Dementia and Assisted living

Donjalar

Does others on here have dementia or alzheimers living in assited living or still on thier own?

mommyandme (m&m)

I just read your first post and understand you’re speaking about loved ones.

I believe there are members here that have loved ones with dementia living in assisted living or on their own.  Depends on safety.  My mother has 24/7 care at her home. Sorry that I can’t be more helpful.

harshedbuzz

My advice will more or less be as it was in the other thread you started.

If your mom is at the point where she is talking in circles repeating herself, it's likely the Assisted Living Cruise has left without her leaving her a candidate for Memory Care. Another option would be 24/7 caregivers in the home but that is crazy expensive unless family is providing the care.

Whatever the decision is, you will likely need to make it on your own without her input. I get that she doesn't want to go to a SNF, but unless she has bought a robust LTC policy or squirrelled away hundreds of thousands for care at home, a facility is probably what is possible now. 

With a massive amount of oversight, it might be possible for a PWD to live independently for a time in the very earliest stages of the disease. But then one day it won't and that can be tragic. My aunt, who was not diagnosed and living on her own did OK until about a year after her husband died when her sister found her sitting in a cold dark house with no water (well) wondering why the TV wouldn't work. The house was listed for a Sheriff's sale because she hadn't paid taxes on it. My aunt obtained emergency and then permanent guardianship and moved her into MC.

She was luckier than a woman around these parts who died a couple years ago. She had mild Alzheimer's and 2 DDs who lived locally. DD1 visited her each weekday before going into her 11-7 shift at the hospital; she gave morning pills, fed breakfast and left a plated lunch for mom. DD2 picked mom up on her way home from teaching a little after 3; they ran errands together, fixed dinner, and watched a little TV before heading to mom's place to get her ready for bed. They split weekends. Mom lived in the home in which she raised her girls and had neighbors looking out for her. And it worked really well until that one time it didn't. 

Mom decided to take a shower after DD2 left. For some reason, she went outside. A neighbor walking her dog early the next morning found mom's body covered only in a light dusting of snow.  

Emily 123

My mom lives in an assisted living where there's a focus on dementia, and the access is closely monitored.  Her place does have a MC, and during the day the AL and MC folks interact together in the common areas.  My mom has anosognosia, but also knows her memory isn't working like it used to. She is not as frail as some of the others there-I wish they had more outdoor physical activities, but Covid really upset their staffing and now with shortages they are working to get back to where they were with those. In terms of keeping her safe it was the best fit--she's not at a point where she needs MC yet.  I was concerned about her getting outside & lost if she was at a regular AL, as well as possible challenges socializing--without an ability to remember anyone it's hard to make friends. 

Another option you might want to look at if your mom needs more than AL, but less than MC is a private care home, where the person lives in a home with several others, and the people who run the home are always around.  

kmasen_act2

I work in the industry, it's becoming quite common for residents in Assisted Living facilities to have ALZ and not be on Memory Care units.

shellybear

My mother is currently living in an AL home. It has worked very well up until now as she has progressed to another phase of the disease. 

Unfortunately there aren't any Memory Care facilities where she is located. We are unable to find care aides that will stay due to COVID or some other reason.  

We are at a loss for what to do for her. I think that she may qualify for an in home care aide through Medicare if we were to take her out of the facility.  I'm still researching that.