Have any questions about how to use the community? Check out the Help Discussion.

How important is it to have a current Government issued ID?

I posted this in the other driver's license topic but it did get me thinking about this problem again.

Put in context, mom is in MC. She will never drive again. I'm her DPOA and HCP. She has very little understanding of anything.

My mom's driver's license expired October 2020. A good month before it expired I mailed it into the RMV requesting a simple state photo ID. It was over a month before anyone even opened the letter and by then the license had expired and I got a letter back saying that because it was expired I would need to take my mom to an RMV in person!

Was I likely to take my wheelchair dependent, confused, 85 year old, unvaccinated mom to the RMV In the middle of a pandemic? Ah.. no.

Of course she and I are now vaccinated.

I have her birth certificate and her marriage certificate, other documents, an expired passport and a photo of the expired driver's license. Getting her to the RMV would be a huge ordeal and she probably could only answer the questions "What is your name and birthday". She has no idea her address or even the town she lives in.

How likely is it that she will need an current ID?

Comments

  • Iris L.
    Iris L. Member Posts: 4,373
    Legacy Membership 2500 Comments 500 Likes 250 Care Reactions
    Member

    Good question.  Why does she need ID if you are her POA and handling her affairs?  If she has a photo ID, even if expired, IMO, that should be enough.  But that is just my opinion, not a legal answer.  

    Iris

  • star26
    star26 Member Posts: 189
    Fifth Anniversary 100 Comments
    Member
    My Dad needed a valid, current ID at least a couple times even though I had all the POAs and did all the talking. I can't remember what for, but it's one of those things that you don't anticipate until the moment that someone says she needs one, no exceptions, and it's a big pain in the butt if you don't have it. I think I called the office to see if he really had to go in to get the ID and he did (which doesn't seem right for elderly and homebound people). He also had mobility problems and I had to handle the whole thing for him. The rep also added a statement on his ID with my name and phone number.
  • [Deleted User]
    [Deleted User] Posts: 0
    Sixth Anniversary 1000 Comments 250 Likes 100 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member
    The user and all related content has been deleted.
  • John2.0.1
    John2.0.1 Member Posts: 122
    100 Comments First Anniversary
    Member

    My mom is physically incapable of signing her name. Not only is it just scattered marks, if you point to the line and say sign here, she'll start making pen marks 6 inches away, frequently not even on the paper. I have wood table to prove it the last time I asked her to sign anything.

    That was before my most current DPOA was finalized.

  • Quilting brings calm
    Quilting brings calm Member Posts: 2,448
    500 Likes 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 250 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I’ve had to produce one for medical care. Another poster here is having trouble with her Dads benefits etc without one. 

    I took my LO in to change her out of  state DL to an ID. The staff did their best to make it quick and painless.  They got her chairs to sit in even though most of the chairs had been out away due to social distancing, 

  • BassetHoundAnn
    BassetHoundAnn Member Posts: 478
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Care Reactions 25 Likes
    Member
    Whenever I take my mom for a doctor visit or to an urgent care clinic they've asked to see a photo I.D. to verify her identity. I assume they want to make sure she's not using someone else's health insurance. I've taken to carrying her driver's license with me for that reason.
  • John2.0.1
    John2.0.1 Member Posts: 122
    100 Comments First Anniversary
    Member

    Mom's ER visits never needed an ID. Perhaps that is because she was sent directly by the MC with her paperwork. Her PCP didn't require an ID. But now that you mention it when I took her to urgent care they wanted ID. I recall they accepted the digital photo of her expired drivers license which I emailed from my phone. 

    I suppose I need to keeps this on my to do list. Though it does feel cruel to have to drag my mom to a place that she doesn't understand and just confuse her.

  • BassetHoundAnn
    BassetHoundAnn Member Posts: 478
    Fourth Anniversary 100 Comments 25 Care Reactions 25 Likes
    Member
    John2.0.1 wrote:

    Mom's ER visits never needed an ID. Perhaps that is because she was sent directly by the MC with her paperwork. Her PCP didn't require an ID. But now that you mention it when I took her to urgent care they wanted ID. I recall they accepted the digital photo of her expired drivers license which I emailed from my phone. 

    I suppose I need to keeps this on my to do list. Though it does feel cruel to have to drag my mom to a place that she doesn't understand and just confuse her.

    A phone photo of her expired license might be totally sufficient. So could that expired passport. You might call a few medical clinics in your area and ask if they require a non-expired ID to see patients. Whenever I've had a medical procedure like surgery, tests, etc. I've had to provide my license as ID. I've had to provide my mom's license when I took her to a new dentist for the first time and also when I called the EMTs. Since they probably just wanted to check the picture for identification an expired license might be perfectly o.k. in these situations. 
  • GothicGremlin
    GothicGremlin Member Posts: 853
    Fifth Anniversary 250 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Likes
    Member

    My sister has a valid state ID (not a Real ID - no need for that).  Even though I have her POA for medical and financial, I've had to show her ID on occasion for doctor visits.

    I'm getting ready to close out a quasi-dormant bank account of hers and I know I'm going to need her valid state ID for that (because they told me I would).

    When her state ID expires, unless I can renew it via mail, I'll use her passport if I need a government issued ID.  I renewed her passport two years ago, so she's got 8 more years for that.

    So, I guess what I'm saying is that if you can do it easily and without having to move her here and there, it might be a good idea to make sure she has some kind of valid government issued ID. Just in case something unforeseen pops up.

  • eaglemom
    eaglemom Member Posts: 544
    Legacy Membership 500 Comments 100 Likes 25 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    I'm just thinking out loud here. Her expired pass port - how out of date is it? You can renew on line if its less than 5 years out of date. That 'should' count for a current ID.

    eagle

  • Cynbar
    Cynbar Member Posts: 539
    500 Comments Third Anniversary 5 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member
    How about renewing her passport? That's my plan for my DH who also has an expired license and would have great difficulty getting to the DMV. His passport is still valid but I'll work on renewing it when it expires, I can get him into CVS for the picture requirement.
  • WhatNow?
    WhatNow? Member Posts: 21
    Third Anniversary 10 Comments
    Member

    I think my mom will need one if we need to apply for medicaid at some point. 

    Also, we have had to supply her id for things like Dr appointments and when we placed her in assisted living/memory care.

    If we have to go to the DMV it will be a pain because one she will be angry if she finds out we aren't getting a driver's license, even though she hasn't driven in almost 2 years and we have changed her address, so that will just be a pain. 

  • Quilting brings calm
    Quilting brings calm Member Posts: 2,448
    500 Likes 1000 Comments Fourth Anniversary 250 Insightfuls Reactions
    Member

    ==When her state ID expires, unless I can renew it via mail, I'll use her passport if I need a government issued ID.  I renewed her passport two years ago, so she's got 8 more years for that.==


    Each state is different of course. Since my Mom was over 65, her state ID  is permanent. So I never have to worry about that again.

  • John2.0.1
    John2.0.1 Member Posts: 122
    100 Comments First Anniversary
    Member

    Trying to renew her passport isn't a bad idea. But it expired in 2013. If possible that might be better. I would have to take her to the public library for that. But the library is a lot less stressful than the RMV.  Of course if I renew her passport she'll be asking me where we are going for the next 2 years.

    I also need to look into AAA. The RMV outsources a lot of stuff to AAA but not sure if this is one of them. The two websites are not clear on this.

  • terei
    terei Member Posts: 573
    Seventh Anniversary 500 Comments 100 Insightfuls Reactions 100 Likes
    Member
    After I moved my mother from AZ to MN.  She had a valid AZ drivers license.  I took her to DMV to get a MN ID (not DL) FOUR TRIPS to DMV before they finally issued one...kept asking for more documents, including marriage licenses from two marriages, death cert from first husband and her CERTIFIED birth certificate.
    It was over the top to say the least.  This was when she was still in AL.   After we finally did get the ID, she never once used it during the last 2-3 years of her life. Total waste of time for us.
  • GothicGremlin
    GothicGremlin Member Posts: 853
    Fifth Anniversary 250 Care Reactions 500 Comments 100 Likes
    Member

    Quilting brings calm --  I had no idea some states have permanent IDs. That's great!

    Eaglemom - that's right about the passports. I forgot that when I renewed my sister's, it was expired, but less than 5 years expired.  I filled out the form, paid the fee, and got the new passport with no problem. We had to get a new photo for her and that was a bit of a pain, but all things considered, not that big of a deal.

  • Stuck in the middle
    Stuck in the middle Member Posts: 1,167
    1000 Comments Fifth Anniversary 5 Care Reactions 5 Likes
    Member

    It gets worse every year.  When I started tutoring children in reading, I had to pass checks on the sex offender registry, police records, some kind of "fired from nursing home" registry, and about four others.  This year, the State passed a law that they have to check my fingerprints too.  A person without ID becomes more and more of a "non-person" to use the old Soviet term.

    I don't know if any of you will ever need an ID for your LO.  I am sure that it will become harder to obtain the longer you wait to get it.  It is much easier to keep an ID current than to obtain another after an old one has expired.

    I walked into a Social Security office in 1962 with nothing in my pockets but a library card (maybe) and walked out with a Social Security card.  Last time I went to the SS office, I needed a photo ID just to walk through a metal detector under the gaze of two armed guards, before I got to see anyone else.

    My mother let her driver's license expire when she stopped driving.  Then the bank she had used for decades refused to give her her money because her ID was expired.  Fortunately, she had previously added my name as a signer (not owner) of the account and I was able to deal with it without getting her another ID.  That's when she began calling herself a "non-person."  She was just old, then, not demented.  That came later.

    My 45 year old disabled son wanted to buy a pack of cigarettes a couple of years ago, and was refused because he didn't have an ID to prove he was over 18.  Further, the store refused to sell me a pack because they considered it a "straw purchase."  

    Big Brother is watching you.  Keep your papers in order.

Commonly Used Abbreviations


DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
Read more