met with CELA today

Mikela

Dad and stepmother are not speaking to me.  But a very productive day, otherwise.  I think we (siblings) have more of a direction now after meeting with the CELA.  Two goals: one to get Dad to further testing with a neurologist Baylor's Memory Center and  two, to try one more time to mediate this before pulling the trigger and asking for temporary and then permanent guardianship.  I'm told the temporary one will get us a hearing in 10 days and the permanent guardianship could take about a year with how the courts are right now.  The bank accounts are still frozen, while being reviewed by various legal departments.   My aunt K (my Dad's younger sister) is coming to town next week and I hope that her visit will help us push him back into regular health treatments etc.  One of my biggest concerns now is being able to pay bills.  All the bank accounts are frozen because of stepmother's actions.  She turned a revocation into the different banks revoking a specific DPOA.  The document  revoked a specific, recent DPOA that we'd done in April before we realized the dementia had gone so far and also it referred to a non-existent medical POA.  We'd had him sign a DPOA in April of this year.  This was before we found his extensive DPOA, medical POA, will and advance directives from 1999 hidden in his office files.  The CELA also asked we obtain a Certificate of Medical Exam if possible from the doctor(s) that see him. My other aunt M who lives in town visited Dad recently.  Initially, she was yelled at and rebuffed on the phone.  My Dad thought she was me.  Sigh.  I hate that it has come to this.  Aunt M called me and told me about her visit and that Dad agreed to more testing so I am hopeful as long as he doesn't recant again.  I'm in the process of scheduling that appointment during his remaining sister's visit from out of state so she can assist getting him there too.  It will need to be a family affair, I suspect.  Luckily, both his blood sisters are on board and understand what is happening.  I'm lucky to have such strong support in the women in my family.    I see hope which is something I guess.  So neurologist and a neurophyschologist,  are both required?  See you on the flipside, Mikela

Mikela

Mikela wrote:

Dad and stepmother are not speaking to me.  But a very productive day, otherwise.  I think we (siblings) have more of a direction now after meeting with the CELA.  Two goals: one to get Dad to further testing with a neurologist Baylor's Memory Center and  two, to try one more time to mediate this before pulling the trigger and asking for temporary and then permanent guardianship.  I'm told the temporary one will get us a hearing in 10 days and the permanent guardianship could take about a year with how the courts are right now.  The bank accounts are still frozen, while being reviewed by various legal departments.   My aunt K (my Dad's younger sister) is coming to town next week and I hope that we will help us push him back into regular health treatments etc.  One of my biggest concerns now is being able to pay bills.  All the bank accounts are frozen because of stepmother's actions.  She turned a revocation into the different banks revoking a specific DPOA.  The document  revoked a specific, recent DPOA that we'd done in April before we realized the dementia had gone so far and also it referred to a non-existent medical POA.  We'd had him sign a DPOA in April of this year.  This was before we found his extensive DPOA, medical POA, will and advance directives from 1999 hidden in his office files.  The CELA also asked we obtain a Certificate of Medical Exam if possible from the doctor(s) that see him. My other aunt M who lives in town visited Dad recently.  Initially, she was yelled at and rebuffed on the phone.  My Dad thought she was me.  Sigh.  I hate that it has come to this.  Aunt M called me and told me about her visit and that Dad agreed to more testing so I am hopeful as long as he doesn't recant again.  I'm in the process of scheduling that appointment during his remaining sister's visit from out of state so she can assist getting him there too.  It will need to be a family affair, I suspect.  Luckily, both his blood sisters are on board and understand what is happening.  I'm lucky to have such strong support in the women in my family.    I see hope which is something I guess.  See you on the flipside, Mikela

jfkoc

Yes. Bravo on the progress!

dayn2nite2

It sounds good, but please prepare for the worst-case scenario because stepmother is very invested in the medical neglect and will not be willing to see him being assessed because it threatens "her" version of the POA.  So bills will not be paid in the meantime.  You can try to mitigate that damage via phone or find another source to pay from and then repay it from the frozen funds once they're unfrozen.

I would still prepare to end up going for guardianship, though.

Jerome Likes Pie

To answer your question, in my experience, the neurologist performed a short memory test and an MRI on the brain.  Because of the poor results, he referred my LO to a neuropsychologist for the 3 hour memory test for a diagnosis.  It was a gigantic struggle to get my LO to go to this.  Apparently, a conclusive diagnosis can only be done after death, so the diagnosis is the neuropsychologist's professional opinion and supported by her written report on the LO's cognitive ability.  It isn't required, but it helped me understand what my LO and myself are dealing with so that we could prepare and plan for proper care.

Also, we are starting to find that the cognitive ability report provided by the neuropsychologist to the LO's PCP can be helpful to support some decisions legally that we are making as DPOA for our LO's benefit.  Hope this helps.