Simple Shindig

LadyTexan

DH rarely leaves the house for a couple of reasons. Most days he is not interested in going anywhere. He is generally incontinent now and I am anxious about taking him to an unfamiliar environment. DH still enjoys socializing with friends and family.

My Mom will be 82 on 9/1. I had a very small simple shindig for her at our house (yesterday). It worked out well for our guests and my husband. Here's how I did it:

1. Kept it simple - 
   1. there was no meal. We served birthday cake, punch and fruit. We used paper cups and paper plates. This made serving and clean-up easy. 
   2. there were no gifts so there wasn't all the noise and confusion of wrapping paper, etc. 
   3. there was no music to create background noise which made conversation easier.
2. Kept it small - guests included my parents and siblings + significant others (SO) so including DH and me that was 7 people.
3. Kept it short - 11am - noon. I informed everyone ahead of time this was a short, simple shindig from 11 - 12.
4. I Asked for & received help - I baked a box cake. Dear sister brought the fruit and punch fixings. Sister's SO blew the leaves off of the veranda. Dear brother facilitated winding things down on time.
5. I educated the guests regarding visiting someone with dementia - a couple of months ago I found an article at dailycaring.com that I share with family and others who visit us. I also shared it with the caregiver. It puts the visitors at ease to know how to interact with DH. I am attaching excerpts of the article here.

The shindig was fun. DH was able to socialize and as a family we were able to celebrate my Mom's upcoming birthday.

Pam BH

Thanks for the guideline to give to potential visitors.  You have a knack for figuring out solutions to problems that we all can use. It's wonderful you had a celebration that was successful for all, including low stress for you.  I'm not sure who it was in a recent post that recommended the book Loving Someone Who Has Dementia by Pauline Boss, but thank you! It's what I needed right at this moment.  What I learned from that book and this guideline has allowed me to welcome visitors to relieve some of the loneliness because I don't feel comfortable leaving DH alone due to fall risks.

Ed1937

WOW, Lady! You should teach a class on living with someone with dementia!! You really have it all together. Thanks for posting. Wins are always good to read about. And thanks for the article. Always good to have things like that.

abc123

Absolutely the best info/news/update I've heard in over a month! I'm happy you all had quality family time to celebrate. Happy, happy for you & DH.

Joe C.

LT, That is a great guideline, thank you for sharing.