stage 5 symptom becoming prominent
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M1, my DH is similar to your partner with sounds. I'm used to it, now, but early on, I was a bit surprised at what he thought the noise was. I commonly ask if he heard a typically loud noise and he responds that he did, but he never, ever goes to see what it is/was.
Same with no incontinence and dressing. Two nights ago, right before bed, he went to the bedroom and came out having changed out of his PJs into regular clothes. I asked him why and he did not know. The next day I asked again and he said he was cold. He went from long sleeve PJs to a short sleeve golf shirt. Anyway, I just said that if he was ever cold, we can change the thermostat to make the house warmer.
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M1 - I'm sorry for the epiphanies and observations that we attentive caregivers note, because they always (or often) confirm progression (as we know will occur) and that hurts.
My DH is 6c, but has always seemed to straddle a couple of stages during this journey so far. Even though he's pretty far along in AD in many ways, he insists on dressing himself and is surprisingly able to do so, logistically. Legs and arms in the correct garment and in the right hole, even buttoning the dress shirt (and cuffs!) just fine most of the time, which surprises me.
But like Nancy mentioned, most of his trouble is with choosing the right outfit for the season or temperature. He occasionally now will put a t-shirt on inside out and backward, and/or will put a clean depends on top of a slightly wet one. And carefully hangs up the stained shirts & pants he just removed, if willing to change clothes at all which is only once a week, or so.
His main issue with dressing now is insisting on things like wearing a long winter coat outside (did that 4 weeks ago, 80 degrees); long sleeves on top of 2 t-shirts right now, or overdressing even when he's not cold. He just thinks its winter, despite the clear (to others) signs that it is summertime. I keep trying to pack away or quickly hide out of season clothes but it hasn't worked too well so far. Rummaging always turns up what I don't want it to. =|
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Butterflywings, I can relate to the inappropriate clothes wearing.
In the dead of winter, on a very cold day, if we go anywhere, he says he does not need a coat or takes a very light summer jacket. I always grab his winter coat and gloves and say, if we should have a car accident, we need warm coats.
A few weeks ago he went out to do something and wore a heavy winter coat, winter hat and gloves. LOL. It was 80 plus degrees out and he seemed unconcerned when I said he was going to get too warm dressed in winter clothes.
Also, all he always wears are bedroom slippers. I remind him to put on tennis shoes if we go somewhere.
Wearing dirty clothes is common place. A few times we have gone to a doctor appointment and there he sits in dirty clothes. I try to remember to see what he has on before we leave. If (he) is running slow, we just go with what he has on.
His recent (last few months thing) is to constantly talk to himself. Over and over he says, "ok. ok, ok" He will also repeat what he is going to do, over and over.
Watching movies or tv shows he constantly repeats the last few lines they say.
I am learning to tune him out, plus in the evenings, he sometimes falls asleep for a bit.
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My partner is stage 6. 6a and 6b already advanced and 6c beginning (doesn’t flush toilets or before peeing, sometimes let used toilets paper on the top of toilets, doesn’t wipe ).
I never noticed he wasn’t interpreting background noise. The only thing is when I have a zoom meeting he thinks there are people in the house .
What was obvious was :
-Addiction to sweets over other foods (now finished)
-Beginning of apraxia (unable to put his belt on)
-Cannot give accurate information
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French, mine can still put on his belt and eats very little, so no addictions, yet.
I'm not surprised yours thinks people are in the house when you have a zoom meeting.
Uff on the toilet stuff. Mine still does okay, though he drops urine all over the stool rug, so that is washed often. He's somewhat meticulous with his bathroom upkeep, minus the potty spotted rug.
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Oooh the background noise. Yes, DH has that issue too.
But what was odd about processing sounds is early days, pre-diagnosis, he started doing this weird thing with needing noise in order to function. Walking into a room, he'd immediately turn the radio on. So, kitchen, dining room, living room, bedroom - radios were all on and tuned to different stations, yet you could hear bits of it all. It made it SO hard for me to concentrate while studying. Then, he would also try to have a conversation with you, and expect you to hear over the news reporter speaking from one corner, plus music from the next room. He mentioned that his associate also said it was distracting and asked for the radio to be turned off more than once, so they could focus in meetings. I think it had something to do with is brain/cognition/focus issues beginning.
But last year, around stage 4 and 5, the normal household background noises definitely became a problem like M1 mentioned. We have radiator heat, so when the pipes made any kind of knocking sound with the steam heating up, he thought it was the basement door and burglars. So, over and over, 5-6 times a night DH woke us up with: "what's that"? Me: Its the radiator. "What?" Me: The heater. "No that's not it " Me: yes (and stage appropriate explanation). Every few minutes, same conversation since he'd forget. Now, he doesn't understand the science explanation so I don't. But any noise outside is "what's that? "who did that? "did you hear that?" And he swears it is inside the house, coming from a totally different direction when it was a dog barking, motorcycle, or car radio passing by outside. Brain is definitely playing tricks on him.
Nancy, my DH is reading under his breath...out loud so it sounds like he's talking to himself. Everything he sees in print on a poster, billboard or flyer. Mouthing the sounds and this is new. Old mail, old birthday cards, grocery receipts. Anything with a bit of print on it. And I can hear that he's struggling more. Losing some skills in that regard. He's trying to sound words out that would never have been a problem for him before, and often not getting them right. This man has multiple university degrees and has written papers for international audiences and state policy. It is so sad. Also, he is reading posted signs out loud, but misunderstanding the meaning. I can see why driving is such an issue for anyone with dementia since you just never know the order, or pace that their comprehension will slip. And if a driver can't decipher, remember, or comprehend the meaning of "Stop", "Children at Play", "Yield", or "Stop for Pedestrians in Crosswalk" it could be tragic.
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ButterflyWings wrote:
I can see why driving is such an issue for anyone with dementia since you just never know the order, or pace that their comprehension will slip. And if a driver can't decipher, remember, or comprehend the meaning of "Stop", "Children at Play", "Yield", or "Stop for Pedestrians in Crosswalk" it could be tragic.
Yes, driving is hard even when everyone else does what they should. In the real world, it is even harder because the driver has to figure out what to do when others do something stupid. A few years ago, a ball rolled into the street from between two parked cars. I dropped the anchor as soon as I saw the ball, even though I couldn't see the small boy chasing it, because runaway balls often have pursuers. I stopped about a foot short of him when he popped out from between the cars without looking. I shiver every time I think of how that could have gone.
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My DW is late stage 6 (6d), and she has been challenged for some time to interpret sounds she hears. Her hearing itself appears to be fine, but processing and understanding what caused the noise now seems to be beyond her. Sadly, more losses along the way.0
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Hello to all fellow caregivers. My DW is progressing. The biggest is that she is not able to keep a conversation on a topic. She was diagnosed in April 2015. Unfortunately, she can not tolerate the med similar to xelon. She nearly died shortly after being prescribed. Now she just takes Namenda. To help with stress and anxiety she is taking Mirtazapine. DW has not fixed a meal for over 4 years. She still eats but is getting more picky. She will not eat anything that is black and that includes pepper if you add it to her food. We try what she likes but that is getting hit or miss. We usually give her what she will eat like fruits, ice cream and lately hot dogs. As for loud noises, she can not tolerate them. Even when our dogs bark upsets her. I suspect she is seeing things that are not there or even multiple objects when only one exist.
I get her breakfast, medication, multivitamin, vitamin D and her Namenda in the morning. I now and have been for several years, select her clothes, help her bathe and dry, coax her to brush her teeth, assist with dressing. We now have most of her clothing pull on and she is slightly incontinent. She does use the toilet by herself, but uses a lot of tissue. She will even clog the toilet, but she is doing it by herself. Now having a companion come in for 3 days 4 hours each visit.
Just getting more difficult. I am considering stopping all the meds, as I really don't see any help. Our neurologist does not recommend stopping as he believes there is some aid. Our PC is not in favor of continuing the Namenda. He has read that after a year of that alone is not very beneficial. Our neurologist also does not retest as the patient, DW, will progress at her pace. We just keep him informed of the progression by email.
Sorry I am just venting as I have not participated before. Yes I am missing personal interaction and conversation. That is why I brought in a companion so I can volunteer at my old job.
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Buterflywings, it is tragic what happens to the brain when they try to read or listen to something. My DH does not comprehend much of anything.
Indeed driving is a major issue. My husband stopped driving after an accident in 2013. Amazingly it was not his fault, but our son intervened when he was released by his foot surgeon to drive again. I could not have accomplished what our son did. Anyway, there was a lot of arguing/bargaining from my DH, but ultimately he gave up and stopped asking. He would now and then back the car in and out of the garage and one day last month, he moved the car from the regular spot I had parked it in, to a wheel chair one because he has a wheel chair placard!
I was shocked, as he just asked for the car keys, as we were checking out, so he could go wait in the car!! I'm on to that game! I told him that he is not licensed or insured and cannot ever drive, even in the parking lot. He will never get the car keys again.
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I don’t know what was worse last night, July 4…my barking and shaking beagle or my husband announcing gun shots every few seconds. I had to repeat that they were fireworks until they all stopped. Finally we all fell asleep but at 3 am my husband wet the bed. My four-pad-rule saved the sheet and the mattress (two pads under the sheet and two pads over the sheet). The mattress is covered too but the blanket and its cover sheet were another story. And now the other end is starting to be out of control, just before a long awaited family trip is coming up at the end of the month. I am terrified that my husband will lose control in my brother’s house where we’ll be staying. I must see my 99 year old mother so there’s no canceling this trip. He is wearing the heaviest pads or adult diapers. What a cruel twist of fate this horrendous disease is.0
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paris, I am sorry this is happening at such an inopportune time. It is a cruel twist of fate.Do what you can to be prepared for the worst and hopefully it won't happen.
We went to see my 101 year old Mother three weeks ago. First time since the covid.
The dog was dying but we took her along, as there was no one left here to watch her. Everything went okay. No vomiting or diarrhea. DH did let the dog fall down the stairs on the first trip up. Thankfully she was okay and I carried her from then on.
I took towels, doggy potty pads and plenty of stuff to clean up with if I needed to.
We lost the dog last week, after chemo made her worse and seeing her suffer anymore was not an option for me. My husband never mentions her unless I do. At least he knows the dog is gone, as he slept with her, but he shows no signs of caring.
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Commonly Used Abbreviations
DH = Dear Husband
DW= Dear Wife, Darling Wife
LO = Loved One
ES = Early Stage
EO = Early Onset
FTD = Frontotemporal Dementia
VD = Vascular Dementia
MC = Memory Care
AL = Assisted Living
POA = Power of Attorney
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