’s passing.  I hope you have some relief soon for the pain you are experiencing.  You have been a great caregiver; time, now, to care for yourself.

June45

I am so sorry for the loss of your husband. You probably haven't cried or mourned his death yet because you are still in a state of shock, like you say, so much pain from the events of the past few weeks. You had to deal with so much thrown at you all at once. It will hit you when you least expect it.  Prayers are with you and your family.

LadyTexan

Dear Lisa.

I am so sorry. You have been a courageous and compassionate caregiver. This all seems so unfair.

May God comfort you. May He bring you peace. May He heal your physical pain.

Please take care of you. 

-LT

jfkoc

Ish, please add my sympathy. Your loss is great. Your life changed. Whenever you are ready I hope you might join us on Loritta's porch where we "chat".

Now about your thread being locked down. It was inevitable.....it was caught in a cross fire and when one or more members get snarky and personal it gets reported and the thread is locked. 

Your experience was valid. I hope you did report it to the CDC or the appropriate agency.

Take care of your needs now and what those needs are is up to you. Do not take to heart what anyone says you need to do. It is your grief...your mourning. One size does not fit all.

Michael Ellenbogen

I am sorry for your loss.

piozam13

I feel your pain.  I too lost DH last January and the pain hasn't gone away.  I  feel comfort  that DH is in a better place.  I hope you feel the same way. 

I'm looking for a support group like what we have now. This has been a tremendous resource for me.  

Again my condolences.  Maybe we can exchange notes re grieving. 

Iris L.

Lisa, please accept my condolences in the loss of your dear husband.  

Iris L.

Lorita

Lisa, please accept my sincere condolences on the loss of your husband.  I know the pain and grief you're feeling.  I hope you can feel better soon.  We would love to have you join us on our porch anytime you feel like chatting with ius.

abc123

Lisa, please accept my sincere condolences on the loss of your precious husband. You will be in my thoughts and prayers.

Lills

Lisa,  I'm so very sorry for your loss!  Please know that we're all thinking of you!  

Marie58

Lisa, I'm so sorry for your loss and for how hard it has been for you. Please take care of yourself so that you can heal physically. May God grant you peace, strength and comfort in the days, weeks and months ahead.

abc123

Lisa, I just wanted to tell you I went back and read the post you made about what you and DH experienced from the injections. You have nothing to apologize for, nothing at all. I'm very sorry you were made to feel badly because your post was locked. Please remember you are loved and cared about deeply. I hope that you will check in from time to time to let us know how you are getting along. You have been through so much, I wish you peace and comfort. 

Sincerely,

abc

CStrope

This is all such a difficult thing to deal with, and you've just experienced the most difficult part of it all.....something we all know we have ahead of us.  

I wish you comfort, I wish you peace, and most of all I hope you find a way to take that wonderful strength that carried you through your DH's illness and allow yourself to not only grieve, but survive.

I am so so so very sorry for your loss

Lane Simonian

I am saddened by the loss of your husband, Lisa.  Thank you for the help and insights that you have provided on Alzconnected over the years.  I wish you some peace in the days to come.

White Crane

Lisa, I’m so sorry. Praying you find peace in the coming days and healing also.

ButterflyWings

Dear ish - Lisa,

Sending you heartfelt wishes that you will be able to find comfort and peace in time, after such a struggle with this disease and now the sudden loss of your dear husband. I am so very sorry for your loss.

Last Dance

Lisa I am sorry for the loss of your husband and the pain you are feeling physically, and mentally. You did a great job taking care of your husband, I pray that you now can take care of yourself.   God's Blessings to you Richard

lsh42

Thank you all for your condolences and your love. 

His funeral is tomorrow.  Hopefully I will have a release of emotions then.

It was a 12 year journey and feels very strange that he is not here. It is strange leaving my house without me making sure someone else is here.

I found out I have a herniated disc at L4-L5 and S1. I'm sure it is from picking him up off the floor. Now I need to see a different doc for pain management or surgery. 

I would like to look at the "porch" thread but I am unsure where to find it.

Thank you all for all your support. 

Lisa

Jo C.

Dearest Lisa, I just saw your writing; I am deeply sorry for the painful loss of your beloved husband.  It was a very long journey through all that happened and you stayed the course in the best way possible with very difficult circumstances. 

I am also sorry to hear of your back problem issues; I so hope that can be tended to soon and that treatment for relief will be easily done.

You mentioned going to the "Front Porch" at Lorita's place where many of us drop in to just to chat.  When you are settled and ready, the welcome mat is always out to join in if you wish.  Our fictitious Front Porch always has lovely weather no matter the season, and all the rocking chairs on the porch fit every size backside.   It is a relaxing place where we all just chat about what is going on in our every day lives; most all of us there have had LOs who have had dementia and passed away, and some still have LOs who are with them.  Just a good group of friends sharing with one another.  Lorita does us all a good service; it is a relaxing place to be.

It is the every day sharing of gardens, food, grooming, pets, thoughts, worries, our own health, events, and so much more.  Lorita at age 79 is single handedly managing and working a many acred ranch with cattle.  She is in the midst of a newborn calf nursery which has been pretty busy and we all learn about so much froom her as most of us are city/town dwellers.

It is an active front porch, so Lorita has to start a new ongoing Thread every so often, about once a month. She is now on Thread 147!

Here is the link to the present Front Porch Group, "Just Want To Talk To My Friends":

https://www.alzconnected.org/discussion.aspx?g=posts&t=2147556822

That is something you can choose if you wish whenever you feel up to it, in the meantime Lisa, I will be thinking of you; especially tomorrow when service is to be held.  Let us know how you are and how things are going; we truly care.

With warmest of thoughts being sent your way,

J.

jfkoc

We will be with you tomorrow.....

ladyzetta

Dear Lisa,

I am also one of the front porch friends and we will be with you tomorrow. Please take care of yourself.  Hugs Zetta 

Ed1937

Ish, I'm so sorry to hear of your loss. And also to hear of your physically painful experiences, and the locking of that thread. You do need to grieve, but I hope it is short. It is time to take care of yourself now.

Jo C.

Dear Ish, just dropping in again to let you know you are being thought of.

J.

Potsie

Dear Lisa,

So sorry to hear of the loss of your Dear Husband. May he rest in peace. I pray for you to be Blessed with the strength to deal with the loss and the pain, both heart felt pain and physical pain. Hoping for blessings in your future.