VENT - Pooping Confusion

LadyTexan

DH has been in disposable briefs for quite a while. I watch him like a hawk when he is my eye sight to get him to the bathroom. And he has gotten much better at telling me when he feels the need to go.

This morning DH let me know that he needed to go to the bathroom. I got him successfully to the toilet. He later told me he was done. I wiped his hiney and pulled up his drawers. We washed our hands together. Then he kept washing his hands. I returned to my cold coffee in the living room. DH was still in my eye sight.

DH spent more time washing his hands, which is unusual. Next thing I know he was picking at his butt. I asked what's wrong. DH pulled out a handful of poop. Argh. So in this case, DH knew he had to go and thought he knew when he was done but he was a little off. Thank goodness for the disposable briefs as they contained the mess. I got DH in the shower and cleaned up. 

This was just another eye opener for me about the craziness of this disease and the disconnect between the brain and the body and the bodily functions. Fecal incontinence is the real s#it show. When I hear others casually throw the term around, I want to scream "You have no idea!"

Newbernian

Oh Darlin', I feel so bad for you.  I am not there, yet.  I feel your aggravation and frustration, already.

Ed1937

LadyTexan wrote:

 I want to scream "You have no idea!"

Isn't that the truth? At least you have people here who understand.

June45

Oh my, LadyTexan, what a way to start your morning and cold coffee to boot!

mrl

Oh LT,,,,

Been there done that, mine would hand it to me......

My sympathy,

Michele

dayn2nite2

I just had a flashback to when I was taking care of my mom.  We were in the bathroom and I was about to help her wash her hands and she was digging in her pants.  I asked what she was doing and she brought out a piece and put it on the counter next to the sink.  I got lightheaded and it took everything in me to not pass out and stay calm.

LadyTexan

It is both sad and comforting to have such a large group of people who understand. 

I did stay calm, even cheerful. But the smell factor was off the charts. The bathrooms are now clean and refreshed. I started the aromatherapy mist maker and I am feeling much better.

DH was upset about what happened. He says he doesn't know what is happening to him. Sadly, I know what is happening. You all know what is happening. It goes in one direction: bad to horrible and then to even worse.

French

 In the same line.

Yesterday, after dinner, he had a stomachache. I take him to the bathroom. And leave him alone for 1 minute. When I came back he was getting dressed without having done anything. I told him he didn't do anything, he said "no, I didn't finish". So I put him back on the toilet and 1 minute later he got up again without having done anything. When I ask him, he tells me that his stomach doesn't hurt anymore. I gave up.

I told him that I wanted to go to the jacuzzi tonight and asked him if he wants the TV (I don't want to propose him the jacuzzi anymore, it's too complicated to manage). He preferred to go to bed. So pajamas, toothbrush and he in bed, me in the jacuzzi.

30 minutes later, he arrived in the garden saying it's weird I'm wet and showing me the front of his pajamas. I could smell the soap and poo. I thought  "Oh no, now also urinary incontinence". Well no, it was wet with shampoo. He pooped in his pajamas and tried to wash himself with shampoo.

Yes strange to see how they can become se confused with that.

Beachfan

LT,

Don’t you just hate it when your 24/7 hawk eye vigilance backfires? (Literally and figuratively!).   Very rarely, thankfully, DH becomes slightly constipated.  I can usually tell because he skips several days without a bowel movement and he will remain seated on the toilet  for longer than usual.  He might expel a little something and then he rocks back and forth as though trying to shake something loose.  (Squeamish newbies may want to stop reading at this point.)  I start the clean up with damp wipes, but then soap up a warm, wet wash cloth and dig and scrub away until he’s clean.  It doesn’t happen often and he no longer has the mental wherewithal to try to clean himself up, so bigger, odiferous messes are avoided.  I’ll take that as a win- -?  Good luck, hang in there!  

ladyzetta

Dearest Lady,

You are the best and your DH is lucky to have you there for him. That trophy you are holding truly belongs to you.  Please don't overlook taking care of yourself. Hugs Zetta 

abc123

LT, I’m sorry this is happening at your house too. My momma gets very confused when she needs to have a bowel movement. It’s very strange and incredibly sad.

tboard

https://alzconnected.org/discussion/58094/vent-pooping-confusion

I just got finished with poop clean up. DH tries to hide it but he can't hide the smell. I wish I could get hime to wear pull ups. I am getting better at cleaning it up before he tries to do it and ends up making a bigger mess and clogging the toilet. This is the third shit storm this week. I hope it is the last.

marier

Oh yes, I know what "shit storms" are ! I try so hard to get my DH on the toilet every two hours. It's a good day when he makes it to the toilet in time. However it is hit and miss.

annie51

So sorry to hear about all your challenges around this not-so-nice topic. While my DH is not yet at the incontinence stage, he does have issues cleaning himself up and sometimes uses his fingers like others have said. My problem now is that he won’t let me come in to help. When I knock and try to enter he gets very angry. I don’t know how to handle this!

M5M

it’s probably too late to install a bidet for these folks who are so far along, but for those “reading ahead” about how things can develop, let me strongly suggest getting one. There are models from $75 to hundreds, but a basic style can work wonders in cleanup for your LO.
I had wanted one for years, DH was never interested, about a year ago I bought one, and the first time he used it, he was hooked. Now as he is way into stage 5/6, he is using pads for urine, and so far has made it to the toilet nearly every time to poop. He has never been able to figure out the bidet remote- he has significant vision issues and also can’t feel the button to push. I accompany him to toilet and wait till he is done. This works so far, but I doubt he would accept it if just now installed. At least I think it has given us more time before the really yucky issues.