Normal Aging or Early Dementia

emkaye

My mom is 79 and is the sole caregiver for my father. My father is disabled (from previous stroke) so my mom does all the cooking, shopping and cleaning. She is very active physically and socially. She goes out to lunch or breakfast several times a week.

Within the last 6 months I've noticed some memory issues but not sure if this is normal aging or early stages of dementia:

• Repeats stories that she told me a few days earlier (If I remind her, she does not repeat and usually prefaces these stories with "did I tell you?, I can't remember if I did)
• Occasionally mixes up dates/times. She doesn't forget them but may get them out of order. 

I have access to all her medical records. Her last MMSE came back with a perfect score but it's been a few years. I believe I am going to call her doctor before her next appointment to voice my concerns. Is the doctor obligated to tell my mom that I spoke to her? I've checked her recent blood work... all within normal ranges.

My final concern... my mom took a low dose benzo (lorazepam) for years as prescribed for insomnia. Her doctors weaned her off in 2017 due to the risk of dementia and she went through full blown withdrawals. 

There is no history of dementia in our family with the exception of her cousin who recently passed, however her cousin was born with brain damage and had uncontrolled blood sugar when she passed which probably contributed to her dementia.

dayn2nite2

Certainly, you should continue with your plan to have her see a doctor (you need to be present because our LOs can't reliably account for what was said/what happens during a visit).

Your observations so far don't sound like normal aging.

My mother also had no history of Alzheimer's or any sort of dementia in her family, but guess what she had the last 6-8 years of her life?

Look through the pantry at their home and the refrigerator.  Expired food?  How far out of date?  Multiple of the same item?  Look at the cleanliness of the home?  Was she previously very clean and now things aren't so clean?  Look in the bathroom, how clean is that?

Is she driving?  Do you know if she takes an extraordinary long time to do a normal trip to a store?  Could she be getting lost even if she's only driving a few miles?  Look at the vehicle.  Any unexplained scrapes, damage?  Has she reported any accidents to you over the past couple of years?

Has she had any falls over the past year or so?  Balance is often an issue.  You're going to need to become a detective because even if she's impaired, they cover well.

Rick4407

To me you are describing normal aging.  We all lose a little effectiveness in muscles and organs as we age.   Her Dr would not be required to report to her your concerns.  Rick

Quilting brings calm

It’s not a bad idea to take her to the doctor and discuss getting some caregiving help.  She’s 79 and she is the sole care giver, and probably the only person taking care of all the ‘adulting’ for the household.  Sounds like caregiver stress to me.

emkaye

dayn2nite2 wrote:

Look through the pantry at their home and the refrigerator.  Expired food?  How far out of date?  Multiple of the same item?  Look at the cleanliness of the home?  Was she previously very clean and now things aren't so clean?  Look in the bathroom, how clean is that?

Is she driving?  Do you know if she takes an extraordinary long time to do a normal trip to a store?  Could she be getting lost even if she's only driving a few miles?  Look at the vehicle.  Any unexplained scrapes, damage?  Has she reported any accidents to you over the past couple of years?

Has she had any falls over the past year or so?  Balance is often an issue.  You're going to need to become a detective because even if she's impaired, they cover well.

None of the above so far. My mother does tend to keep expired food, but that is nothing new. She is of the generation of "if it looks good and smells good it must be ok" This drives me nuts but this is fairly common here (It's a Pennsylvania Dutch kind of thing).

She is still driving but haven't noticed her being late or getting lost. Although she did forget to shut off the car when we met for dinner recently. She had popped out to check to see if she was straight in the lines and forgot that the engine was running (this did concern me but she is slightly hard of hearing so I don't think she heard it running.)

My mom is actually very active and outside almost everyday. She is a neat freak and is always raking, "picking up sticks" etc. This has not changed, nor has the cleanliness of the house. They have a cat (of which I'm allergic to) and she always vacuumes before I come over.

None of the above so far. My mother does tend to keep expired food, but that is nothing new. She is of the generation of "if it looks good and smells good it must be ok" This drives me nuts but this is fairly common here (It's a Pennsylvania Dutch kind of thing).

emkaye

Thanks for the advice! I'm definitely going to talk to her doctor. My main concern is the ativan she took as her "sleeping pill" for almost 15 years (and was taken off of cold turkey). She went doctor shopping and was able to get a refill from another provider; however when I called their office she hadn't been in there for over a year so I'm hoping the refill wore out. This could also account for her cognitive decline.

dayn2nite2

Perhaps normal aging, but the car left running is a big deal.  Also the fact that she needed to leave the restaurant to check to see if she parked "inside the lines."  That is odd.

Is it parked outdoors at home or in a garage?  If in a garage, make sure there is a working carbon monoxide detector near the entrance to the home from the garage.

Again, without her knowledge, give the car a once-over next time you see her.  Look for scratches and scrapes, check the tires also for scrapes (from misjudging a turn, scraping the sides of the tires against a curb).

Emily 123

This Teepa Snow video can be helpful:

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=pqmqC-702Yg

Vicki does a series of the stages: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=U_AQpq5Y3lY

emkaye

Thanks for your response. So the car situation... She was actually driving with my brother in the car. She told him to jump out and check if she was "in the lines." I don't think she trusted my brother and had to get out and look for herself, that's when we realized the car was still on.

Iris L.

How is she handling money and finances? This is a big clue.  Loss of good judgement is often an earlier sign than memory loss.  The AA has a section on 10 Signs of Dementia, or something like that.  

Iris L