Lady Texan, thinking about you

M1

I know the hospital had set today for tentative discharge, am hoping that didn't happen. Hope you are okay.

LadyTexan

Thank you M1. I stood my ground with the hospital. The discharge has been delayed, but the result is uncertain. It seems that there is NO good solution. Some options are less horrible than others. 

This has been an exhausting experience.

ladyzetta

Dear Lady T.

I am glad you stood your ground please don't let exhaustion cause you to change your mind. It sounds like you do have options and I am sure what ever one you choose will be the best for the both of you. You need some rest some much needed rest.  Please take care of yourself. Hugs Zetta  

Mint

Dearest Lady Texan,  Glad you were given the strength to be strong.  There may not be a perfect solution but as long as he is somewhere that protects him from endangering himself or others that is way better solution than him ending up in the legal system.  Sorry this is so hard.  Thinking of you frequently.

Cynbar

Anything that keeps both of you safe IS a good solution. Don't forget that you can always move him to a different facility later, if he clears a long waitlist or his behaviors remain under control. Stay strong, we are pulling for you.

Ed1937

I knew you were a strong lady, and I'm sure you needed every bit of strength you had. I hope things work out better than you expect.

Jo C.

Some really good input from folks.   This is a hard place to find oneself; I have experienced a similar dynamic where there were no good options and having to do the best that could be done under the circumstances, placing where I was not wanting to and where I was not completely comfortable.  A few months later, I was able to find a better fit and make a transfer.

It is sometimes necessary; place where one can, then after that is accomplished you can look further for something that you are more comfortable with and will have time to do so.  Once your husband has had a period of time at a care facility, being not violent or not a severe behavioral problem, it will be easier to find a different setting for him. 

I send best wishes for peace and for things to be as good as they can at this particilar point in time, let us know how you are, we are thinking of you. 

J.

Beachfan

LadyTexan wrote:

 It seems that there is NO good solution. Some options are less horrible than others.

LT, 

There may be no good solution at this time; one that would meet all your immediate needs and desires, but as Jo C. pointed out, no solution is final.  Having DH out of your home, for the time being, wherever that placement may be, will give you time to investigate alternatives.  Hopefully, you will be well rested, calmer, clear headed and able to weigh all your options.  Stay resolute in your decision to have DH remain out of the home; you are not the first poster to have this dilemma.  I, for one, am thinking of you and praying for a good outcome as are others on this board, whether they post or not.  Stay strong!

Marie58

LT, may God continue to give you the strength you need to get through this difficult time of challenges and decision-making. I also pray He gives you peace in the decisions that you make. Keep coming here for strength, too. We're all here for you!