Finding Hope

Daizey

I am new to this journey and to this forum. I have appreciated comments from others who are feeling what I am feeling. While my family is very supportive, they aren't "in the trenches" 24/7. My husband was diagnosed with MCI in June, 2018, one month after my much-anticipated retirement. I initially felt cheated to finally be ready to spend our golden years together, only to have it snatched away. At the same time, I believed that it was God's perfect timing. There is no way I could have continued to work and leave my husband at home alone.

He has progressed in his diagnosis to early Alzheimers.With each new setback, I felt more and more cut off from the rest of the world emotionally. My future seemed so bleak. Finding this online group has been a blessing. Realizing how much worse it's going to be, I am choosing to be happy where we are and to cherish these days. I cannot change the future, but I can choose how to manage my present.

One very powerful inspiration to me has been a book by author, Max Lucado, entitled "Unshakable Hope." I checked it out from my local library. He has many inspirational books, but this one touched me personally. I would highly recommend it to anyone who struggles with handling a bleak future.

elainechem

Welcome to the group, although I'm very sorry for the reason that you are here. I am an alumnus of this horrible disease. My hubby died in February, 2020 after suffering for 8 1/2 years. He was 65. I really believe that the only reason that I'm still here is that the Lord was carrying me through.

Ed1937

Hello Daisey. Welcome to the forum. Sorry you need to be here. But it's a good forum with lots of people who have been where you are now, or they have been there in the past. You will get a lot of understanding here, so just post about anything that is bothering you.

Beachfan

Daizey wrote:

 Realizing how much worse it's going to be, I am choosing to be happy where we are and to cherish these days. I cannot change the future, but I can choose how to manage my present.

Daizey,

Welcome and sorry you need to be here.  That being said, it seems to me that you have a good attitude which will serve you well going forward.  My DH was diagnosed in May, 2010, with MCI, although looking back, there were signs of cognitive impairment prior to diagnosis.  Like you, we were recently retired and planning a bright, carefree future.  Now he is solid stage 6 and can do virtually nothing for himself or by himself.  My advice: do what you can do while you can do it.  Travel, enjoy your family and friends.  Take one day at a time and don't go looking for trouble.  This is not the future I would have chosen for us, but I refuse to wallow.  So many have it so much worse than me.  Stay in touch, ask questions, offer suggestions, rant, whatever it takes.  Good luck and hang in there.  

Daizey

Thank you for your response. I have had a hard time recently with my own emotions, due partially to lack of sleep and dealing with new "behaviors." When I began to read posts here from people who are much farther along on the journey than we are, I thought, "What am I complaining about!" I realized that I have been the guest of honor at my own pity party. I promised myself I would not waste another day feeling sorry for myself.

Crushed

Daizey wrote:

One very powerful inspiration to me has been a book by author, Max Lucado, entitled "Unshakable Hope." I checked it out from my local library. He has many inspirational books, but this one touched me personally. I would highly recommend it to anyone who struggles with handling a bleak future.

I would only point out that this is a religious book

I have no problem with those who find comfort in their religion,  

But religious suggestions to those who do not share that faith are often a source of  pain. 

Again use whatever comforts you with a total blessing

Daizey

Sorry. I didn't intend to offend anyone. Just shared what was helpful to me. Anyone else can take it or leave it.

jfkoc

Yes, do what you can and please do not borrow trouble. Many of the thing written about here may never come your way.  If they do we will be here, by your side.

Ed1937

Daizey wrote:

I have had a hard time recently with my own emotions, due partially to lack of sleep and dealing with new "behaviors." 

This sentence got my attention. If he is showing sudden new behaviors, it could be due to a UTI. UTIs can cause some dramatic symptoms, even though the typical symptoms might not show up. If symptoms appear suddenly, it is probably worth having a test for UTI. If positive, once the infection is cleared up, he could return to baseline in a short time. Of course there are other things that could cause the symptoms, including progression, but UTIs are fairly common.