Sometimes it's still hard to believe

Lindsay22

Visited mom on Saturday at MC. She was SO out of it and confused while on Wednesday she had been OK (OK for a person with stage 5-6 AD, not actually OK).  The ups and downs are typical for her, and I know typical for most folks with AD but sometimes it's still so shocking. She was really upset about her sheets but couldn't come up with the words and just kept saying "when will I get it?" "what do I get?" and other random things.  She was very worried about food (also typical for her) and focused on that.  I know it's all par for the course but sometimes I still can't believe this is my mom.  Her personality is totally gone which is just so sad because it was a good one! 

Sigh, thanks for letting me vent. 

SusanB-dil

The right place for venting - sorry you are dealing with that.  (again)

harshedbuzz

I'm sorry. 

So many parts of this disease are hard.

The4thOne

Go ahead Lindsay22, this is the place to vent, because this is where people 'get it'.  Even the most seasoned of caregivers still will shake their head at some of the things they see in their LO who is now living this 'head-heart-mess' as one of my friends calls it.  Share, and even if you get a therapist to deal with your emotions, still come here and share.  Because, yes, we do know...it is hard to believe.

Jo C.

Lindsay, I am so sorry and can well imagine how heartbreaking this is for you.   While she may have had a history of "up and down," it may well be that the increase in this is secondary to another cause.

May be worth having the doctor order labs to ascertain the status of her various systems; sometimes there is a little something that is "out of whack," and can be easily treated. Also a good idea to have her checked for one of those "silent" urinary tract infections which can cause significant changes in behavior, and/or cognition and/or function.

It is hard; your mother is blessed to have such a loving and caring daughter.  May you find peace in knowing that your presence has made such a difference for her and that you are her "guardian angel."

Take good care of you and let us know how you are; we care.

J.

Lindsay22

Her MC has a doctor that checks on her every Wednesday and does labs regularly.  What is happening is well within the realm of normal for someone who is stage 6, good days and bad.  Sometimes people aren't actually asking for advice, just looking to share. 

mommyandme (m&m)

Thank you for sharing.  This darn disease is so abnormally normal that it’s hard to wrap our minds around day in and day out.

Antoinette T

Thank you for sharing. It’s important to have a safe place to vent. I didn’t talk about  my mom’s dementia for years. She was first diagnosed with mild cognitive impairment about 6 years ago. She was diagnosed with Alzheimer’s May 2020 after a psychiatric hospitalization. Some days she appears lucid, but other days she is confused and disoriented. She has been hallucinating. It is shocking and very sad. My heart breaks a little each time I see or speak to her.

EJ97

I get what you are saying, Lindsay22. I have been visiting my mom three or four times a week for the last few years (except during covid lockdown) and as she declines I try to roll with it. The random remarks and questions, never knowing how she will be that day. But, the other day she looked me in the eyes and said "I'm so glad you came."  It was a glimpse of the mom I knew and I hugged her, but I knew it was a fluke. I was happy and sad at the same time.

kyronae

God, does that resonate. I understand, Lindsay. I miss my mom so much, too. 

Here's wishing you as many good days as possible, and good enough they are an anchor to hold on to during the rest of the storm.

bboop217

my heart is breaking reading these posts, I'm crying. Mom was on a rant today that has included a visit to the ER ruled out UTI, sent home tonight and rant continued. She lives with my youngest brother, he's in mid sixties with health issues of his own. I'm 500 miles away. Another brother just drove out about 70 miles to help out tonight. Look like we will need to place her.