update on my mother

Pumpkin Pie 2020

Hi!  I only posted one or two messages in this forum after I first joined. I thought I should give you an update.

My 82 year-old mother was diagnosed with vascular dementia at the beginning of January.  She passed away on March 15.  Although I am sad and miss her, I am grateful that the COVID outbreak allowed me to teach my students online from my hometown where I could visit my mom daily for two weeks in February and one week in March.  Our last hurrah was watching the DVD "Mamma Mia" together, and my mom was smiling and bouncing her legs to the music.  At one point, she laughed aloud!  Then, after going with the aide to brush her teeth, she came back slumped to one side, seemingly from a stroke.  The aides put her in her bed, and she fell asleep.  Since she was on hospice (and there was no plan to do anything other than keep her comfortable in the event of a stroke), we didn't wake her to assess for a stroke.  The next morning, she was not able to hold herself up for breakfast, and she became less responsive over the course of the day.  The last thing she said to me as I was leaving that morning was, "I love you, (Name)!"  That was a Friday.  We were back up there (three hours from our house) Sunday night, too late for visiting hours (but COVID restrictions limited the number of visitors allowed, so I was happy to not have to join in the rotation with my sisters since I had already had so much time with my mom during my three weeks of distance teaching).  Just before 1 AM Monday morning, the memory unit called my dad, and my husband, dad, and I went over.  My dad and I were holding my mom's hand when she passed around 1:30 AM.  I was grateful to the memory unit for making my mom's room look so nice from Friday through Monday (bed turned so people could sit on both sides, battery-operated candles on both bedside tables, dimmed lights) and to hospice for keeping my mom comfortable the entire time.

Two months after my mom passed away from vascular dementia, we found out that my husband's mom, age 76, has Alzheimer's.  It is especially sad because my husband's dad already had to see his own mother live with and ultimately die with Alzheimer's.

 
So you may see me on the forum again.  Please take care of yourselves.

dayn2nite2

I'm so sorry for the loss of your mother.  And also finding out there is another family member diagnosed.

Take care of yourself and yes, please come back and let us know how things are going.

abc123

Please accept my sincere condolences on the loss of your Mother. I’m glad you got to spend that time with her.

Deanna_M

Thank you for the update and I am so sorry for the loss of your dear mother. Please take good care.

Pumpkin Pie 2020

Thank you all for your kind words.